


Affection Touching Across Time:Amell

by loverofallfiction



Series: Affection Touching Across Time [2]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games)
Genre: Agonizingly slow burn, Angst, Dark, F/M, Psychological Torture, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-12-15
Updated: 2015-05-04
Packaged: 2018-03-01 15:03:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 58,838
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2777558
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/loverofallfiction/pseuds/loverofallfiction
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Herald is the title he carries in a world torn asunder as he starts to feel what that title means. Solona Amell, Chancellor to King Alistair and Elissa Cousland, is tasked to be the Ferelden ambassador to the Inquisition. Soon the past comes back to haunt her when she sees a familiar face. Cullen/Amell Inquisitor/ Cassandra AU Spoilers.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

 

**Prologue**

Haven was peaceful in an eerie sort of way, despite the fact that the forecast had a hundred percent chance of raining demons. The world had been thrown into chaos. Mages were fighting templars. Templars were fighting mages. Civil unrest as brother fought against brother. The list could go on to describe the problems that Thedas was facing. For the past week, the moon had been absent since smoke darkened the cloudy, night sky from the remains of the Temple of Sacred Ashes. The observer wearily sighed and looked at his left hand clenched in a fist.

This hand was the reason he was a not a charred statue along with many soldiers during the failed peace talks at the Conclave. He could not help feel bitter as he continued to watch the smoke rise with his green eyes. Each wisp was like a soul of the departed from that day. Fate was a fickle thing choosing him to be the sole survivor of that cataclysm _._ _Was it better to be dead?_ The man shook his head. There was no use focusing on the what ifs and why nots. Regardless of his personal beliefs, too much responsibility now hung on his shoulders. He could truly feel his shoulders sag with the burden in his solitude.

He did not know whether his decision to help the mages was the right one.

Cassandra said they needed magic for the mark, so they needed to seek out the mages. He trekked across the Hinterlands fighting mercenaries and closing fade rifts until he eventually arrived to Redcliffe. After speaking to Grand Enchanter Fiona, everything that could possibly go wrong went wrong. He could not believe that he fell for a trap at Redcliffe's castle. As a reward, he had to fight through hordes of demons in the future to confront Alexius and then an angry King of Ferelden.

Before he even had a chance to talk to the Templars, King Alistair made the decision to banish all mages from Ferelden. He couldn't bear to see the innocent mages of Ferelden banished. The thought of countless innocent men, women, and children in the streets of foreign lands was unbearable, so he did the only thing he could: invited them all into the Inquisition. Of course, Cassandra and Cullen had been furious but he didn't care as long as each child got a bed.

He absentmindedly stroked the tree he was leaning against. Each decision had a consequence and the consequences could aid in the horrible future of the destruction of Thedas. Did he truly make the right choice?

"Herald, I have news." He inwardly groaned at the intrusion to his solitude and glared at the soldier wearing thin chainmail armor.

 _By the Maker what is it now?_ "What is it?"

The soldier failed to see his annoyance and delivered his report. "Our scouts report Ferelden riders are coming our way." The Herald shifted his weight to his other foot, causing the snow to crunch in the process.

His brow knitted in concentration, trying to deal with the news. Cullen said many have come to Haven to join the order. The Herald failed to see how this information was important.

"So, we have new recruits. Why bother me with this?"

The soldier heard his frustrated tone and cleared his throat from nervousness as he fidgeted with his helmet that he had removed. "Their banners bear the royal seal."

It was an ambassador from Ferelden then. He rubbed his temple at the tension headache that started to form. Well, they could wait. He had enough faction dealing for one day.

"House them in the best beds we have, and I'll talk with them in the morning."

"But, Ser!" The soldier squeaked as he looked at Maxwell Trevelyan incredulously. "It is said that King Alistair is among them."

 _So the king finally got over his childish outburst in Redcliffe?_ Maxwell could not help but chuckle at the thought. He did not think highly of the Ferelden king because of his unprofessional manner. "Very well, thank you for this information. Send word to Leliana, Josephine, and Cullen. I want them present at the front gate to greet his Majesty."

"Yes, Ser." The soldier beat his right arm over his plated chest as he left to carry out the order.

As Trevelyan traveled down the hill, he could see the silhouettes of his three advisors become bigger as he got closer to the front gates of Haven. He opened the double wooden doors, and the hinges creaked in protest from the lack of oil. Luckily, he was still wearing his dragonmail armor since he did not have any other formal wear to greet the king.

" … but whatever the case, his arrival is important-" Leliana could not finish her explanation as the sound of hooves galloped loudly towards their direction. A few riders circled them holding Ferelden royal banners, whereas a figure wearing gold heavy armor dismounted off his horse.

"Greetings, I am Alistair Theirin." The king smiled a goofy grin before his expression sobered. "I had wanted to apologize for not being in the best of moods at Redcliffe. I tried to protect this particular groups of mages for years. Yet, at their first opportunity, they decided to have a house party with Tevinter magisters at my uncle's estate. Nasty business aside, I had done some thinking. I believe that the Inquisition is what this world needs now since all the other kingdoms seem to be twiddling their thumbs these days waiting to be attacked."

The Herald looked at the young king with scrutiny."Is that what you are doing? Sitting on your throne being a lame duck waiting for an enemy to swoop down on you!?" Trevelyan challenged feeling his blood boil. He could not believe that the royal powers were doing nothing while the whole world could possibly end tomorrow.

" Maxwell." Leliana's Orlesian voice chided. Maxwell's self control was diminishing the longer he stared at the king. If the king made one more inappropriate response, then one of is advisors would have to hold him back from punching Alistair.

Alistair smirked at the blonde Herald's outburst. "It does appear this way doesn't it? No, we won't let them swoop down on us. After all, swooping is bad. No, after the Blight, Ferelden is still suffering. We are aiding the reconstruction but our forces are still few in number. We are likely to be invaded by Orlais as the tension rises."

"Which I hope it does not come to that because I do love their cheeses. "The king muttered to himself before continuing with all seriousness. "With this said, I would like to aid the Inquisition in any way I can, but I can't send any of my troops to aid your cause." He looked at a crow that cawed on a tree.

"King Alistair, why did you come?" Leliana questioned the king as she too looked at the crow with confusion. Maxwell could not blame her because he thought it was odd that a crow was out especially at night.

Alistair brushed her comment aside while he looked at his gauntlet rather bored. "I said you were not getting any soldiers, but it does not mean you are not receiving aid. I am offering to provide my Chancellor to aid your cause. Although the ambassador should be here by now since I did force her to come here." The king finished, scratching his head rather nervously.

"You don't mean…" Leliana trailed off while her eyes grew wide with realization when she looked at Cullen. Maxwell thought Leliana caught on to the king's offer, but he thought it would be disrespectful calling her out.

"Forgive me, your Majesty, but Josephine is an ambassador, who is adequate enough to our cause." Cullen began clearly confused as he scratched his neck where the fur cradled around his shoulders. "I mean no disrespect to your offer, but two ambassadors would suggest that the Inquisition are playing enemies with sides."

"Did I say ambassador? No, I mean warrior." Maxwell thought the king was starting to sound like a merchant trying to get rid of merchandise. There was a catch somewhere, there always was a catch. "Look, all I am saying is you need men. In addition, she has access to Grey Warden treaties so she can obtain aid when needed." There it was, a Grey Warden. When a Grey Warden was involved, then there was something at stake.

"In other words, she must be a Grey Warden?" Trevelyan stared at the king, daring him to prove him wrong.

"She was still a Grey Warden, when I spoke to her an hour ago." Maxwell scoffed at the king's tendency to deflect serious conversations with humor.

"Who exactly is this Chancellor? I was not aware that the crown had one." The Commander rubbed his chin thoughtfully while his other hand still grasped his sheathed sword.

The Herald thought this was all funny business. If the king was not forthright with his offer, then he did not want any part in all of this. "I agree with Cullen. I don't see why a Grey Warden advises the crown. We already have a Grey Warden in the Inquisition ranks. What use will another one have?" Trevelyan crossed his arms while skeptically looking at the king.

"Herald…" Trevelyan's advisors looked at him funny. They could not believe he had just asked that question.

"Ha! That is a good one. You are joking right?" Alistair laughed heartily, thinking the so called Herald was pulling his leg. The laughter died as soon as he saw the man's serious look. "You aren't joking."

"Herald, King Alistair and her Majesty Elissa are Grey Wardens." Josephine answered with her heavy Antivan accent. She looked at the king apologetically. The Herald thought it was funny that she was trying to repair the damage that he made.

"This particular Grey Warden can provide more troops to your cause." The king reminded.

Trevelyan put a hand over his face as he thought about the options. He could tell the king to sod off but that would harm the Inquisition in the long run. At least, Blackwell was forthright with why he wanted to join the Inquisition. He did not like the idea of this unknown Grey Warden joining their cause. On the one hand, they'll have more men."I see we can use more troops."

On the other hand, if they were going to die of the Breach anyway, why not risk it? "Alright, where is this… Chancellor? Did she arrive?" He questioned, sounding defeated.

"Excellent!" The king clapped his hands in excitement. "I think introductions are in order." Alistair snapped his fingers, and the crow that was on the tree cawed loudly and flew down. All of a sudden, a burst of magic flew out of the crow.

The king and Leliana were not fazed by the magic. On the other hand Trevelyan, Cullen and Josephine, were taken aback by the magic.

"By the Maker! What sort of magic is this?" Cullen pulled his sword out at the woman, who started to materialize from the magic, but the Ferelden troops had their swords drawn at Cullen.

"Oka _y_ " The king put emphasis on the last letter trying to knock those present out of their shock "now that normal transmission has resumed. I would like to introduce you all to Solona Amell, Warden Commander of Ferelden."

"Solona!" A bundle of red hair flew past Trevelyan like a nug. He did not know that Leliana could run that fast as she hugged Solona. "It has been too long."

"Yes, too long." The dark haired Warden smiled at the spymaster until her light blue eyes caught the hazel eyes of the Commander.

"Glad to see you have not changed much, Cullen. This makes this the second time you tried to kill me." The mage sneered at the former Templar, causing him to become pale.

"S-Solona I-." Maxwell could feel the awkward tension, causing gravity to make the air harder to breathe. He never knew that the normally composed Commander would be reduced to a stuttering fool due to a girl. Leliana and Cullen owed him an explanation when he was not tired. Still, it was his duty to end the tension.

"Neat trick." Maxwell could not help but feel a little impressed. "Is that all you can do?" Trevelyan noticed Cullen giving him a grateful nod for saving him from his embarrassment.

"Do you mean in terms of shape shifting? No, I can turn into almost any animal or insect, but I don't turn into spiders. That is where I draw the line…spiders." He watched as Solona shuddered, and Leliana and Alistair chuckling quietly to themselves. He definitely was having a long talk with Leliana. One thing was bothering him. How could she do magic, if she had a sword and did not wear mage armor?

"Wait your shape shifting ability requires magic, but you do not look like a mage."

The mage looked at him as though he was stupid, but he could tell how hard she was trying to hide the annoyance in her voice. "I have learned the skills of an ancient specialization known as the arcane warrior in my travels during the Blight. I can teach it to your mages if you wish. I also am proficient on using all elemental magic and other specializations, such as spirit healing." She glared at the king as she continued. "Against my better judgement and preference, it has come to my attention that the Inquisition needs help. If you would allow me to join your cause, my magic is yours. In addition, I will provide some Grey Wardens to join your cause."

"I thought Grey Wardens do not get involved in political matters." The Herald tried squeezing information from her.

"We don't, but recent events have come to my attention and I need answers. Believe me, it will benefit us all in long run." The mage crossed her arms while answering. Although her eyes was looking at the Commander, who was looking everywhere except at her.

"Thoughts?" Trevelyan did not want another argument like he had earlier with his advisors. He wanted to make sure everyone agreed.

"I feel she would be a great ally. She led the mages and templar armies in the Battle of Denerim, and I have seen her prowess in battle." Leliana answered with approval.

"So, what does an ambassador to Ferelden entail?" Josephine questioned the king.

"She will tell us what you need, and we will provide arms and money by contacting nobles who are willing to help." The king answered, smirking at the turn of events.

"In this case, we can get more aid and cover more ground. I can focus on Orlais, and she could focus on Ferelden then." Josephine nodded her head in agreement as she jotted some notes down in her book.

"Cullen?" The party present could see the Commander was rather nervous as he started to open and close his mouth. It was as though he was fighting an internal battle when he finally closed his eyes.

Maxwell was going to go ahead and accept the Warden from Leliana's and Josephine's approval, sparing Cullen from embarrassment.

"Leliana and Josephine make valid points. We do need more arms. The decision rest with you,' Cullen looked at Trevelyan before finishing. 'excuse me." He bowed his head slightly to King Alistair and briskly walked away, leaving those behind in surprise.

"Well then since…" How should he put it? "I have heard nothing but support from my advisors," Solona scoffed at Maxwell's trouble of finding words. "I would like to officially welcome you to the Inquisition."

"With alacrity."

Leliana and Alistair could hear the sarcasm dripping from Solona's voice even though she sported a smile. They looked at each other in nervousness. Alistair was nervous because Elissa would kill him when she found out what he had done. In Leliana's case, she was nervous for Cullen's life. For the Inquisition's sake, they hoped that Cullen and Solona could put their differences aside because the entire world hung in the balance.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Solona's theme https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OKVVdjlx8ow  
> Cullen's themehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HHN6YazKUxA  
> Inquisitor's theme https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1SWYoEOU2fI  
> Chapter 1: The world state https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VWZtMkDV1KM


	2. In Your Heart Shall Burn

 

* * *

Member: Cassandra Pentaghast

Location: Outside Haven

Status:Pissed

* * *

It was a typical morning in Haven for Cassandra. She checked her reports, and there weren't any pressing matters that required her attention. There was plenty of time to kill before her meeting at the War Table later that day. She walked through the snow, leaving a trail of footprints behind her as she exited the gates towards the training ground.

"Did you hear that the Hero of Ferelden, Solona Amell, arrived last night?"

She almost stumbled into her swing when she overheard the conversation of soldiers, who were loafing around. She was tempted to scold them to get back to their posts, but she figured Cullen would set them straight.

Cassandra thought she misheard the conversation anyway and unconsciously shrugged as she continued her practice.

"Hoshposh, I think you are lying." A lazy Ferelden soldier accused.

"No, Samuel was at watch last night, and he said there were a fleet of soldiers. King Alistair -" The rest of the conversation was drowned out by the sound of metal hitting metal of other soldiers practicing within the vicinity.

The Seeker gripped her sword harder as she continued her relentless training on the practice dummy. The more the soldiers talked, the harder she swung to take out her frustration. Each swing caused her poor stationary opponent to splinter and sputter hay all over the ground. If looks could burn, the fallen hay would have caught on fire with her gaze.

She swore as soon as her curiosity got the best of her, and she sheathed her sword as a result. Someone was going to answer.

"You there!" She pointed at the soldier, who was still gossiping.

The soldiers who were idling around panicked, struggling to be at attention. She glared at the soldiers' ill attempt at pretending to work.

"I overheard you saying that The Hero of Ferelden was here. Where did you see her last?" She demanded.

"I b-believe she was talking to Mother Giselle, Lady Pentaghast." The Ferelden soldier stammered.

"That will be all. Now get back to work!" She barked through clenched teeth and threw open the gates of Haven, storming up the stairs to the Chantry. All of the onlookers moved out of her way in fear.

She could not believe The Hero's selfishness. Solona knew that she was needed but did not have the decency to answer the Seeker's summons. She all but kicked open the doors of the Chantry. Her eyes scanned the area shrewdly like a hawk until they honed on her target, who was looking at a statue of Andraste.

"You were in Denerim this whole time?" Cassandra pointed an accusatory finger at the Grey Warden.

The Warden looked confused at first until she noticed the symbol on Cassandra's armor. Her face lit up with recognition. "Seeker, It depends what time frame you are talking about." Amell countered with a cheeky smirk.

Cassandra scoffed at Solona's ire. The Hero was making her blood boil.

"Where were you when we looked for you?" She continued her relentless questioning.

"I was in Amaranthine until the incident in Kirkwall." The Warden replied as though it was common knowledge.

"We looked for you in Amaranthine." There was no way the mage was going to deflect her questions.

"Then you must have missed me." Solona let out a frustrated breath as she looked at Cassandra. "Look, Seeker, I am not in the best of moods to talk. Can we postpone this to another time?"

Cassandra was not going to let the conversation end as she looked at Solona in outrage. This Warden was not honorable in any shape or form. She thought about how easy it would be to grab the mage by the neck, push her against the wall, and shake her until she understood what was at stake.

"You must understand why we need you. You are The Hero of Ferelden-" She was silenced when Solona closed her eyes while raising her hand.

"No, I am a Hero of Ferelden not The Hero. Her Majesty, Elissa Theirin, has that honor because she led us during the Blight. In addition, she commanded the Redcliffe armies and the elven armies. Believe me, I rather not be The Hero or have any more titles."

"Any more titles?"

"I come from a noble family from Kirkwall. I am or was the Arlessa of Amaranthine, Commander of the Grey, and a Hero of Ferelden. In addition, I am a mage. The people already have a poor opinion of mages, or have you forgotten? I am sorry, Seeker, but I can't be what you hoped."

What will the mage have her do then? If she was not willing to be the Inquisitor, then she could point her to the other Warden. "Surely, you know the location of The Hero of Ferelden?"

"I am sorry. I don't. All I know is that she went on an important mission to help us, Grey Wardens. Even King Alistair does not know. Like I said, this is why I was summoned to be the Chancellor."

They needed a Hero as a leader. She pleaded for the Warden to reconsider. "We need someone to lead this Inquisition. It has to be you because you are a Hero-"

"Sorry, Seeker, the answer is no. I do not have the qualities the Inquisition needs in a leader." She laughed to herself before continuing. "Heck, I was not even a leader during the Fifth Blight. The people need someone to look upon with hope. We have a mutual acquaintance, who is an inspiration to many." Solona dismissed the conversation as she walked towards the doors of the Chantry.

The Seeker felt like running her sword through something as she watched the Warden leave. "Maybe you already have your Inquisitor. He has been in front of you this whole time." Amell answered over her shoulder before walking out of the Chantry.

* * *

Member: Varric Tethras

Location: Outside Chantry

Status: Intrigued

* * *

Varric had heard some interesting rumors that had spread around Haven like wildfire. Apparently, the mage Hero of Ferelden had joined the Inquisition. He could not wait to corner her. Once that happened, he would question her about her adventures and some rumors he had heard about her.

 _For research purposes of course_. He chuckled to himself at the thought as he polished Bianca. His eyes started to bother him. Was that the sun? No, it was like someone took a mirror and directed the sunlight towards his direction.

He directed his gaze to the source and saw someone storm out of the Chantry, wearing silver and blue armor with a griffon engraved on the breastplate. The sun kept bouncing off her breastplate as she walked. His person of interest was not going to get away that easily, without giving him some information.

"I did not know we had Grey Wardens around these parts." He mused loud enough for the Warden to hear. The Warden regarded him with a skeptical look.

Varric almost laughed at her suspicion towards him. He thought she was going to ignore him and walk away. "It really should not be surprising to you, Ser Dwarf." She paused as though contemplating her next words. "Considering, I hear you _supposedly_ have a Grey Warden in the Inquisition's ranks."

He was taken aback by the disdain in her voice. _Interesting, it seems as though there is something about Blackwall that we do not know about._ He was going to try his luck and pry. _"_ Supposedly?" He began lightheartedly. "He is hard to miss. He is the one with a very bushy beard. You met him haven't you?"

"A big bushy beard you say?" The mage pretended to think for a moment. "I believe, Ser Dwarf, you have described half the men in Ferelden." He had to admit this Warden was witty,and he almost chuckled in response until her next words took him by surprise.

"I have not yet had the pleasure, but…" Her face turned into a scowl, hinting that she had better not run into him, or else.

Varric, intrigued by the turn of events, leaned in eagerly to take in every detail. "Ah, I believe I have said to much. Besides, I do not even know you."

The dwarf wanted to frown, but he hid his disappointment with his customary grin. He was going to get information out of her one way or another. In order to gain information, he had to resort to his three tactics: ask, bait information, and play with emotional ties.

The first order of business was to put her at ease. "The name is Varric Tethras. Part time adventurer, fulltime storyteller, and sometimes prone to extravagant lies, depending who you are asking." He introduced while bowing.

She considered the dwarf for a moment before answering. "I have heard of you."

"Really?" He pretended to be surprised before continuing his act. "I have not heard of you because I have not gotten a name."

"Solona Amell."

He smirked, knowing that he could easily get her to open up with a particular conversation from Kirkwall. Now it was a simple matter of delivery. He looked at her expectantly to continue, but she continued to carefully regard him. She was not the type the person to spill her secrets. He knew that he would have to resort to tactic number two.

"Wait, are you related to Helena Hawke?" He feigned ignorance.

If Hawke and Solona stood side-by-side, then their resemblance would scream that they were related. Both ladies had the same blue eyes and long black hair. Hawke's face was softer, but Solona appeared somewhat cold. The frown lines that she had received over the years did not help her countenance. In addition, he did research on the Amell family after Hawke became scion, and he knew all about Solona.

"I recently heard of a cousin with that name." She replied rather bored.

Now that she placed the cards on the table, it was his turn to take the gamble. He laughed to try and get her to lower her guard.

"What is funny about my relationships?"

Varric was not going to laugh at her affronted look, but her choice of words was priceless. She did not know how easy she was making this for him. He continued with his tactic.

"How did Curly take to seeing you?" He could see the confusion on her face.

"Who?" She asked annoyed.

"You know the stick–to-the protocol commander, who looks like he needs a hobby?" He teased, so that she would demand information from him.

"I am not sure who you are talking about." He inwardly sighed as he continued to feed her information.

"Cullen." He thought he briefly saw a flicker of something in her eyes. If he was not acutely paying attention, he would have missed it.

"I met the Commander for the first time last night. I am not sure where you are going with this?"

He thought that she was feigning ignorance. He heard about her escapades in the Circle from Anders and rumors about Uldred's rebellion. He sighed, for he had to use tactic number three. He rarely had to implement all three tactics to gain information.

"Your statement is open ended." He began nonchalant. "You said you saw the Commander for the first time, but the first time could be in a time frame of one, five, or ten years. You have a past right? Surely, he would of looked for you as soon as he heard you were here." He shrugged as though it was common knowledge.

"Or the first time," She drawled. "could be the first time making his acquaintance. Would telling you otherwise be what you had hoped, in order to put this in a book of yours?" She countered with a tone of finality.

"I already have good story material." She raised an eyebrow as a challenge to prove her wrong. He cleared his throat to begin his retelling of a certain conversation.

"The templar knight thought about his long lost love as he stared wistfully at the cloudy, blue sky. 'I knew an Amell once.' He began to pour his heart out to his lover's cousin, who had his lover's eyes. 'She was a special woman. Never saw her like again.'" She looked at Varric in disbelief and laughed uncontrollably.

"That sounds so cheesy. I think you need to work on your story some more, dwarf." She finished, wiping a tear from her eye.

"Maybe because it is true." He added comfortingly to get her to lower her guard.

"Right, and I am the Queen of Ferelden." She deflected his information with sarcasm. "I don't know what your sources are, but I think you are a little misguided."

"Then tell me your story of how you became a Grey Warden." In his experience, getting someone to start off comfortingly, usually led people to have loose tongues after a couple of drinks.

"You already got your story from Elissa." She crossed her arms as her eyes started to narrow into slits. He could tell she was truly guarded now.

"Yeah, some bullshit version. If you recall, she was going under an alias, Nocturnal, when she was hiding from Alistair. I am not sure I believe any version she gave me at the time."He fed her the partial truth to put her at ease. Now to feed her with lies. "I mean she was the one who told me that you had a past with Cullen. If this was not the case, you can tell me the truth of your past and how you became a Warden."

"I'll tell you about how I became a Warden, yes, but not today."

"How about your past and relationship with the Commander?"

"What relationship?" She looked at him incredulously. "I think you are delusional."

Varric thought he was pushing his luck a little because she was inadvertently inching towards her sword. The tension of the air was becoming dangerous. If he was not careful, he may lose his head.

"Come, Solona, we are needed in the War Room." The Spymaster interrupted the conversation. Solona looked at Leliana with a blank look before turning her attention back to the dwarf.

"Excuse me, Varric." The mage dismissed him with a glare.

Varric laughed as he looked at the Warden's retreating back. She was playing a mean game of Wicked Grace, but Varric had an ace up his sleeve. He was going to get his story one way or another even if he had to use his stealth skills to get it.

* * *

Member: Solona Amell

Location : Outside the War Room

Status Annoyed

* * *

Solona was already not having a good day. When she woke up, she had expected to be in the confines of Denerim palace. She was brought back to reality when she saw the shabby walls of the hut that was "her quarters". She wanted to be anywhere else other than Haven. Her impression of Haven was already poor, due to the Cult of Andraste. Her ill impression of the place increased as she walked the streets. The refugees looked at her with awe. She could hear brief conversations of people talking about her. She hated recognition and wanted to crawl into a hole somewhere until the Taint took her. In addition, the people ,who she was supposed to be working with, annoyed her. She hated the fact that she had to work with one of the Seekers, who searched for her a little over a year.

She knew that the encounter was inevitable, but to happen so soon? Her mood was fouled since that encounter took place on her first day in Haven. She walked outside to get some fresh air, but she was accosted by a nosy dwarf. The dwarf deserved some credit for his perseverance, but by the end of the conversation she wanted to kill him.

"Are you alright?" Solona's expression softened when she looked at Leliana. The former bard could always tell when something was wrong.

"Do you think the Inquisition would notice if a certain dwarf went missing?" Amell knew her attempt at humor was weak. She could not put her heart into it.

Leliana gave her a small smile as though she understood how she was feeling. "All he wants is a good story."

She knew that Leliana was right. She was not fair to the dwarf, but certain things were better left unsaid. She laughed without humor in confirmation. "A story that is better left untold."

Leliana stopped walking, causing Solona to stop as a result. The Spymaster regarded her carefully before speaking. "What had happened to you both was ten years ago, Solona." She paused for emphasis, allowing Solona a moment to process her words. "You have to let the past go. Talk to him. He needs you now. You-"

"Don't."

Solona did not let Leliana finish that sentence because she knew what Leliana was going to say. Elissa had said something similar to her years ago before that night took place. The Warden closed her eyes as she fought to reign in her emotions. Leliana needed to understand how hard it was for her to do what the bard had suggested.

"It is hard to let the past go when it becomes part of your nightmares."

Suddenly, someone cleared their throat, startling Solona from her musings. Leliana had a sly grin on her face as though she knew how long the Commander was standing there.

"Leliana and…" He paused for a minute before finishing his acknowledgement . "Solona, I hope that you both had a good day."

"Oh, Cullen, it is a beautiful day is it not?"

"It is agreeable." He replied without taking his eyes off Solona.

Was she imagining it or did she see pain in his eyes?

Solona knew she had to be civil. "It is rather pleasant." She replied dryly.

"Come, we have much to talk about at the War Table." Leliana suggested, preventing any awkwardness.

"Shall we?" Cullen opened the door for them, and soon they were joined by Maxwell, Cassandra, and Josephine.

The Herald came in and stood between Cassandra and Solona. He looked at each of his advisors in acknowledgement. "Excellent, now that we are here. I think most of us know we have another addition, but I believe Cassandra you have not met-"

"I spoke with the _Hero_ earlier today." She spat.

Solona wanted to roll her eyes at Cassandra's outburst. She knew Cassandra was acting like a petulant child. She was unwavering in her resolve to not be Inquisitor. She could feel the concerned gaze of Leliana and Cullen directed towards her. She sighed at the imminent questioning later.

"We will start with Solona's report." The Herald began.

"I have contacts for your watch towers. We can get them built with the nobles' help in Redcliffe or with our soldiers. I am sure with the construction, the horse master will join our cause." She spoke with authority from her Commander experience in Amaranthine.

"We have soldiers ready to help with the construction." Cullen offered.

"Wouldn't be better to seek the nobles' help because we are intending on closing the Breach today, yes?" The Antivan advisor suggested.

Solona could not help but agree.

"Josephine makes a rather good point." Maxwell thoughtfully stroked his chin. "We will go her way."

He continued to question Solona. "How about the Grey Wardens?"

"I am going to utilize Blackwall's treaties to gain more men."

"I thought you had Grey Wardens." Cassandra accused.

"I have my Wardens en route to rendezvous in Denerim, awaiting further orders." Amell responded calmly, looking directly into Cassandra's glare unfazed.

"Why are they not here? You know we need the men." It took Solona a little longer to process what Cassandra was saying. She had begun to notice when Cassandra got angry, her accent became more heavy. The Warden was not going to be made a fool of in front of everyone.

"Look, the Inquisition has so many men. Do you know how far Soldier's Peak is from Haven?" The Seeker's blank stare was the response she received. "Anything could happen along the way on their journey to Haven. The Wardens will serve as scouts and will report on any happenings they observe. This way, Leliana could cover more ground with her spies." Solona slammed her fist firmly on the table in anger.

Cassandra relaxed at Amell's outburst, but it did not keep her from narrowing her eyes.

"That is an excellent plan. When I get back, I will let you know what else needs to be done." Trevelyan complimented before directing his attention towards the spymaster.

"Leliana?"

"My scouts report that the area around the Breach is clear. You should be able to close it tonight, provided that the mages are ready." Leliana looked towards Cullen in confirmation.

"The best of the mages are ready, Herald, be certain you are prepared on the assault on the Breach. We cannot know how we will be affected." Cullen confirmed with an air of authority, but Solona was more focused on his hand on his sword's hilt.

He never had this habit of resting his hand on the hilt at all times. It was as though he could easily draw his sword if they were attacked in the War Room. She thought she was only imagining this behavior last night as she observed Cullen from the trees.

It took Amell a moment to snap out of her daydream to get back to the matter at hand. The Inquisition was going to use mages to close the Breach. Excellent, she could get out of this Maker forsaken place at least for a little bit.

"Herald," She could feel everyone's gaze directed towards her. "I am tasked to help the Inquisition in any way I can. I would like to remind you that I am a mage, who is well trained." From a glance she saw Cullen narrow his eyes. _Caught on then, Cullen?_

"Let me be of assistance in closing the Breach." She silently prayed to the Maker that he would let her get out of the Chantry.

"If I may be direct, Herald. Even though Solona is an able mage," _What is he playing at?_ Solona glared at Cullen,causing him to pause for a moment before continuing. "I think you have an ample supply of mages to close the Breach."

Solona felt like strangling Cullen. At first, she did not know whether he was complementing her or doubting her abilities. She then realized that he was keeping her here. She was not a doll to be locked up. She clenched her fists in anger.

She was going to open her mouth in protest until she saw Leliana shake her head.

The Herald looked at Solona thoughtfully, considering her possibilities. "Don't we have soldiers who are wounded?"

 _Well, so much for getting out of Haven_ , she thought dejectedly.

"Yes, Herald." Cullen answered, but Solona could see the small smirk on his lips.

 _That sneaky bastard,_ the mage fumed. She was going to somehow get back at the former Templar.

"As good of a mage you are, your talents are needed here. You are one out of two Inquisition's healers that we have at our disposal."

Amell nodded. "I understand, Lord Trevelyan." She answered with a sigh.

"Excellent, does anyone have anything else to report?" All of the advisors shook their head in negation, earning a satisfied grin from the Herald in return. "Good, I am going to gather my party and close the Breach. Wish me luck!"

Amell heard the War Room's door close before deciding to depart. She did not want to chance being alone with Cullen. She knew she was being childish, but she did not want to deal with him, yet.

"Do you know where the soldiers are?" A familiar accented voice stopped her. She thought she was only imagining things. There was no way that voice could sound gentle. It did not hurt to look.

She wanted to gape when she was staring at Cassandra. "No, I don't."

"Follow me." The Seeker led while her face looked solemn. "I want to apologize for my outburst earlier. It was uncouth of me."

Solona felt like she had to be a better person as well. "I am sorry that I am not who you want me to be."

Cassandra stopped at field filled with wounded soldiers as she regarded Amell. "I can see now that you only want to help and not lead."

The mage wanted to explain herself some more, but the Seeker stopped her. "You don't have to answer." She paused as she looked at the soldiers with a concerned gaze. "These men risk their lives for our cause, earning wounds in the process. For days, they lay in pain, waiting in agony for a healer." She looked at Solona with a hard look before her face softened. "We are lucky to have you."

"Thank you, Cassandra." The Seeker's mouth curved upward slightly into a small smile before leaving the mage to her work.

 _Maybe, I was wrong about the Seeker. We might become friends after all,_ Solona thought as she readied her healing magic to ease the soldiers' pain.

* * *

Member: Solona Amell

Location : Solona's Hut

Status: Scared

* * *

_Solona was standing on a mountain. She watched as an army amassed in the mountain valley under a cloudy night sky. The soldiers were wearing red armor with a sword surrounded by a wreath etched on their breastplates. She could feel foul magic radiating off their armor._

_"What is happening? Why are there Templars?" She continued to walk up the mountaintop until she could see smoke rising to the sky. Her eyes widened with recognition. They were near the Temple of Sacred Ashes._

_"Tonight we take back what is ours." A dark voice broke her out of her reverie. She looked at the tall speaker and could not help but gasp._

_"Is that the Architect? I thought we killed it? No, that Darkspawn looks like the Architect but it is not." She would have recognized the Architect's voice anywhere, but this Darkspawn was more sinister._

_"We will destroy the pretender, and I will show the world the will of Corypheus" The creature exclaimed, as it held an orb to the sky. The templars cheered and raised their swords, praising the creature._

_The Darkspawn waited for the excitement to die down before continuing. "They wallow in their drunkedness celebrating their false victory as we march upon them. Leave no survivors for the Elder One commands it. As soon as the darkspawn finished talking, a skeletal like dragon with dark, purple scales landed in front of her._

"No!" Solona panted as she shot out from the covers. She frantically took in her surroundings and saw that she was in her hut. After healing the soldiers, she was exhausted and must have taken a nap. She covered her face with her hands to try and calm her breathing.

Nightmares of Darkspawn have plagued her dreams for years. This dream was too real to be a nightmare. The talking Darkspawn had managed to dig up an Old God and now they were in the midst of another Blight.

The moonlight crept through the cracks of the hut. In the background, she could hear minstrels playing music, and people yelling for more wine. Was there a party?

She hurriedly sheathed her sword, Spellweaver and opened the cabin door. The cold night air caused her to cringe when it kissed her face. The townspeople were happily dancing and singing.

Some of the partygoers looked at her happily and raised their mug to her in acknowledgement. The adrenaline from her nightmare came back to her in full force. She felt lightheaded and the ground gave way underneath her. As she was falling, she had managed to use her hut for support. Her eyes looked towards the valley where the threat awaits.

"The direction of the party lies that way if I am not mistaken." Her gaze slowly turned to the person who broke her train of thought. The staff on his back was a symbol that he was a mage. He smirked at her with a knowing grin. He probably thought she was drunk.

"I am not drunk." She hoped that the mage would leave her alone.

"You could have fooled me. Are you so imbalanced that you are holding on to this poor building for support?" She remembered Maxwell's description of a Tevinter mage who was full of himself. Well, it did not hurt to guess.

"Dorian, wasn't it?"

"I believe we have not met, yet again it seems my reputation proceeds me."

If they had met under any other circumstances, she would have laughed at his witty charm, but she was more concerned about warning the Inquisition. She was thinking of ignoring the mage and seeking help, but her body refused to move.

Her resolve wavered, and she grabbed the mage's hand. "Dorian, I need to speak with the Herald and any available advisor. It is a matter of great importance." Dorian's cheerful mood fell when Solona beseeched him.

"At once my lady." She thought she must have looked pretty desperate if he acted without question. He bowed and left her with her thoughts.

She closed her eyes tightly, trying to keep her emotions at bay. Her breathing became haggard the more she tried to fight the fear. She was close to hyperventilating, because it was too soon for a Blight. Ferelden was no way near ready to face another one. Alistair was king and Elissa was Maker knows where. In addition, all of their old companions were almost out of the picture. The task of ending this threat fell on her.

"Are…Alright?"

Was someone talking to her? She could not tell. A peculiar sound that did not come from the instruments invaded the back of her mind: A sound that was forgotten about for months.

"I think she is dazed." She heard someone else add, but she needed to figure out the nagging feeling.

"Solona, dear, are you alright?" The Warden's vision came back in focus as she felt someone rubbing her back in comfort.

As soon as her eyes met Leliana's concerned gaze, her eyes widened with realization.

"The Calling." Leliana's gasp caused her to cringe. She gave Leliana a silencing glance as she looked at her companions.

Cullen's expression was unreadable, but he was clutching the hilt of his sword rather tightly. The Herald, on the other hand, appeared grim.

"The Calling? What's this Calling? Is this so important to stop a joyful occasion?" Maxwell asked annoyed.

Solona was taken aback by Trevelyan's foul mood until she saw the rings under his eyes. He had many sleepless nights because he hurried to close the Breach. Tonight was supposed to be his victory, and she felt guilty for spoiling it.

"No, the Calling is not relevant. What is important is that we are all in danger tonight." There was no way she could make them understand without spilling all Grey Warden's secrets.

"How can you be certain? The Breach is closed." The Herald reminded. What she was going to say next would be considered blasphemous.

"I don't think the Breach should have been our primary concern. I think there was something more sinister at bay. I know because- "

She could not finish that statement. Everyone besides Leliana probably thought she was already crazy.

"How did you come across this information?" Cullen stepped forward a little too close for comfort. It was tempting to grab him and cry on his shoulder, but she could not bring herself to make a move after what happened.

"I–Its complicated." The former Templar flinched in response.

"Solona, was it a dream?" Leliana questioned in concern.

"So, we are basing this threat from a nightmare?" The Herald scoffed.

"Look, the only person who understands anything right now is Leliana because we spent a year traveling together. I don't expect the two of you to understand. You can either take my warning or be slaughtered by a templar army commanded by a Darkspawn with a pet Archdemon."

"Maker's breath! Are you sure? Do you know what you are suggesting?" Cullen looked at her in horror.

"Does she look like she is joking, Cullen? She is covered in sweat." Leliana chided.

An unearthly roar echoed across the plain, causing those present to become pale with fear.

"Does that erase your doubts? She took the men's silence as a confirmation." She never would have expected that her life would end like this, especially after the Blight. She looked to the skies considering her options. Haven was likely to be evacuated. She could run away or kill the damn Archdemon, taking it out of the picture before more Darkspawn became involved.

"Whatever you plan to do… I must face the Archdemon alone." She answered with a voice filled with determination. "No one can get in my way."

She leaned into Leliana's hug and could feel tears on her neck. Only the Grey Wardens knew the price of killing an Archdemon. However, in the last Blight Alistair, Elissa, and herself had somehow cheated death. She was sure Leliana suspected that she was not going to come out of this alive. Solona could not help but agree with her.

"Tell Alistair what happened if I don't make it tonight." She whispered into Leliana's ear.

"I will be sure they sing of your sacrifice." She replied with a promise.

She patted Leliana comfortingly on the arm as she felt a lone tear fall on her face. She looked at Cullen and had to stop herself from reaching out to touch his face. Instead, she resorted to smiling at him sadly, causing him to frown in response. She had to be the one to let him go.

"If you all excuse me, I have preparations to make." She briskly walked away with memories reminding her of a night almost ten years ago.

_"Solona, I will not let you make that final blow. You have much to live for. I overheard your conversation with Wynne, discussing your position as Senior Enchanter. You cannot do this." Elissa pleaded in desperation. "The Circle needs you. Cullen needs you-"_

_"Elissa, you know how Cullen feels about me." Solona interrupted._

_She was not going to give up her plan._

_"When you had the argument with him after we saved the tower, he broke_ _down. You did not see him plead after you as you were walking away. He still loves you. Please, don't do this to him._ "

Solona smirked as she thought about recent events and her memories. _If only that was still true, Elissa_.

* * *

Member: Maxwell Trevelyan

Location : In front of the Chantry

Status: Anxious

* * *

"Instead of arguing we need to come up with a plan." The Herald suggested.

"We need to evacuate those who are not able bodied. I will get my men to prepare for the defense and a few who would help evacuate Haven. If Solona's warning is true, then she bought us a considerable amount of time." Cullen offered as he walked away.

Maxwell observed Haven's townspeople gathering their essentials as they lined up single file at the Chantry. Some families were crying in fear. If it was not for Solona's warning, then their exodus would not have been possible. Varric was right when he said that closing the Breach was too easy. The Herald could not help but laugh at the irony. The sound of armor cut his musings short.

"All of Haven has been evacuated, and we can start moving the rest of our troops out of Haven. " Cullen informed with seriousness.

It took roughly one hour to get all of the townspeople out of Haven. "Very good-"

"Ser!" Both men watched as a soldier ran towards their direction.

"Scouts report that there is a large army marching towards us."

"It must be time then." Trevelyan commented. It was time to set their plan in motion.

"Blackwall, Sera, Solas, Cassandra, Vivienne I want you to follow Cullen and get yourselves and his soldiers to safety. The rest of you come with me." The party, who were not told to stay, followed Cullen's men, leaving Maxwell , Varric, Dorian, and the Iron bull behind.

"We have loaded a trebuchet that has a single use." Cullen pointed in its direction. "If you reach it in time, you could stall them." The Commander's eyes then broke contact from the weapon before frantically darting everywhere as though he was looking for someone.

"Herald, a word in private." Maxwell followed the former templar a certain distance away from his party. He looked at the Commander expectantly. Cullen nodded in acknowledgment before speaking with a volume that was almost impossible to be overheard.

"I am not sure where you would be in the fray, but I would like to ask you a favor." The Commander spoke with seriousness, but his eyes betrayed his fear.

"If it is in my power, I would do so."

"If by chance you see Solona in a bind tonight, can you protect her? Tell her about the rendezvous point." He paused and closed his eyes for a moment as though he was in pain. "Just the thought-"

"I understand. You have my word." The Herald interrupted as he heard the commander's voice crack. It was clear that Solona meant a lot to him.

Cullen gave him a small smile of gratitude before barking orders at his men to retreat.

"I knew there was something between those two." Varric chuckled.

"What are you talking about, Varric?" He did not like the grin Varric was giving him. There was something up that dwarf's sleeve.

"Oh, you know Solona's and Cullen's history." Varric replied in a singsong voice.

"Do you mean that flustered mage, who I saw earlier? She is with him?" Dorian chuckled while staring at the Commander's retreating back.

"How can you say they have a history? You don't even know what Cullen said to me in private." The Herald tried protecting Cullen's honor.

"He did say Solona's name with a certain amount of emotion when talking with you. It is obvious he pines for Amell." Varric replied with certainty.

"Okay, Varric, I think you are full of it. Let's drop it. We have more important things to worry about." Maxwell chided, pulling his sword out to face the horde of enemies coming their way.

"By the Maker, is that red Lyrium on their armor?" Dorian could not hide his surprise.

"Perhaps, do you want to be our guest and touch it? I would not suggest it, but it would be nice knowing you if you tried." Varric teased as he shot an explosive arrow at a templar. He had to dodge some of the blood that flew in his direction.

Maxwell did not know why they were bantering in the fight that could lead to their deaths. Perhaps, they knew that they were going to die. Maybe, dying by laughing was not a bad thing.

"I don't know how much longer we can keep this up." Varric observed as they fought through their fifth wave of red templars.

"We have to keep on trying and buy time. If there is an opening, you all can run for it while I stay here and stall them." Trevelyan yelled over his shoulder while dodging a blow aimed for his head.

"No way are we letting you take all of the credit, Boss. Besides, you owe me money. There is not way in the Fade, I am letting you die." The Iron Bull countered with a voice filled with conviction

"Next wave." Dorian warned as he caused some of the dead Templars to come to life.

"That is some creepy magic, Dorian." Varric commented after a dead templar shielded him from an enemy.

"Never seen a necromancer before?" Dorian smirked as he continued to cast magic.

"Once, and it was disturbing back then too." The dwarf shuddered in disgust as he caused the sky to rain arrows with Bianca.

"Okay, I think we have an opening. Cover me while I move this trebuchet." Maxwell commanded as he ran to the object. He had to use his shield to protect himself from stray arrows. Luckily, he did not have to cut down many templars.

"There are too many of them." Varric noted as he reloaded Bianca.

All of a sudden, fifty Templars were impaled by roots that shot up from the ground. The Templars, who were running towards them from the forest, were grabbed and killed by trees that had magically come to life.

Maxwell looked at the source and saw Solona standing on the roof of one of the huts. She nodded in his direction to show that she got his back.

"Who the fuck is that?" The Bull yelled, pulling his broad axe out of a Templar's neck. He swung his axe in an arc to knock down three more Templars.

"She is an ally." Maxwell answered as he impaled a Templar.

"My word! Is that what they are teaching in the Circles these days? I do not want to get on her bad side." Dorian commented as he froze templars with a blizzard spell.

From Varric's arrows, Bull's broad axe, and Dorian's and Solona's magic, they made short work of the enemy forces.

From the distance, a massive figure was flying towards their direction. "Move to the rendezvous point!" the Herald yelled. His companions managed to run ahead of him before a fireball shot at an object in front of him, causing it to burst in flames. The force of the blast knocked him back and he hit his head on the ground.

He painfully opened his eyes, and his vision hazily came back in focus while his ears rang. A tall figure walked menacingly through the flames towards his direction . The creature sneered at him as the Archdemon circled him, watching him intently, ready to attack.

"Hold." The creature calmed the dragon. To be perfectly honest, Trevelyan was more scared of the Archdemon than he was of the talking Darkspawn. He ran to the Darkspawn with his sword and swung wildly. The Blighted monster lazily dodged his thrusts before disappearing.

 _Where did it go?_ He looked around frantically, catching the yellow eyes of the Archdemon smiling at him hungrily.

"Pretender," He heard the monster whisper in his ear. He shivered in fear and could not move. It was as though he was trapped in a magical cage. "You and your ken are like children, whose curiosity leads them into danger. I am here to punish your transgression."

"You think that you can come here and threaten me. Do you think you scare me?" It was an empty threat, considering his circumstance, but he was not going to die appearing weak.

"Ah, words yelled at uncertainty and the unknown. Once, I was like you until I realized that I was foolish. Yet, you do not know who you pretend to be. Now you will know. Exalt the Elder One the will that is Corypheus."

He felt his body become free as he was pushed to the ground with the creature towering over him. When he got up, he was facing the Darkspawn.

"Now kneel," Corypheus pointed his finger in commandment.

"I am not a dog. I am not bowing to you creature!" His eyes frantically looked for his sword.

"Resist then." The Elder One taunted. "It matters not ,for I am here for what is mine." He lifted an orb that glowed red and drew the magic in the Herald's hand towards his direction.

The pain was unbearable as he fell to his knees holding his hand. He was not going to give the monster the satisfaction by gasping in pain.

"The pain was wrought for your meddling. Twas simpler had you died. You stole the anchor's purpose after I toiled for years to enact the perfect ritual. You are a pest for destroying my work to conquer the heavens. The Gall!" The creature accused with his annoying archaic language.

"Tell me what is this thing?" Trevelyan did not know why this mark was important.

"It is meant to bring forth a new God, a certainty." The creature strode forward and picked him up by the arm. His face was level with the creature's face. "For you, the certainty was that you would be in danger as long as you hold the anchor." _Great, I did not even ask for this, yet this monster has it out for me. Solona, a little help would be nice._

"I once breached the Fade in the name of another. A servant to the Old Gods of the empire. I found only chaos and darkness. I waited for a sign. A whisper from the Gods but was met with silence. For a thousand years, I was confused no more. I have returned with my own name. I am a champion of the old Tevinter and a savior to this Blighted world. Pray that I succeed. For I have seen the throne of the gods and it was empty! The anchor is permanant. You have spoiled it with your intervention." Corypheus replied in anger and threw Maxwell into the trebuchet.

The Herald struggled to get up and scrambled to reach his sword.

He held his sword in a defensive position, observing the Darkspawn. From the corner of his eye, he saw Solona materialize on a hill as she unsheathed her sword. Suddenly, a fireball flew into the night sky, signaling to them both that the Inquisition was safe.

"I must begin again and find another way to give the nation and the world the god it requires. Know this you will die." Corypheus stated with certainty.

Maxwell smirked when Solona nodded to him. He could not help but taunt Corypheus. "This is what I love about you psychopaths. Once you talk long enough, you fail to see that the real threat is not in front of you."

Solona made a battle cry as she jumped on the Archdemon, thrusting her blade repeatedly on the dragon's neck.

The Archdemon screeched as it thrashed about in pain. Corypheus screamed in rage shooting a wall of fire at Amell. She yelled in pain as soon as the fire made contact with her, causing her to loose her grip on Spellweaver. The dragon sensed the mage's moment of weakness and tossed her towards the trebuchet. She slowly pushed herself up with her hands gasping in pain.

"Run, I will buy you time!" She yelled with labored breaths as blood dripped from her mouth. She clapped her hands and pushed them towards the ground, causing the earth to tremble and shoot roots out of the ground. The creatures hissed in fury as the roots wrapped around them. The amount of magic she put into the spell caused the mage to collapse.

"If you want to kill me, I am taking you down with me!" Maxwell challenged and cut the trebuchet's handle, causing a rock to hit the mountain peak. The mountain rumbled, indicating that the rock hit its mark. He knew he had a few moments to save them both. He ran to the fallen Warden and supported her weight. He jumped down a nearby pit as the snow avalanched towards their direction. As he was falling, he made sure to cradle Solona as he took the impact of the fall.

He grunted, feeling the pain sear in his back. His joints stiffened in protest as he struggled to get up. Maxwell looked at his unconscious companion and placed two fingers by her neck and counted. _One, Two, Three._ He vaguely felt it but a pulse was still there. He supported her weight over his shoulder and made his way forward.

He was tired and everything hurt. He somehow made his way forward in a trance. It was as though something was giving him the strength to move forward. However, his movement was starting to slow down as he reached the mouth of a valley. The cold and pain was taking a toll. Maybe, he was hallucinating, but there appeared to be three shadows in the distance.

"Thank the Maker, they are alright!" He thought he heard Cullen yell above the cold wind, but surely his mind was playing tricks on him.

He had to know. If only he could move faster. If only he did not fall to the ground. If only his eyes would open. If only it was not dark.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 2 theme playing after Solona's dream : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ill5FycHYG4


	3. Problems at Skyhold

 

* * *

10 years ago

The Night before the Archdemon's demise

* * *

Darkspawn search endlessly for an Archdemon. When they find one, they free themselves from their underground prison and wreak havoc on the surface world. This event is called a Blight. The Blight ends when a Grey Warden kills the Archdemon, in exchange for the Warden's life. Four Blights have passed, and four Wardens have given up their lives so that Thedas could experience periods of peace. The Fifth Blight would have to fall into this cycle of sacrifice. Three Wardens have received the chilling news that one must die. As a result, two of the Wardens had trouble with this information on the night before the Final Battle.

A mage wearing Grey Warden armor was leaning against a wall as she watched servants busying themselves around Arl Eamon's estate. The estate was filled with activity since all the armies that Elissa, Alistair, and herself had gathered were congregating at the castle for tomorrow's battle. The sound of heavy footsteps resonating across the hall stopped her observation of the servants.

"Well, that was a wonderful bedtime story. I was going to have a hard time sleeping as it is, yet this ensures I will not get any sleep." The mage did not like the idea of fighting the large demonic dragon. The fact, that the Warden who kills it dies, was hard medicine to swallow.

The brown haired noble was startled from her melancholy and looked at the mage."S-Solona, I will not let you make the final blow. You have much to live for and…" The Warden paused for a moment thinking of a good argument to convince the mage.

"I overheard your conversation with Wynne discussing your position as Senior Enchanter. You cannot do this."

Amell watched as Elissa closed her dark brown eyes, trying to fight back tears, but her voice was filled with desperation. "The Circle needs you. Cullen needs you-"

"Elissa, you know how Cullen feels about me." Solona interrupted with a frown. The noble was so selfless since she thought of the happiness of others before herself. Cousland was her only best friend. This cherished friendship was the reason she was willing to give up her life for Elissa and Alistair.

"When you had the argument with him after we saved the tower. He broke down. You did not see him plead after you as you were walking away. He still loves you. Please, don't do this to him."

Solona could not help but grimace as she turned her face away, finding the floor interesting. She did not want to be reminded of that particular Templar or his feelings. Now that Elissa reminded her, doubts about her feelings towards him resurfaced. She had to turn the tide of the conversation.

"I could say the same for you. Alistair loves you and he is king. Do you really want the memory of your death weighing on his mind? I should take the final blow." Amell watched as Elissa lowered her head, considering her words. She hoped that Elissa found an ounce of selfishness within her.

"This is why I should take the final blow. I fear if I don't take that blow tomorrow, then he will be a poor king. He will rely on me and he would never remarry."

Solona was not surprised by that answer. No matter the circumstance, Elissa would always look after the welfare of others. The mage tried to get her friend optimistic, so she could distract the noble from thoughts of sacrificing her life.

"If Riordan succeeds, what will you do?"

Elissa adopted a look of resignation as though she had already thought about the answer for some time.

"I will stay away from Ferelden."

Solona's eyes widened in shock. She did not expect that Alistair's rejection would cause Elissa to flee the country, nor did she like the idea of her friend traveling alone.

"Will you stay if I ask, or let me travel with you?"

The noble shook her head in negation and looked at the mage seriously.

"I cannot ask you to travel with me. You will do great things in the Circle. I'll return when you need me, but Ferelden holds too many painful memories. You are my best friend, Solona, and the closest thing I have to a sister. I am very grateful that we were able to travel on this journey together. I will see Alistair tonight to let him know I have no hard feelings."

She walked forward and stared directly into the mage's eyes. "Promise me you will prevent him from making the final blow." The noble beseeched.

"I promise." Solona's promise was that she was going to prevent Alistair and Elissa from taking the final blow.

"Good," Cousland sadly smiled at her friend and placed a hand on Solona's shoulder **.** "You should see Cullen as well. You don't know what may happen tomorrow. It is best to not have any regrets." The Warden gave Solona a comforting squeeze on her shoulder and walked away.

* * *

The air was damp, a clear sign that it had rained earlier in the day. Solona watched as the moon reflected off the rippling water. She wondered if this was a dream that she would wake up from and find herself back at Redcliffe. She reached out her hand and cupped some of water, only to see it fluidly drop back. No this was real. By some ill twist of fate, either herself or her three fellow Wardens were destined to die. She could not help but let out a sad sigh. The boat ride across Lake Calenhad did not seem very long. She got off the boat as soon as she reached the shore and could see the stone and moss accenting the century old Circle tower. As she faced the wooden door, she could not help feel nervous about her imminent confrontation. She debated to turn the boat back around to flee, but her body unwillingly opened the door.

The wooden oak doors creaked open and echoed across the stone room. Amell was surprised that there were no Templars at the gate. She felt dumb when she remembered that they were going to join the three mages in the final battle tomorrow, with the exception of the curly blonde templar praying in the corner. His dark hazel eyes caught hers, and she almost forgot to breathe.

He stiffened when he saw her but acknowledged her presence. "All of the templars and mages have left for the war. There is nothing here but a tower in shambles."

Solona felt like her heart was shattering, looking at his defeated expression. The sorrow in his voice tempted her to run towards him and run her hand through his hair. He looked so broken, and there was no way for her to ease his pain. She wanted to tell him how much he meant to her, but there was something holding her back. Instead, she said the most insensitive thing that came to mind.

"Not all the templars have left." Solona noted as her face softened. She instantly regretted those words. It was not his fault that he was stuck in the tower.

The templar's eyes darkened as though his hope died."Greagoir said that I have been through enough…that I need to recover."

"I am sorry." The mage replied with sincerity. She felt that his entire predicament was her fault. If they had never met, he would not be in pain. He would be a Templar, who did his duty and not some invalid who almost lost his mind.

"You should go." He wearily sighed, nodding his head to the exit. " A great battle awaits you, does it not?"

The voice in her head told her that she should leave since she was overstaying her welcome. There was nothing to gain by standing there. She was torturing them both.

"I was hoping that I run into you, actually." Of course, logic never won.

His gaze softened before turning into a weak glare. "Well, you see me. Leave, there is nothing left for you here."

She cringed as soon as he uttered those words. His words hurt. It was as though the three years they spent together meant nothing.

"It may not mean anything to you anymore, but I always keep my promises. I promised that I would always be here for you."

"I don't need help from a _mage_." He spat out the last word with disdain.

"I know." She smiled sadly. That was all she would ever be was a mage.

"As you kindly reminded, a great battle awaits tomorrow. I want to let you know how much you meant to me." After her admission, she saw him clutch at the Amell amulet around his neck.

"Why should I care?" He forcefully asked until his voice turned to almost a whisper. "You made your feelings perfectly clear."

"You would not be clutching at my amulet around your neck if you did not care for me. I would gladly take it back." She held out her hand expectantly while he continued to clutch the amulet. His grip on the amulet tightened as though he did not want to let it go. Pain filled his eyes as he stared at the offered hand. _Maybe the old Cullen was still present._ Her heart had begun to fill with hope.

"Why did you come tonight, Solona?" He questioned warily, trying to understand Amell's motives. "If you are expecting a love confession, you should leave."

He sounded worn out as though he faced all of life's trials alone. Solona wished she could make it better for him, but alas it was not possible. Even if he did not feel the same way, she wanted to let him know about the impact he made in her life.

"Life is too short to have any regrets. I want to make sure my business is concluded before the battle tomorrow."

She took his silence as permission to continue. "We called each other friends once..." She did not want to remind him of the infatuation they had for each other. That was long gone according to him. "Even if you don't consider me as a friend anymore, you made my life here more bearable. I hope at least one person remembers me when I die, so that my existence meant something in this world."

"You will not die, Solona." The look in his eyes turned to hate as he raised his voice. "You will continue to spread your influence wherever you go!"

She looked at him in confusion because of the word "influence." She realized that he thought she was evil because she was a mage. She regretted that she wasted her time coming here.

"Don't worry, _Templar_. What you know about the Grey Wardens is little. I will tell you that only two of the Grey Wardens will make it out of the battle alive, and it will not be me. You should be happy that the world will have one less _mage_." She spat out, causing him to recoil from the venom laced in her words.

It hurt that he did not know what would happen to her tomorrow. Before she became a Grey Warden, she used to confide in him and he in her. Now, they were like strangers. Regardless, she hated the fact that she still had feelings for the templar.

"Even though it has been almost a year since your hurtful words, I want to let you know that my love for you has not diminished nor will it ever." After her admission, she felt a load lift off her shoulders. She could finally die without any regrets. If she did not leave, she did not think she would be capable of leaving.

"Goodbye, Cullen."

She heard the words echo in her ears as proof that she uttered them. She walked away without looking back. Her heart felt like it was shattering into a million pieces. The mage was halfway to the door when she felt something pull her arm, preventing her departure.

Amell felt her heart race as hope and fear flooded her. Fear was strongest among the emotions because the Cullen in front of her was unpredictable as he held his hands on her shoulders. "Cullen, what-"

The desperation in his eyes stopped her from questioning him.

"Whatever happens tomorrow, promise me that you will make it out alive. " He shook her slightly as though it would prompt her promise.

Solona was starting to feel as though returning to the tower was a mistake because her resolve was starting to waver. The hope he was giving her was false, therefore she had to stay true to her path.

"My decision is final, Cullen. I will die tomorrow so that my friend and her beloved could be together."

"I don't give a damn about your friend and her boyfriend. How can you be selfish?" He questioned through clenched teeth as his eyes narrowed into slits.

Selfish? How was sacrificing her life selfish?

"The people I am dying for will make much more of a difference in Thedas than I ever could."

"Maker, can't you see?" He pleaded for her to understand.

She had trouble understanding because he went from hating her guts for one moment to begging her the next. Did he still have feelings for her? She had to find out.

"You are confusing me, Cullen."

He reached out to touch her cheek and continued his explanation. "If you die, you will leave me all _alone_. _"_ He choked out the last word and Solona could feel tears threatening to fall. Knowing that he loved her would be the best gift the Maker had given her, but she had a sinking feeling that this was all a cruel joke.

"A Templar once told me that he had a duty to oppose everything that I am because he was a Templar and I a mage, or have you forgotten? You had no problems with me dying last year. You had almost wished that I had died at Ostagar." She reminded as she placed a hand on his breastplate, showing him that there was a rift between them.

The templar nodded his head in confirmation. His face scrunched in pain with the memory as he looked away from the mage. "When you found me, I was at my worst. Greagoir is right. I am not fully recovered. It broke my heart when I said those awful things to you, and getting my amulet thrown back at me was the worst possible feeling ever. Moments ago, I thought if I felt indifferent, it would make the pain of rejection hurt less. Can't you see, Solona? I can't bear the thought of loosing you twice."

There was the Cullen she knew. She moved her hand from his chest and cupped the side of his face tentatively to direct his eyes towards hers, but his eyes were cast downwards.

"You aren't going to lose me." She answered while rubbing his cheek in assurance.

He kissed her hand that cradled his face, and he took her hand into his own while he rubbed comforting circles with his thumb on the back of her hand. Solona watched the templar silently, leaving him to his thoughts.

Eventually, he broke the silence.

"Solona, I-" He lost his train of thought as soon as he turned his gaze towards her.

When he looked into her eyes, she saw a flicker of an emotion before he grabbed the side of her face and kissed her passionately. The kiss was fierce as though he was ravenously hungry. She responded to his kiss eagerly, causing her heart to fill with bliss. Their mouths fought for dominance, releasing all their pent up emotions as they panted between each kiss.

He put his forehead against hers, and she felt him fasten a chain on her neck, causing his Templar pendant to rest on her chest. She did not break eye contact when he grabbed her hand and put it over his heart. He did not have to say anything. The gesture was enough to let Solona know how much she meant to him.

"I don't ever want this pendant back. Take it as a promise. When you come back from the final battle, I will renounce my duties as a templar. I will even join the Grey Wardens if that's what it takes for us to be together." He had a look of seriousness on his face, but he was not really looking at her. His eyes were glazed over as if in a dream state. On the other hand, Solona was too infatuated with Cullen's words to realize this fact. This inattention to detail set events in motion that will haunt them ten years later.

* * *

Present day

Member: Cullen Rutherford

Location: Somewhere in a camp

Status: Frustrated

* * *

The Commander of the Inquisition was cold, and he was tired of this endless argument with the other Inquisition advisors. They had been arguing over how to handle the Inquisition for the past several hours. For him, it was a welcome respite since each argument he was stuck in prevented him from thinking of a certain incapacitated mage.

When she arrived with King Alistair, he thought he felt his heart stop. He had yearned to see her again for over ten years, but he had always pictured the reunion with a little more finesse. She would be showered in roses while he was on his knees begging for her forgiveness. Of course, the Maker had a sense of humor making their reunion horrible. He cringed when he remembered pulling his sword at her without a second thought. Now, Solona was another problem he had to deal with along with countless others.

"We can't sit idly while the enemy bolster his forces." He began arguing, in response to Leliana's suggestion of waiting to receive aid.

"Cullen, since you are the only person here with ideas. Why don't you lead?" Josephine accused.

"I have troops to look after." He was going to challenge Josephine to take up the leadership position, but her lack of combat and tactical experience may end up killing them all.

"Since we cannot come to an agreement, there are only two people capable of leading the Inquisition, who are both injured." Josephine reasoned with irritation as she stared at the healer's tents. He did not like the shrewd, calculating look that was reflected in her eyes.

"Never mind, I am going to wake one of them up, and this argument will be settled." Cullen narrowed his eyes and was going to yell at the Antivan diplomat for even suggesting the idea. Thankfully, Leliana grabbed Josephine's arm, stopping the advisor in her tracks.

"We need them. There is no use irritating their inj-" Leliana trailed off before finishing the thought "-ury."

Cullen and the two other advisors looked in the direction that caught Leliana's interest, and his eyes widened in horror. That person should not be up or in this case staggering towards their direction. The snow crunched as the staff punctured its layers from Solona's weight against the staff .

"Isn't that my staff?" A mage approached Amell and angrily pointed at the staff in question.

Her eyes shut. He could imagine the pain she was going through. She should not even be walking. _No attempting to walk,_ he clarified in his head.

The Warden looked at the staff for a second until she brought the staff closer to her body. "It was propped up in the tent. Unless you have a walking stick or something, I need this staff as a loan."

She tossed a gold piece to the mage to pacify him until she was able to give the staff back. One thing about Solona was that she had turned cold. Her experiences had hardened her over the years. He would be lying if he said he was not responsible. His self-deprecation ended when Solona approached.

"Look at you all arguing like a bunch of siblings." The mage mocked with a tease.

"Should you even be walking? They suspected that you broke something."

The Commander became uneasy by the sarcastic grin Solona gave Josephine as a response.

"I coughed up some blood and definitely broke something. Perhaps a rib or two, I am not really sure."

Cullen inwardly pleaded for her to stop talking about how injured she was because he did not know how much his heart could take. He did not need a reminder of his inability to protect her at Haven.

Cassandra rubbed her temple at Solona's ill humor. "All the more reason why you should be resting. You are the Ferelden ambassador. You are no use to us dead." The Seeker wore a frown, but her eyes betrayed her concern.

The mage pushed off the concern with a shrug. "I have been in worst scruples. This takes me back to the fight with the Archdemon during the Blight. I think that one knocked me out too. I guess I have no luck with these things. But I hope you all are arguing about something productive. I am assuming we have a plan, yes?"

"What will you have us do?" Cullen asked in desperation. The Inquisition needed a leader, and there was no one in the camp who was more qualified than Solona.

"Me? Why are you asking me? Are you suggesting that I be the leader?" Solona gawked at Cullen as she laughed without humor. " No, thank you. I have already made my feelings to Cassandra clear. "

"We have worked so hard to build the Inquisition. If we falter, it will crumble." Josephine gestured around the camp to show the mage how many people would be affected from the lack of leadership.

The mage answered Josephine with a stoic look of indifference.

Cullen felt like pulling out his hair, due to Solona's lack of concern to the position. The person, who was perfect to lead the Inquisition, was refusing to adopt the role. He was going to have to resort to begging if needed.

"We cannot act blindly, Solona. It must be you. You are a Hero of Ferelden, and you defended us against another Archdemon. You are more than capable-"

He was interrupted by magic that began to build up in the air. The static from the formation of an electricity spell caused the hair in the back of his neck to stand. The source was the distressed mage in front of him. It was taking all his self-control to not let his templar instincts kick in, or he might loose control like last time. Luckily, Solona had managed to calm her breathing.

"If you all are basing my qualifications of a leader by being a hero, then you are wrong! Ow," She winced when she raised her voice. After a couple of deep breaths, she continued with a lowered voice. "I am proof that heroes fall and need saving. There were too many templars and there was Corypheus. My mana would have depleted before I even fought the Archdemon. I would have died if Maxwell had not been there; hence, we would not be having this argument. Unless you all have a better suggestion, this discussion is over." She hobbled away in a huff.

The Solona that Cullen knew was not unreasonable. He thought she was suffering because she thought she was weak. He was sure that he could get her to see reason if he talked to her.

"I am sure we can convince her if we make her understand. I know that I-"

Leliana placed an arm on his pauldron stopping him from his plotting.

"I value Solona's judgment. I am sure the Maker will provide." She gave him a comforting squeeze on his pauldron as she left and sat down by a tent next to Solona.

He looked around the camp and saw the forlorn looks of the soldiers and the people, who once occupied Haven. The light in their eyes was gone. Never in his life was he in a position where he did not know what to do. He ran a hand through his hair as he felt the stress hit him at full force. What they needed was a miracle.

_Shadows fall_

_And hope has fled._

Mother's Giselle's song cut him out of his musings. He watched as the spark of hope started to fill everyone's eyes. The mother's song provided comfort to his soul in this dark time.

Solona and Leliana smiled at each other and began to sing. When he heard Solona join in the second stanza with Leliana and Mother Giselle as a trio, his heart almost stopped. The soft alto of her voice almost took his breath away. He did not know she could sing or was capable. Perhaps, Leliana taught her during the Blight. He came to realize there were many things he did not know about her since the ten years they parted. He wanted to know the Solona of today.

Eventually, he joined in during the chorus. As he continued to sing, he could not take his eyes off Amell. The Maker somehow allowed them all to survive and answered his personal prayers of bringing her back to him. She had returned to him three times in the past, but duty had always blinded him. He grimaced as he remembered almost killing her in the name of duty. It was his turn to make it up to her. Now that she returned to him a fourth time, he was going to do all within his power to convince her that he still loved her.

* * *

Member: Maxwell Trevelyan

Location: Skyhold

Status: Irritated

* * *

The remodeling of Skyhold had finished splendidly. Every time Maxwell took one step outside of the keep, the scenery and the architecture of Skyhold always filled him with awe. He closed his eyes as he basked in the sun's warmth. The time he had to enjoy such things was little since he became Inquisitor. He thought he had too much responsibility as Herald, but now his tasks had magnified. Ever since Corypheus revealed himself, he had spent much of his time in the War Room coming up with plans to track down the Darkspawn. Not only that, he had to deal with the problem of his missing advisor, Solona.

The mage disappeared after arriving in Skyhold, much to his Commander's dismay. She was becoming very unpredictable, and he was regretting allowing her to join the Inquisition. Cullen's duties were not affected, but he worried about the Templar's mindset because he found out from Cassandra that he quit taking lyrium.

He felt a little jealous of the fact that Cullen put too much faith in Cassandra in handling his problems, instead of telling him personally. Cassandra had a stronger friendship with Cullen than she had with himself. Maxwell hated hearing things second hand, but he feared that the emotional stress of Solona's prolonged absence would catch up to the Commander. He also heard a disturbing rumor that Amell had it out for Blackwall. He did not notice anything personally, but if the rumor was true, she would be a thorn in his side. To prevent disorder, he had to get to the bottom of her actions.

He decided to take The Iron Bull's advice and vent out his frustration on the practice dummies. It felt good to hit something, but soon he became bored when his stationary opponents refused to fight back. He heard someone approach from the stone steps above him.

"It is hard is it not? All of the responsibility." Cassandra greeted as she walked down the stairs.

"One tends not to notice with all of the activity around here." He grunted in response, earning a smirk from the Seeker.

"You never practice." The Seeker observed. It warmed his heart that someone was keeping an eye out for him.

"I want to make sure my blade hand is ready when I face Corypheus again." He twirled his blade and swung at a dummy, serving as a substitute for Corypheus.

She laughed at his antics. "At the speed of your blade you may succeed, but your determination is admirable. I wonder what inspires you to stay focused on one goal."

Maxwell paused thinking for a moment. If the Inquisition failed, then Corypheus would succeed in destroying the world. "I would have to say knowing so much is at stake and…"

His answer was noble, but then he realized that he would never forgive himself if anything happened to Cassandra. She was very brave and even though she was a little rough around the edges, she was beautiful. "even you inspire me. You seem to have the strength to fight while remaining calm in the presence of a difficult situation."

"I-I could say the same for you."

Trevelyan thought he caught her off guard, but she answered with her usual seriousness.

"Regardless of our personal strengths, we must move forward and face this threat head on. I will leave you to your work, Inquisitor." His face turned into a frown as Cassandra walked away. He did not even know if she was flirting with him.

The warrior had tried for weeks to flirt with Cassandra, only to have his efforts thrown back at his face. He wondered whether he should move on and focus on romance after Corypheus was stopped, because he was wasting his energy.

A whistle broke Maxwell from his moping. "I don't envy you. Courting Cassandra is like professing your love to a rock."

"Varric." The Inquisitor greeted annoyed. He was not surprised by the dwarf's arrival. He knew that Varric was going to slight Cassandra in some way.

"I don't mean any disrespect, but to be perfectly honest, I don't think she has a romantic bone in her body." Varric commented in a teasing tone.

"I can't help how I feel about her." Trevelyan answered defensively. He became angry with the dwarf for making fun of his feelings. He knew Varric's disposition towards Cassandra was unfavorable, but he did not want to be reminded.

Varric held his hand up in surrender, knowing he struck a blow to the Inquisitor's ego.

"You don't have to justify your reasons. I am just showing a little concern for my friend. Just know that every time you get rejected, I'll be willing to listen."

"Thanks, Varric." Maxwell replied sarcastically. He appreciated Varric's friendship because he was loyal. The dwarf had supported him from the beginning when demons were pouring from the sky.

"I am always happy to help. Speaking of help, my contact who knows about Corypheus should be here within two days." Varric wore a happy but nervous grin.

Trevelyan wondered what would make Varric nervous, but he would find out eventually.

"I look forward to speaking with your contact. If you would excuse me, I have to meet with my advisors in the War room."

The Inquisitor walked up to the keep and threw open the doors to Josephine's office.

"I guess it's that time again." Josephine acknowledged his presence while finishing her note. She pushed her chair under her desk as she followed him into the War Room.

Leliana was present and he saw Cullen's eyes light up with hope before turning steely. It was a defense mechanism to hide his disappointment. Maxwell suspected that the Commander hoped that Solona would walk through the door.

Trevelyan looked at the sun dais after waiting for fifteen minutes. "Should we wait for Solona?" He questioned as he tapped his fingers on the War table impatiently. He felt like he had asked the same question since her absence.

" _I don't know, she may not come_." Maxwell thought at the same time as Josephine responded. This was her parroted response for that question. It was ridiculous that he had her answer memorized.

"Does anyone know where Solona is?" His curiosity got the best of him. He wanted to know the reasoning behind the mage's prolonged absence. He looked at Leliana for answers because he knew that Amell confided in her.

"I have not seen her since we gathered in the Skyhold throne room." Leliana defended. The same was true for Maxwell because that was three weeks ago.

"She did not tell me anything." Cullen responded with a frown before Trevelyan asked.

"Do you think she quit?" Josephine asked in annoyance. Her annoyance was due to having more work as an ambassador.

"It is not like her to leave without saying anything." Leliana admitted. Maxwell mentally groaned at the thought of organizing a tracking mission on top of dealing with Corypheus.

The door to the War Room flew open, stopping all of the advisors from their ponderings.

"Sorry, did I miss anything?"

The missing mage looked like she traveled to the Void and back. Her hair was all over the place as though she went somewhere windy. In addition, she was covered in dirt and grime. Her spotless armor was charred, and there were indents caused by a mace that once lodged in her armor.

The advisors responded differently to her appearance. Leliana looked like her eyes were going to bulge out. Josephine had trouble closing her mouth. Cullen looked like he was going to have a heart attack.

Maxwell was the first to recover from his shock. "Maker's Breath, where have you been?"

"I was doing my _job_ as the Ferelden ambassador." Amell rolled her eyes at his question, implying what else would she be doing.

"Why did you not tell anyone?" The Inquisitor asked concerned. No ambassador job should be this dangerous. Josephine must have been thinking the same thing because she turned pale.

"All of you were busy at the time, and these matters could not wait." She replied bored while looking at her fingernails.

"What was so important than helping us find Corypheus?" Trevelyan chastised the mage. He was starting to hate her disregard to the Inquisition.

"For starters, one of my tasks was to gain leverage against Corypheus. I am assuming there is no lead to his location or activity." Her smile turned smug when none of the advisors were able to prove her wrong.

"As I suspected, Corypheus is biding his time. My Grey Wardens are now on their way."

Trevelyan rubbed his eyes, unsure of how to handle the news. The mage in front of him was crazy. No person in their right mind would leave with those injuries."So, you flew to Soldier's Peak. Why could you not send a letter, especially in your state?"

"There was nothing about my injuries that a few injury kits could not fix. Skyhold needs a ready supply of them. The merchant swindled me and charged me two gold for two. As for me going personally Soldiers Peak, it's a Grey Warden matter. My journey there was nothing compared to Kirkwall."

"A-Are you saying…" Cullen had trouble articulating his words as his eyes widened in horror. "You were in Kirkwall while it is being invaded?!"

Maxwell almost pitied Cullen because the girl he cared for knowingly put herself in danger. He did not know what happened between them ,but clearly it was unresolved if the mage did not take his feelings towards her into consideration.

"You bet I was. It was grand. I met the Prince of Starkhaven, and he pointed his sword at me and thought I was my cousin. The whole situation was comical."

She cleared her throat and began talking with Starkhaven accent. "I knew you would come back, Hawke, and you will not be able to protect Anders!"

She chuckled to herself and talked normally. "I may have laughed at him and apologized for disappointing him." The Inquisitor learned there was more colors of white than he thought possible as he watched the Commander on the verge of fainting at Amell's choice of words.

"Then we discussed the reason why I came to Kirkwall on behalf of King Alistair. Sebastian had sent a letter the king asking for an alliance. He wanted aid to help him bring down guard Aveline's forces. Here is the same letter Sebastian had wanted me to give the Inquisition. Out of curiosity, I asked him what it would take for him to have a ceasefire. He said he would stop as soon as Ander's associates were brought down."

"We have much to gain from an alliance from Starkhaven." Josephine commented.

Leliana nodded her head in agreement. "We can bolster his forces and cause Aveline to back down."

"Why would you all even suggest helping him?" The mage gave Josephine and Leliana an incredulous look. "This invasion started because he had a childish fit. The person who he wants dead is not in Kirkwall. He is obviously abusing his power. I suggest that we send forces to crush his armies and send his ass back to Starkhaven. I can send a small contingent of Amaranthine soldiers to aid you, so you won't waste your resources."

"I-I agree with Solona. If the Inquisition aids the Prince, then it shows the rest of Thedas that we have poor choice in allies." The Inquisitor looked at Cullen dubiously. He was sure the reason Cullen agreed to Solona's suggestion was for revenge on the Prince.

On the one hand, the prince could provide the Inquisition with resources. On the other hand, the Inquisition would appear weak if it supported someone, who had unnecessary wars because he did not agree with someone's decision.

"Alright, how many troops do you think we need for this endeavor?" Maxwell decided to send the Prince back to Starkhaven.

"Sebastian is not tactful, and he has all his men on one side of Kirkwall catapulting away. In addition, a squad of ten soldiers perform raids on caravans that exit the city." Solona informed.

"I suggest we flank them. Solona's men will take the east side and I'll take the west." Cullen strategized.

"Sounds like a plan. Let me know how many men you need, so I can send a letter to Amaranthine." Solona nodded to the Commander in agreement.

"Good, now that we have -" The Inquisitor was interrupted by hawk that flew into the room screeching.

"Who let the window open?" Maxwell questioned as he rubbed his head. The bird's piercing cries were causing his migraines to form.

The hawk glared at everyone present menacingly as it perched on the mage's arm. Solona absentmindedly stroked the fearsome bird that nuzzled against her cheek as she started to read the message strapped on the bird's leg. Her eyes trailed across the letters until her mouth grew into a smirk.

The mage looked up as she addressed everyone in the War Room. "My Wardens are approaching the gate. If our business is concluded, we can greet them, Inquisitor."

Trevelyan nodded in agreement, allowing the mage to lead him in the direction of her Wardens.

"I had wanted to thank you for saving my life, Inquisitor." Solona thanked him with sincerity.

Maxwell was taken aback because he thought her incapable of gratitude. "Well, you bought us a considerable amount of time. I could not leave you lying there."

Maybe, he misjudged the mage. At first, he thought her cold and disrespectful towards the Inquisition members' opinions and feelings, but she was starting to prove him wrong. This was true when he accused her of being absent due to her selfishness, but she was thinking of the Inquisition the whole time. There were many things he did not know about her, and he was willing to give her a fair chance of being in the Inquisition. His musings were cut short when the mage stopped.

"Ah, here we are. I believe introductions are in order. " Solona beamed with pride as she looked at her Wardens.

Trevelyan watched as her Wardens smiled at first, but their expressions became uneasy when they saw Amell's appearance.

"Commander, what happened to you?" A male Warden with black hair questioned.

"I got into a fight, but everything is fine." The Warden Commander unsuccessfully pacified the Warden's concerns because he was still wearing a frown.

"Inquisitor, this here is Velanna." Amell pointed to an elven mage, who glared at him and muttered something about nobles under her breathe.

"Nathaniel." The Warden nodded in acknowledgement after the introduction.

"Lastly, this is Oghren." The dwarf blew his nose into a handkerchief, causing the elf to glare in response.

"Is that my handkerchief?" Velanna questioned with disdain. The Inquisitor raised an eyebrow at the banter. Solona seemed to recruit interesting people.

"I forgot to wash mine again, hehe. All this mountain air clogs my nose." The dwarf seemed to gesture at nowhere in particular as he continued with a slur. "Now, where is the mead, so I can clear my sinuses?"

"That reminds me." Solona took out a coin purse and tossed it to Maxwell.

"Why are you giving me money?"

"Let's just say that all of your alcohol will disappear because of that dwarf." She gestured to Oghren, who was arguing with the angry elf, causing Nathaniel to smirk in response.

"Why doesn't he go into a tavern?"

"Believe me. If he finds some alcohol lying around, he will drink it like its water. I am taking care of the damages before it comes out of hand." Solona warned the Inquisitor of his impending alcohol shortage.

"Just three Wardens?" Maxwell thought it was odd that she only had three Wardens if she was the Warden Commander. He was expecting at least fifty Wardens.

"For now, I will try and get more since there is an Archdemon in the picture. If you would excuse me, Inquisitor." She looked to her Wardens with her hands behind her back as she spoke with an air of authority. "Make yourselves at home and get familiar with the keep. I want you all in my office tomorrow afternoon."

* * *

Member: Solona Amell

Location : Her office

Status: Busy

* * *

It did not take Solona long to settle into her office since everything was organized on her return to Skyhold. The office location was great because it was the first tower to the right after taking the stairs by the quartermaster. The distance from the tavern was small, allowing her to grab a drink after a stressful day of work. The only downside was that her tower was directly across Cullen's tower. She could imagine a scenario where they both would walk out of their towers at the same time and become engaged in an awkward staring contest. Knowing her luck that was bound to happen.

Speaking of bad luck, she happened to have lost the Joining chalice in Haven. Alistair was going to kill her "if" she broke the news to him. That was the same chalice that Elissa and herself drank from when Duncan made them Grey Wardens. The chalice needed to be replaced if she was going to recruit. She scratched her head as she wondered if the Joining needed a special chalice. If not, she was going to buy one on sale at one of the vendors.

The chalice was not the only thing she lost in Haven. She lost her favorite sword, Spellweaver, but she was able to get another sword upgraded by Wade much to Herren's distress. She loved torturing Herren. He would always great her sarcastically when he was in a good mood or refuse to do business with her. She would always smirk at him when Wade's eyes lit up as though it was his birthday. Her replacement sword was a greatsword, Starfang, crafted from star metal. She did not like the grip, so she replaced it with dragon bone. To Herren's horror, the shop was closed for a week.

She smiled fondly at the memory and sighed as she put the finishing touches on her letter. The only thing she had to worry about was the stupid Calling. Ever since Haven, the sound turned into a persistent hum. She had to resort to sleeping tonics, in order to sleep. She had a feeling that the Calling would end when Corypheus was defeated. If not, Elissa was her only hope for ending it.

Her attention was caught by a faint green glow on her desk emanating from her runestone. Her body tensed at first because her wards were set off, but she relaxed at the color of the glow. The wards indicated that the person had no ill intent, so she did not have to worry. The mage slowly drank her tea as the stranger put a dagger against her throat. Solona's calmly looked at the serpent engraved on the dagger's hilt.

"Solona, you seem to be making many enemies these days." The intruder commented behind Solona's chair without releasing her from his hold.

Her mouth curved upward slightly at his teasing tone. "What can I say? They can't get enough of me. Good to see you, Zevran."

The assassin chuckled as he released her from his hold. "Always a pleasure, mi amiga."

"If you are here personally, I guess the information is important." Solona commented as she crossed her arms. Zevran was a loyal friend. He would not knowingly put himself in danger unless his friend's situation was dire.

The elf's carefree manner turned grim at Solona's observation. "The Wardens approached Alistair. I think a little bird informed them that you were in his court."

Zevran's answer caused Solona to jump up from her seat. She frowned as she began to pace across her office. She began to plot on ways to throw the Wardens off her trail, but she needed to know about her level of danger.

"Do they know I am here?"

"No, but they are looking for you and your loyal Wardens. What did you do to make them come after you?" The Antivan asked as his eyebrows knitted in concern.

She relaxed as she stood by the window behind her desk. She observed the mountains that stood in the distance cradled by the clear blue sky. The sky appeared so serene in contrast to the turmoil within herself.

"I had a question that needed answering about a darkspawn called Corypheus. I could not follow up on it since Elissa wanted me to help Alistair. I had my Grey Wardens look into it when Clarel took over my position. Not long ago, the Wardens started to hear the Calling, and the topic of blood magic became involved. My Wardens defended my honor. Saying Clarel polluted my order..."

Solona gripped the stone window's ledge in anger as she closed her eyes fighting back the emotions. She did not deserve to be called a leader. Her men entrusted her with their lives, and now they were being hunted down like animals.

"I never would have told them if I knew it would put them in danger. They had to pay the price while I was enjoying the luxuries in Denerim."

"You are not a coward, Solona." Zevran tried to knock the mage out of her self-loathing.

The mage scoffed in disbelief. "Am I not? Right now. I am a rat in a hole. Myself and three other Wardens are considered traitors. The only thing keeping Clarel's Wardens away from us is the Inquisition."

Solona became filled with vengeance at Clarel's leadership. Her replacement was resorting to blood magic, which involved human sacrifices. She wondered why the mage would resort to something so sinister. She could not help but vocalize her thoughts.

"I can't help but wonder why she is so protective of the information. This problem started when Corypheus was even mentioned. Why is blood magic the only way of ending future Blights? Where did she even get this information? The truth will come to light. I am sure of it."

"I hope she does not run into you." Zevran commented at Solona's look of hatred.

"I think the encounter is inevitable. When it does, I hope to the Maker that she is not involved with Corypheus. If she is, I will make her answer to all those Wardens she betrayed." Solona looked at Zevran with a dark promise that she was going to make Clarel pay dearly for her actions.

"Speaking of betrayal, I have that information you have asked me to look into." Zevran informed trying to change the topic.

"Oh? Explain away." Her eyes could not hide her interest to Zevran's statement. She was finally able to learn about Blackwall.

"It appears that your Grey Warden friend is indeed questionable. He rarely talks to people in the towns he passes through, and he avoids contact with other Wardens. It is said that the old Blackwall did not sport a beard."

"In other words… he wants to avoid recognition." Solona mused as she rubbed her chin thoughtfully.

"Either he is embarrassed about his looks, or he wants to practice his stealth skills." The elf joked with mirth filled eyes.

"Interesting… I will have to know for sure before I confront him. It appears as though I learn something interesting everyday." Amell had to tread carefully when dealing with Blackwall to avoid suspicion. She did not really think about what she would do in the event he was found a fraud. Maxwell would not like it if she killed Blackwall, which was an appropriate sentence for his crime.

Zevran broke her from her thoughts.

"About your current predicament, would you have joined the Inquisition on your own accord?"

"To be perfectly honest, no. The populace would think I am trying to get more power. Grey Wardens have the power to conscript kings and maybe the Grand Cleric."

She laughed at her next thought. "I bet if I was the Inquisitor, I could have conscripted people to join the Inquisition. No, I did not want to put myself in that position."

"I did not expect an answer so serious. If I had known any better, I would have thought it was to torture the former templar. I remember you were quite the eyesore for him." Zevran teased and laughed at her weak glare. Alistair probably told the elf about Cullen being in the Inquisition.

She thought about how aloof Cullen has been since they were reacquainted. There was no sign that he cared for her. Sure, he was mad about her escapade in Kirkwall, but that was only due to her usefulness to the Inquisition. She confirmed this fact to the elf.

"That was a secondary reason. The feelings, which we once had for each other, do not exist. He made that perfectly clear, even now. I am not the naïve mage as I once was back at the Circle. "

"Brr," he pretended to shiver in response to her blunt statement. "I can feel the cold chill coming from your heart. You have changed. I hope everything resolves itself soon, so you don't have to torture yourself."

"There is nothing to resolve. As of now, we are civil to each other. We have our own responsibilities. There is no sense of opening closed wounds for something that never had existed in the first place. Thank you, for your concern, Zevran."

There was activity behind her office door. Her Wardens were approaching. "Zevran please deliver this letter to the seneschal in Amaranthine **.** You are the only one I trust and capable of ensuring its safe delivery." She gave him the letter and some gold for his troubles.

Zevran never asked questions, which she was glad. The letter was important because it requested a contingent of thirty-five soldiers to assist in driving away Sebastian's troops from Kirkwall. Anyone else delivering the letter would reveal her location with a little bit of gold.

"Give my regards to Leliana and Oghren." Zevran saluted as he jumped out her open window before the Wardens opened the office door.

She stood up an addressed them all properly. "I know you all have barely settled in, but I have a task for you all. " She watched as her Wardens stood in attention, ready to receive orders. "Before leaving Haven, I had to ask a dear friend of mine about a Grey Warden that is supposedly in our ranks."

"Does someone have a dirty little secret?" The dwarf asked in a teasing tone but received questioning looks in response. "No, I guess I have to confess, since no one is speaking up. In case you all are wondering what that smell is, I am sorry." Solona's eyes cringed in disgust of the fact that the dwarf farted.

"Ew, Oghren that was too much information, but that is not what I was hinting at."

"I am sorry about the field that I set on fire. I swear that Shem started it."

"Wait." It took Solona a second to realize what Velanna was admitting. "What… Velanna." Solona chided the elf. She ran hand through her hair in frustration. Velanna had barely been in Skyhold for less than a day, and she was already causing damage.

Amell did not think she could handle any more secrets, so she decided to inform them. "No, this issue is not about any of you. Although, Velanna, you and I are going to have a little talk to discuss your behavior. You all have not met this Grey Warden."

She continued her explanation as she paced with her hands behind her back.

"I thought it was odd that I could not sense the taint. What I am asking each of you to do is to travel one-on-one with him confirming my suspicions."

"Is it Blackwall?"

"Why-y yes, Nathaniel." She could not hide the shock in her voice. She wondered how he was able to guess who was the target. Luckily, she did not have to ask Nathaniel to explain.

"Earlier this morning, I had encountered a messenger who asked if I was a Grey Warden. I assured him that I was and he gave me some missives. He also asked, if you received the missives from yesterday. I asked him about the missives, and he said he gave them to a Grey Warden, who was going to give them to you. Here are the missives."

"How did you come across these missives that are open? " Solona questioned as she began to peruse through the open letters.

"They were in Blackwall's lodge. I did not have Blackwall's name at the time, and I asked people around Skyhold using the messenger's description of him. I was directed to his quarters near the stables."

Solona began to see a common theme between the open letters. They all were related to questions she had asked about Blackwall. Her anger was building the more she continued to read the letters and listening to Nathaniel's report.

"I had wanted to introduce myself to Blackwall, but he was not present. When I saw a letter with a Warden's seal on a table, it caught my interest and I investigated. Come to find out- "

Solona cut off Nathaniel's insinuation.

"Damn it! Now we have some imposter pretending to be a Grey Warden." Nathaniel did not need to tell her that Blackwall was gone. The mage suspected that Blackwall knew she was on to him since he had all her letters. From the corner of her eye, she saw the door to her office open, allowing Trevelyan entry.

"Can we hunt him down? My axe is itching to slaughter something." Oghren pleaded with battle lust filled eyes.

"Is this a bad time? Clearly, I am interrupting something." The Inquisitor commented without humor. Solona could tell that he was angry by the way he was glaring at Oghren. She suspected that he had eavesdropped on the conversation.

"Not at all, Inquisitor. You all are dismissed."

After the Wardens closed the door, she addressed the Inquisitor with a business like tone. "How can I help you?" She calmed her breathing and sat at her desk with her fingers interlaced together in a fold.

"I was wondering what sort of orders you give your men. I have no complaints about how you handle your Grey Wardens, but there are certain people under the Inquisition's jurisdiction that I would like you to bring matters to me."

Solona let the words sink in as she rested her chin on her folded hands. She knew that he was referring to Blackwall, but she decided to feign ignorance. "Sorry, Inquisitor, I am not sure about what and who you are talking about."

"I received a crumpled note from a messenger this morning saying that Blackwall intends to attend the execution of a man called Mornay in Val Royeaux. What was the reasoning behind that?" He questioned.

She wondered why Blackwall would attend an execution of all things, but she may have prompted his actions. "I never gave him the order,but I may have spurred this on by keeping a close eye on Blackwall."

"Why? If there is a problem with my men you should come to me."

"Alas, dear Inquisitor. This is a Grey Warden matter. Your friend is not who he says he is."

"Did he confess to you?"

"No, I have sources that back me up. I was going to confront him but he eluded me."

"I think. I would rather hear Blackwall's side of the story."

Solona wanted to laugh at the Inquisitor's attempt to try and make everyone in his party happy. Maxwell needed a reality check. There was some people who could not be helped.

"He must have his reasons for this façade. I think your judgment would be biased. It is common knowledge that you may have something against him."

"Pray," Amell began trying to control the rage that was building up in her voice. "tell who is your source, Varric?" Solona gripped the armrest of her chair in anger. That dwarf would be the death of her for always getting into her business.

"The matter is closed, Solona. When he returns, all three of us are going to have a little chat. I am sure we can work this out."

Maxwell deflected her question with a tone of finality. Amell could feel the temperature of the room rise up a few degrees. She was on thin ice. Her situation was akin to poking a sleeping lion with a stick. She was pissing off the Inquisitor, but she did not care. She leaned forward glaring at the Inquisitor in a challenge. Maxwell could only protect Blackwall to an extent but not over Grey Warden issues.

"I am so glad you are optimistic, Inquisitor. If he is an imposter, he better hope that I-"

"You are not in any position to judge!" The Inquisitor's face turned red with rage as he menacingly strode towards Solona's desk towering over her with a glare that matched her own."He is under the Inquisition's jurisdiction as are you."

As he yelled, she could feel some of the spittle projecting from his mouth. "Don't you forget. I can ask you to leave at anytime, and if you have a problem with how I handle things around here. You are free to leave. Good day, Solona." Trevelyan fumingly exited her office causing the door to splinter around the hinges, as it slammed shut.

 _This is not over, Inquisitor._ If Blackwall was found, then Solona will make sure he will pay for his crimes.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 3 theme: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XqyX60v5dRI


	4. The Hero vs The Champion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Blackwell is judged. Solas and Solona have a brief discussion of the Fade. Cullen and Solona have a chess match. Maxwell finally confesses to Cassandra. Hawke and Solona have a magic battle.

* * *

Member: Maxwell Trevelyan

Location: Skyhold Prison

Status: Tired

* * *

Trevelyan had to admit that there was never a dull moment in the Inquisition. When he arrived at Val Royeaux, he witnessed Blackwall getting arrested for a crime committed many years ago. He could not find it in his heart to allow Blackwall to die because he came to see him as a friend.

Maxwell spent all his sweat and energy arguing with the guards to free the Warden. Luckily, the Inquisitor's price was only to attend a few more parties. At least, Blackwall would be free after the customary judgment in the morning. Trevelyan wanted to ensure that his companion was fairly treated within the confines of Skyhold's prison. The Commander was going to hear his displeasure if Blackwall was mistreated. His stride came to a halt when he saw a familiar figure standing in front of the holding cell.

"What is she doing here?" Trevelyan hissed at his Commander as he angrily pointed his finger at the mage. "I thought I told no one to inform her."

His blood started to boil at the fact that his soldiers could not follow one simple order. There was a reason he specifically did not want to alert Solona, due to her disposition towards Blackwall.

"Inquisitor, I profess that I do not know how she found out."

Trevelyan felt his eye twitch in anger. All of his actions were to prevent disorder, and he hated it when the balance of order was disrupted. This was partly the reason why he even accepted the Inquisitor position in the first place, in order to put the world back together with his own hands. Now, he had to correct the balance of Skyhold.

"I am stopping this." He was going to chase Solona away before she turned Blackwall into a pile of ashes. There was no way he was going to pass judgment on a box of ashes.

"You aren't what I expected." The mage mused with curiosity.

The Inquisitor stopped his advancement towards the mage. _Let's see how far she will go_ , he thought as he observed the mage. He was poised to pounce on her at any sign of hostility.

She gazed with a hand underneath her chin at the man, who was bowing his head and caged behind a prison cell, like fine art.

The prison was silent leaving those present to their thoughts. Occasionally, the dripping of water could be heard as the droplets made contact with the cold prison floor. The lighting was dim because the torches were slowly dying out from the damp room.

The moonlight seeped through the prison cracks and showed Blackwall's features. His face had splotches of dirt and his hair was matted from sweat.

Eventually, Blackwall took a glance at the griffin emblazoned on her armor. "Ah, the Warden Commander, did the Inquisitor call you to carry out my punishment?" He acknowledged her with a defeated expression. His voice sounded weary as though he was ready for this whole ordeal to be concluded.

Maxwell felt compelled to intervene because Amell was slandering his position if she was giving Blackwall the impression that his fate rested with her. Her next words shocked him.

"Under normal circumstances, impersonating a Grey Warden is punishable by death." Amell educated until her expression turned into distaste. "As the Inquisitor kindly pointed out, I can't touch you while you remain in Skyhold. I was curious to see the person who pretended to be a Grey Warden for so long."

"I will gladly submit to your judgment if that is what it takes to atone." She frowned at his submissiveness.

"I am not sure what to make of your situation. Why did you attend an execution just to be thrown in jail?" The mage questioned as she walked closer to the prison bars. Maxwell found the situation comical because Blackwall was proving Solona wrong. She was so eager to have him killed, but he was not the hardened criminal that she thought he was.

Blackwall spoke with shame as he stared at the floor. "You know I am not a Grey Warden. My name is not Blackwall it is Thom Raineir. I was a captain who got bribed to kill one of Celene's supporters. Of course, there was a cover up and the crime was considered treason." Suddenly, the prisoner got up and strode over to the mage. He stared directly into the mage's eyes grasping the bars hard as he continued his story with fervor.

"My loyal men did not even know that I made them commit treason! They followed my orders blindly and had to pay for my crimes." Maxwell watched Solona grip the prison bar hard with her head hanging down. Something about Blackwall's tale was hitting her hard.

"I attended Mornay's execution so that I could atone." Blackwall finished with a lowered voice, putting his hands over the mage's hand in a desperate plea to believe his story.

From the corner of Maxwell's eye, he saw Cullen shift uncomfortably at Solona's distress.

"Did Blackwall even exist?" The mage whispered as she continued to look on the floor. Trevelyan could not understand Solona's wounded look. What did the Warden say to affect her deeply?

"He was the one who recruited me, but he got killed before I became a Grey Warden. I did not know of any other way, and I took his name and lived up to Warden's values of honor and sacrifice." Blackwall spoke in reverence, thinking of the Grey Warden motto.

"You were misguided at first, but you tried to atone for your actions. That, Blackwall, is honorable. I had you all wrong, and I want to apologize for threatening you in any way." She looked at Blackwall with seriousness, and she nodded her head as if answering a silent question to herself.

"I have a feeling that Maxwell is going to spare your life tomorrow, and I respect his judgment. If you still want to live as Blackwall or want to be a Grey Warden. I offer you an invitation to our order." She said with a promise. Trevelyan was shocked that Solona could see past someone's faults.

"You mean after all this?" The prisoner questioned clearly taken aback, but his voice could not hide his hope. The Inquisitor remembered how much Blackwall wanted to be a Warden. With the real Blackwall's death, he thought that chance was taken away from him.

"It takes great courage, integrity, and sacrifice to do what you did. We would be honored to have you." She said with admiration as she patted the prisoner's hand.

"Come on." Cullen led Maxwell outside of the prison. Moments later, Solona walked out of the prison, oblivious to the two men who were watching her.

"Are you really going to spare that man?" The Commander frowned, not happy at the thought. The Inquisitor remembered that Cullen did not like that the prisoner betrayed his men's trust.

"Yes." Trevelyan would be damned if he spent all of his efforts freeing Blackwall just to kill him.

"I envy that you and Solona are able to see the good in people." Cullen sighed with disapproval as he rubbed his temple with his hands.

"That was unexpected. I thought she was out for blood because she thought him an imposter." Maxwell confessed with bemusement. Solona was a puzzle to him. She would put up one front and act in a completely different manner. He inwardly laughed at the mage's tendency to prove him wrong.

"She was perhaps angry that he pretended to be a Grey Warden, but when she saw the criminal in front of her, something must have changed her view of him."

Cullen spoke about Solona with such adoration that his eyes twinkled. Then it hit the Inquisitor. "You love her."

Maxwell observed Cullen with scrutiny. The Commander looked away, but he could not tell if it was out of shame or embarrassment. If it was the latter, why didn't the Commander say anything? His behavior was unhealthy.

"I saw how the news of her in Kirkwall affected you. Maybe, she has no idea about how you really feel about her. You should tell her." Maxwell suggested. He could see something playing in the Commander's eyes. He had a feeling that the former templar was trying to come up with an excuse. He narrowed his eyes at the thought.

"The Inquisition's forces require my attention." Cullen answered professionally.

If Cullen was going to play the duty card, then Maxwell was going to exert his authority.

"There is no lead on Corypheus so far, and you have helped us tremendously. I am pretty sure that the Inquisition's forces could make due without their Commander for one day. Take a break tomorrow." Maxwell ordered and walked away with a smirk. Sometimes, Trevelyan loved being the Inquisitor.

* * *

Member: Solona Amell

Location: Courtyard

Status:Relaxing

* * *

One thing about the people of Skyhold was their tendency to gossip. Their list of topics ranged from scandalous affairs to the weather. The latest discussion involved a member of the Inquisition, Blackwall.

The retelling of Blackwall's crimes and judgment was misconstrued by so many people that the story itself was ridiculous. Apparently, Blackwall was a poor stable boy and aspired to be a hero. One day, he bought a magical sword that Duke Gaspard coveted. Since Blackwall refused to give up the sword, he was framed and forced to become a Grey Warden, biding his time until he got older. When he revealed Duke Gaspard's wrongdoings, he was arrested in Val Royeaux. The Inquisitor could not bear to see his friend imprisoned and decided to pass judgment, freeing him from his crimes.

Solona laughed that Varric probably created the story. The dwarf tended to portray people he liked as wonderful heroes to be admired. The mage had to admit that she saw a little bit of herself in Blackwall. At first, she thought him a ruffian, who was using the Wardens for personal gain. How he betrayed his men was akin to her betraying her Wardens, but his willingness to atone had changed her opinion of him instantly. All that remained was to prepare for Blackwall's joining. The Darkspawn blood was already obtained since some of the Archdemon's blood from the Fifth Blight was saved. She really needed to get a chalice but that could wait.

She paused to look at a table underneath a cherry tree. The tree offered an ample amount of shade and blocked out most of the sun. The spot would have to do since it was secluded. She was not antisocial, but sometimes she wanted a little time to herself.

Taking out a chessboard, she arranged the pieces and began playing. Chess was a favorite pastime of hers in the Circle. The amount of logic and strategy involved engaged her mind, and it was relaxing in a sense.

"You are the Hero of Ferelden." A voice acknowledged as she moved to grab her first piece.

 _Sweet Andraste!_ She wanted to curse at the interruption. There was no way possible someone could see her underneath the tree.

"Hero, is probably what I am going to be referred as the rest of my life. If we are going with introductions, then I prefer to go by Solona." She acknowledged in annoyance. As she lifted her head, she saw a bald elf wearing a brown tunic. She could not tell his age, but she guessed he was older than her by the tone of his voice. He was looking at her curiously, as though trying to judge her.

"Solas." The elf greeted.

"Pleasure. What can I do for you, Solas?" Her greeting was not amicable but forced as she watched the elf sit uninvited in the chair in front of her.

"I heard you have been present among the Inquisition, but we have yet to talk." Solas offered her a small polite smile.

She wanted to mentally groan at this statement. She looked at her chessboard with a pout. It was not likely she was going to play her game, without appearing rude. She was glad that the elf did not look at her with awe like the people in Skyhold, who found out she was a hero. She respected him a little for his behavior.

"Would you like to talk about anything in particular? " She questioned as she played with a pawn between her fingers.

"I was interested in why you joined the Inquisition. Clearly, being a Grey Warden is more exciting." She did not like the look she was getting from him. It was like he was dissecting her, trying to figure her out.

"Exciting is an understatement. King Alistair wanted to offer help to Inquisition and thought I was able to help." She did not like revealing information to people she did not know.

"I can't wait till this threat is dealt with. I can sleep better at night knowing that demons won't plague the land. The Maker knows that us mages get tempted in the Fade by demons." She admitted genuinely, bringing her teacup to her mouth. The world was already screwed up with Darkspawn. Demons running around made matters worse.

"Demons are misunderstood." He informed with disapproval to her comment.

She almost spit out her tea in response to his statement.

"Misunderstood?" She drawled, making sure she had heard correctly. There was no misunderstanding of a demon's intentions.

"Demons try and kill people. They feed off the weaks' fears and emotions. I don't see how we are able to coexist with such creatures. The Fade is necessary to keep our world and their world separate." She did not hide her skeptical look from the elf. The people of Thedas never failed to surprise her in making ridiculous statements.

"You have a poor opinion of the Fade since you have seen a narrow piece." The elf nodded, convincing himself that he figured her out. Solona hated when people thought they understood her. _I swear if he continues with his monotone voice, I am going to fall asleep_ , she thought with droopy eyes.

"I have traveled in the depths of the Fade and watched as hosts of spirits clash to reenact battles long forgotten."

"Battles?" She repeated to bring herself back to the conversation since she spaced out. The conversation was getting weird. She was a sane person, but the words sprouting out of this elf's mouth was hurting her sanity.

"Any building that has existed throughout the ages has a history. Every battlefield is filled with emotions and death. Both attract spirits. They press against the Veil weakening the barrier between our worlds. When I dream of such places, I go deep into the Fade. I can find memories no other living being has seen." Solas sported a nostalgic smile of a distant memory. He actually believed this nonsense he was sprouting.

Something was definitely off about this elf, but she could not put her finger on it.

"So let me get this straight. You go to an ancient ruin, fall asleep, and _poof_! You can see a reenactment of history. Okay, what is the Fade to you, exactly?"

Amell was pretty sure that they weren't thinking of the same Fade. The Fade she knew was a dangerous playgrounds for demons. She wanted to look at the sky and ask the Maker what did she do in her life to deserve such punishment? She could not handle crazy talk, and the elf would qualify as crazy if he continued to give her such answers.

"This world, or its memory is reflected in the Fade. Dream in ancient ruins and you will see a city lost in history."

She almost scoffed at his answer. He did not even answer her question, and she suspected that he did not even know what he was talking about. She was going to prove him a fraud. When she did, victory would be sweet.

"You mentioned battlefields. Tell me of one." She probed as she sat up straight from her chair, bracing herself for his answer.

"I dreamt at Ostagar. I saw a field filled with darkspawn killing soldiers with such brutality, but the Ferelden warriors fought with valor. I saw Alistair and the two Heroes of Ferelden light the signal fire…and Loghain's infamous betrayal of Cailans forces-"

"That sounds like something that gets regurgitated from Varric's stories." Solona shot down the elf before he finished his tale. Solas was full of himself if he thought he was special. To Solona, he stole tales and pretended to witness the events himself in the Fade.

"Maybe your mind is clouded because you witnessed the events yourself. In the Fade, I see reflections created by spirits, who react to the emotions of the warriors." The elf smirked at her skepticism.

"Are you saying that the emotions are real?" She was starting to hate these circular conversations. Why could he not accept that he was wrong, instead of justifying everything?

"It is the Fade they are all real. My travels have taken me to Amaranthine, and I saw the ancient Fortress, Vigil's Keep."

 _What is he playing at?_ Solona narrowed her eyes at the elf as her shoulders tensed. He was baiting her this whole time, and she hated the fact that she fell into his trap.

"So…" She took a deep breath trying to hide her surprise. "you went a little sightseeing at my Arling. I don't see how this relates to the Fade." She challenged, crossing her arms over her chest defensively. She put up a strong front, but she was a little spooked.

"I witnessed the fortress overrun with Darkspawn with a party of two Grey Wardens and two recruits fighting for their lives. One of the recruits suffered a blow to the head during the fray." He paused gauging her reaction.

Solona's eyes grew wide in shock. Only six people knew what happened that night, and Solas was definitely not one of them. Maybe she was overreacting, and he was talking about something else.

"Is that all to your story?" The mage leaned forward from her seat as she placed both hands on the table to brace herself. She was willing to play his game, and she steeled her emotions to pretend she was not affected by his story.

"The Hero of Ferelden got separated while the other two party members were left to fend for themselves."

Her mind drifted to the event and reenacted what happened. She remembered all the yelling, fire, and killing. She had to get the elf to stop talking.

"The mage Warden and the recruit became overwhelmed by Darkspawn-"

The Warden had enough and slammed her fist on the table, causing the chess pieces to topple over. She closed her eyes to calm her breathing. She had to admit that she walked into this situation. Her pride at trying to prove this mage wrong had backfired.

"What brought you to Vigil's Keep in the first place?" She asked slowly, trying to change the subject. Her blood had become cold like ice, and dread flooded her body as Solas recounted the tale. How he came across that information was not natural.

"Ten years ago, the Warden Commander chose to save the City of Amaranthine and built a fortress so strong able to withstand the Darkspawn invasion. Naturally, I wanted to witness the battles in Amaranthine, so I traveled to the Arling."

"How is it possible for you to see such things? I thought nothing in the Fade is real. I don't know whether I find this interesting or unsettling." Solona rubbed her temples, trying to come to terms with what she had heard. Footsteps echoing across the cobblestone walkway caused her to look up. For the first time in Skyhold, she was glad to see the Inquisitor.

"Hello, Inquisitor." She greeted cheerfully. She wondered how Maxwell was able to see them, but she saw Solas's chair was sticking out in plain sight.

"Greetings, Solona." Trevelyan greeted cordially with a smile. Solona was taken aback because she thought he did not like her. "Sorry, to interrupt your game, but I need Solas's help with a matter for Cole."

"By all means, you all have fun. Thank you for the talk, Solas." The mage chirped with relief. For the first time in her life, she was glad to get rid of someone.

Solas's brief retelling of Vigil's keep was opening a closed wound. Of course, she had nightmares from time to time of the event, but she was able to pass it off as a dream. Hearing the tale while she was awake was awful.

Heavy footsteps were approaching her direction. Solona looked at the source of the noise and saw Cullen with his heavy mail armor. _Does he ever take that thing off_? Solona chided herself at such thoughts. She lost that right to care for his well-being long ago.

"Are you by y-yourself?" He asked cautiously as he shifted uncomfortably in his armor, gauging her reaction. Did he sound nervous?

True, this was perhaps the first time they were alone since Vigil's Keep ten years ago. He had changed over the years. Long gone were his boyish looks, which were replaced with a thinner more chiseled face. His blonde hair was lighter and his dark hazel eyes reflected one of a stern commander.

She looked at the empty seat in front of her to stop her from inappropriately staring. "Unfortunately, my partner left." She replied sarcastically. Her response allowed her the opportunity to leave if the situation became awkward.

"Are you finished playing for the day?"

Cullen was not stupid. His question implied that he got the hint. "If not, m-may I join you?" The expression in his eyes was hopeful." She remembered how much he fancied chess. He was a serious person, and his seriousness prevented him from pursuing leisure activities. This was perhaps his only free moment that he allowed himself, and she was shocked that he wanted to spend his time with her.

Saying "yes" would give him permission to ask any questions he wanted, which frightened her. Saying "no", would imply that she had a problem with him. The latter option was tempting. She was not a cruel person to hurt his feelings intentionally. The problem was how to act around him since they were different people.

"Certainly, clear the board." The mage invited as she stared at the chess pieces. She heard the chair pull back, allowing Cullen to take his place on the opposite side of her.

The only sounds were of the grass rustling in the wind and occasional birds that flew by. She watched as he arranged the chess pieces where she was positioned on white, allowing her to move first. They silently played, and she could not help but steal a glance at him. His brow was knitted in concentration as his eyes stared at the pieces with an intent glance. He must have felt her gaze on him because he looked up. His eyes caught hers and they shared a shy glance before quickly looking away from each other. Clearly, he was not the only one who was nervous.

Many years ago, Cullen and Amell were able to speak freely with each other. She hated to think of the past, but she always considered him a friend. What was happening now was ridiculous. She could not stand the silence and decided to make small talk. "This takes me back…you know to the Circle. If I recall, you were only ahead of me one game if we are still keeping track."

The former Templar relaxed at the breach of silence as he considered her words. She broke the ice and the Maker only knew the outcome of this interaction.

"No," he began as he looked towards the sky in thought. "if I recall, the last game was a stalemate." He reminded jovially with a fond grin.

"I thought you were supposed to be a gentleman." Solona pouted, pretending to be offended.

"Not when it comes to chess." The corner of his mouth was upturned almost cheeky. Solona had to admit that he had turned bolder over the years. Usually, when she acted offended he would be quick to apologize.

"I guess you do have some room to be smug. You were my best opponent in the Circle. Poor Jowan kept on challenging you to rematches, but you would beat him within minutes." She sighed as she remembered the mage once imprisoned in Redcliffe. "What was Neria Surana's punishment for aiding Jowan's escape?"

"You know about his escape?" He looked at her with shock.

"Yes, I encountered him during the Blight."

"Did you know he was a blood mage?" His eyes darkened at the thought. Solona was not surprised by his reaction. She knew that Cullen hated blood mages.

"I did not know about that part." She replied genuinely with a frown. His suggestion of using blood magic to save Connor made sense now. She did not want to go that route, because she did not want to turn him into a blood mage. No wonder Jowan laughed at her when she told him. He was a blood mage.

"According to Greagoir, Neria Surana helped him destroy his phylactery, and he used blood magic to escape. Sadly, she was prisoned in Aeonar with Jowan's lover." Cullen informed with seriousness as he moved his knight across the board in an L position.

"Lover?" She questioned with interest as she moved her queen to take his knight. Jowan was rather promiscuous, and she did not think he was the type of person to settle down.

"A chantry initiate." Cullen clarified as he took Solona's pawn with his rook.

"How scandalous. I feel sorry for Neria. Why is it that all the excitement happens in Circle after I leave?" Amell teased. The Circle did get crazy after she left.

Cullen pretended to think for a moment. "I would not call it exciting. Greagoir thought it was too boring without you wreaking havoc." He reminded, but his eyes were filled with mirth.

"How long did it take for all the purple dye to come out of his hair?" Solona laughed at the memory. The Knight Commander was very serious, and she could not resist causing pranks to lighten up the atmosphere.

"It was a few weeks. He took away some of the Templar privileges for those who dared make fun of him." He answered, crossing his arms over his chest.

As innocent as the conversations were, the humor was starting to leaver her. She wanted to move topics away from the Circle, because she did not want to bring up uncomfortable topics.

"I remember you had a sister, Mia, if I am not mistaken. Have you seen her or your family since the Blight?" Solona questioned as she moved her king away from check.

"You remembered." He admitted in disbelief. He looked at her with pain in his eyes, and she had to look away.

What was wrong with her question? She did not think the question was harmful.

"Did you expect me to forget?" She laughed and shook her head in disbelief that he thought her heartless. His face flushed pink from the accusation as he toyed with the queen in his hand.

"W-Well I-" He sputtered and cleared his throat. "Not many know about my familial ties, except for those close to me." The look he was giving her was unsettling. He was looking at her with such an intensity that it made her cheeks burn from embarrassment.

"I did not mean to pry, I was just concerned for an old friend." She apologized as she moved one of her pieces. She had wanted to check up on him, but clearly he thought that they were not friends.

He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "Maker's breath, please forgive me. I did not mean to imply that we weren't friends. I know they moved from Honnleath, but I need to contact them and let them know that I am alright." He answered in a rush.

"You should. They will be happy that you are safe." She agreed, ignoring his flustered look.

"So, when did you become Warden Commander?" He probed, but she could tell he was anxious by the way he readjusted his gauntlet.

"The night Alistair arrived with the Templar." She answered with a scowl. Her mood dampened at the thought of having to talk about what happened that night.

"You mean that Elissa left that same night? Where did she go?"

"Does the name Nocturnal ring a bell?" Amell felt compelled to laugh as his eyes widened in recognition.

"That hooded warrior was her? No wonder she hated me. How did she end up as Queen?" His brow furrowed in confusion.

When Elissa fled to Kirkwall, Solona did not even know. Elissa left Solona a note renouncing the Warden Commander position and informed Solona that she was leaving to clear her head. Six years passed by with no lead of Elissa's whereabouts, until Amell received a note from Anders.

"No distance is large enough to separate her and Alistair. Once he found her location, he returned to her." She mused, remembering Elissa's and Alistair's relationship.

She remembered how in love her friends were. In his moments of weakness, Alistair broke Elissa's heart twice. The king became distraught after her disappearance and acted once he found her. Amell was happy that her two friends reconciled, but she was jealous that Alistair was willing to forsake his duty to marry for the crown to pursue Elissa.

Amell could see hesitation in the Commander's eyes. She suspected that he knew how she was feeling but could not find the right words to comfort her.

"Solona, I could have-"

"Cullen, there is no use lingering over past regrets." She dismissed his consolation or admittance, earning a reproachful look from her partner. She had learned not to look to deeply into Cullen's actions because she misinterpreted them.

"I overheard you talking to Leliana at the Chantry in Haven. I know you are trying to pretend that nothing has happened between us, but you are affected with nightmares. We have to talk about what happened. " He pleaded as he placed a gauntleted hand over hers.

 _Why could he not let the past go?_ She thought, staring at the hand in confusion. She could not trust herself to talk about the past after her encounter with Solas. If the talk happened, she would have to have a level head. Even if they did talk, what will that solve? There were no merits in digging up the ashes of their dark past. The nightmares served as a reminder of how naïve she was, and she hated herself since that day.

"We will, but not today. I have come to terms with what had happened that night. To be perfectly honest, I did not expect to run into you." She confessed. She did not miss the heartbroken look that took over his features.

"Do you regret…seeing me again?" He asked timidly. His eyes locked on hers in an earnest gaze. He wanted her to tell him the truth.

"No, I never had a problem. I thought my presence here would bother you, so I kept my distance."

"Why would you…" He was offended at the thought until realization dawned on his face. "I see now. I left you with that impression." He finished with self-loathing laced in his voice. His hands were clenched in a fist as he stared at the chess board.

"Cullen, can we please talk about this some other time and enjoy each other's company like old times?" She offered, trying to change the subject. This conversation was only hurting them.

Her request was not the right one. She could see how his mouth was open in protest, poised to argue. He was not done with the conversation by the way his shoulders tensed.

"Of course, forgive me." He conceded to her demand as he moved to grab his rook.

She saw the slight twitch of his hand. The motion was faint but it was noticeable. Ten years ago, he exhibited the same symptoms of lyrium withdrawal.

She took his pawn with her bishop, earning a sly grin from the former Templar. She cursed herself because she could see in two moves her king will be checkmated.

His knight took her pawn putting her king in check. _He'll have that small victory,_ she supposed, but she was more worried about the effects that the withdrawal had on him. Cullen was an introvert, and she suspected that he did not boast his problems. He gave his all to whatever job he had, and this Commander position meant the world to him. She will be dammed if she let his lyrium addiction take the position away from him.

"Checkmate milady." Cullen's smug voice cut her from her ponderings. She saw the lighthearted smile directed towards her. Despite the awkward conversation, she realized that she missed talking to him.

"I missed this. It has been a while since I had a good game of chess."

She saw the panic reflected in his eyes as he tried to come up with a response. "This does not have to be the only game we play together." He gestured to the chessboard for emphasis before shifting it nervously. "That is if…You know-"

"I would like that, but only when we are not busy of course." She agreed with a small smile, saving him from embarrassment. Cullen still had that cute habit of having trouble putting his thoughts together when he wanted something.

"She really said that," He commented wistfully with a faraway look in his eye. She suspected that comment was one of his thoughts voiced out loud and not directed towards her.

Amell got out of her chair. The legs scraped against the cobblestone as they got pushed back "After all, luck has favored you today. Don't expect to be so lucky next time. I don't want Varric to put in his stories that I am a poor chess player." She challenged in a lighthearted tone.

"It has indeed" Cullen sat calmly, legs crossed fingertips touching, smirking at the turns of events. Solona had a feeling that the smirk was not due to him winning the chess match.

* * *

Member: Helena Hawke

Location: Solona's Office

Status: Excited

* * *

Hawke was impressed when she saw Skyhold. The keep was filled with happy workers, who did not stare at strangers. Not many people knew who she was which she was grateful since she did not want to be reminded about the events in Kirkwall. She thought the fighting was over after she left Kirkwall to prevent an Exalted March. To her surprise, Varric contacted her to meet the Inquisitor in order to discuss Corypheus. How the Darkspawn survived was beyond her understanding. She remembered the charred corpse, but hearing that it was still alive bothered her. Corypheus was a threat, but the Inquisitor needed a few days to prepare for Crestwood. Varric thought that taking her to see her cousin would cheer her up.

Hawke could not hide her excitement to meet a new family member, especially a Hero of Ferelden. Varric opened the office door to allow them entry. Hawke's eyes scanned the office noticing the bookshelves, weapon racks, and runes. She recognized some of the runes because her father had the same ones.

"You are a mage!" Hawke cheerfully observed. The stories told of two Heroes of Ferelden. One was a warrior and the other a mage. She was happy that her cousin was a mage since she was able to relate.

"I believe introductions start with names instead of accusations, but yes," The cousin sighed as she finished scribbling down a note before looking up. Her head tilted sideways in curiosity until her face showed recognition. "…I am a mage, Solona Amell. You must be Helena Hawke." Amell acknowledged.

"The one and only." Hawke bowed, causing Solona to shake her head before her eyes narrowed on Varric.

"Hello, Varric." Solona greeted the dwarf as her arms crossed over her chest in annoyance. "You never come to my office unless to pester me about stories. I am sure you are not here to only introduce my cousin to me."

"Elementa, you wound me." Varric put a hand over his heart, pretending to be offended.

"Varric, she figured you out." Hawke mocked. She wanted to laugh at her cousin's attitude. She heard from Varric that her cousin would not reveal any information about her past, no matter how hard he tried.

"I see how it is. The Amell relatives love to pick on the dwarf." He pouted, earning a laugh from Hawke.

Helena decided to answer her cousin's observation. She hoped that her cousin would agree because she was bored.

"Varric, you walked yourself right into that one. Yes, you are correct, Solona. Varric is under the impression that I am better at magic than you are." Hawke taunted, earning a displeased look from Amell.

"If you think, Varric, that I am going to take part in a childish rivalry then you are mistaken." Solona scoffed at the suggestion.

"Wow, Varric, you are right she is serious, like Cullen. Yep, they are perfect for each other." Helena noted in response.

Hawke's cousin and her were polar opposites. She was more laid back while Solona was uptight. She wondered if her cousin would allow her to get to know her.

"You still wont let that go, dwarf?" The cousin glared at Varric at the mention of Cullen's name.

"I'll let it go after you tell me your story." Varric offered.

"Not happening today." Amell dismissed his remark.

"You have to relent at one point, cousin. If he becomes impatient, he'll get his story one way or another." Hawke warned as she scratched her head in nervousness.

Varric would do anything to get a story. He would even resort to breaking in Solona's office if he was desperate enough. From the look in his eye, he probably would break into her office.

"He can come and try." Solona dared as her hand tightened on her quill.

"Ah, that sounds like a challenge. See, this is why you should duel Hawke. I'll make it interesting." Varric bartered as he leaned in front of Solona's desk.

"Commander-" Nathaniel Howe paused at the door with a dwarf behind him. He looked uneasy at the thought of interrupting the talk. "Sorry, is this a bad time?"

Varric smiled at the interruption. Helena knew that Varric found a way to manipulate her cousin to agree.

"Not at all. Your Commander just agreed to participate in a duel, so I can treat you all at the tavern afterwards." Varric lied, causing Solona's jaw to clench in anger at Varric's audacity for trapping her.

"Is that true Commander?" Nathaniel looked at Solona in awe. Solona's frown softened at Nathaniel's hopeful look. Helena was sure that her cousin had a soft spot for her Wardens.

"Yes…Nathaniel." Solona relented with a sigh.

"I knew that you would watch out for old Oghren. That's why I'll always have your back." Oghren smiled, causing Solona's eyes to light up with mischief.

"Oghren, this means you can get whatever you want till you can't drink any more, and it should be covered. Right, Varric?" Solona questioned Varric with a wicked grin.

"Of course." Varric appeared unfazed, but Solona eyes twinkled with mirth as though she knew something that Varric didn't.

Footsteps were coming up the stairs near the battlements. All those present were curious to see who was approaching. A woman wearing black armor with an eye emblazoned on her breastplate approached Solona's office. Hawke watched as Varric tensed when he saw the lady.

"Solona, I-" The lady looked up from her file to address Solona, but the intruders eyes went from Hawke to Solona and back again. Her eyes grew into slits when they honed in on Varric.

"You lying piece of shit!" The woman yelled as she lunged to grab Varric, causing Solona to jump out of her chair. Varric dodged, causing the woman to bump into a bookcase allowing Varric to escape out the door. The woman scrambled to get up as she ran after the dwarf.

All those present in the room stood by the door, watching the retreating figures of Varric and the woman. They all stared at each other in confusion.

"What was all that about?" Helena questioned. Varric may have many friends, but he also had many enemies.

"I am not sure, but he got Cassandra angry. I've never seen Varric run that fast." Solona mused with a shrug.

* * *

Member: Maxwell Trevelyan

Location: Courtyard

Status: Shocked

* * *

Trevelyan stretched as he thought that the meeting with Hawke went well. She was a little too sarcastic for his taste, but he believed her to be a valuable ally. Word had gotten out that there was a bad storm in Ferelden. He did not want to risk any of his companions getting hurt, so he decided postpone the visit to Crestwood for a few days.

He was on his way to pick up an amulet for Cole when he heard the yelling. He had to strain his ears, but he thought he heard Cassandra and Varric arguing. He wondered why until he realized that Cassandra must have found out about Hawke. He swore as he headed towards that direction.

The yelling became more pronounced as he reached the Courtyard. He made it to the archway when Cassandra picked up a sack of flour and threw it at Varric. The dwarf dodged as his eyes frantically looked for a place to escape. The sack of flour tore open as it made contact with the ground, causing its contents to fly in the air.

"Wait till I get my hands on you, and I will wring your little neck!" Cassandra snarled as she picked up a pot with her shoulders arched back, readying her projectile.

"What did you expect me to do?" He panted in exasperation as he pointed an accusatory finger at the Seeker. "Your people broke into my house, chained me, and forced me to answer your questions for hours. There was nothing friendly about your visit. I did not want to subject Hawke to that same sort of treatment." Cassandra was not satisfied by that answer and tossed the pot. The dwarf ducked as the object whistled over his head.

The objects she was throwing at Varric were almost as big as him. Maxwell did not know how much damage a dwarf could take, but he had to stop the fight before anyone got hurt.

"Stop It!" He intervened, standing between Varric and Cassandra. He started to cough from the flour that was still in the air.

Cassandra became affronted when Maxwell intervened. The grass crunched as she angrily strode forward. "Do you feel sorry for the Dwarf and you are taking his side? His tongue is full of deceit and he will tell you whatever-"

"I said stop!" The Inquisitor interrupted as he closed his eyes in anger. He knew that Cassandra was upset, but Varric had his reasons. Killing each other would solve nothing.

"He knew where Hawke was when we needed her most. She could have prevented the Breach from happening. She could be leading us." Cassandra accused as her shoulders sunk in dejection.

"You could say the same for Solona Amell, but the Inquisition has a leader." Varric pointed at Maxwell to emphasize his point.

"Varric is not responsible for anything that happened at the Conclave. We need to work together." Maxwell glared at Varric to show the dwarf his seriousness. "I swear Varric, if you are keeping anything else from us-"

"Fine, I am sorry." Varric sulkily agreed at not being able to keep secrets, but Cassandra continued to glare at the dwarf.

Maxwell sighed and decided to get rid of Varric to console Cassandra.

"Please leave, Varric." Maxwell watched as Varric left before sitting next to Cassandra on the stone steps. "Talk to me, Cassandra." He soothed while rubbing her back. Seeing her in pain hurt him, and he wanted to share her burdens.

The Seeker glared at the grass as she spoke with self-deprecation. "I feel as though all of this is my fault. If I was more forthright and proactive in saying why we needed Hawke, none of this would of happened."

She looked at the sky, imagining the events happening differently with Hawke as leader. Eventually, she turned her gaze to Maxwell. "We would not have needed you. I cannot wallow in regret. I feel like such a fool."

Maxwell knew better than to take her words personally because she was upset. He was willing to shoulder her burdens if she let him.

He moved to grab one of her hands in his and gave it a gentle squeeze. "Regardless of how you feel about yourself, Cassandra, I care for you."

She removed her hand from his and stood up leaving him to sit on the steps.

"What are you playing at this is a serious matter?" She angrily chided as she moved away to distance herself from him. She thought he was toying with her, but he had to make her understand.

"Do you think I am not being serious?" He questioned angrily as he looked with conviction. "The words I have said to you are truthful. You have become very dear to me." He answered with gentleness as he stood up on the step.

"What you intend to do is impossible and it should have been obvious to you." She reminded as her hand lifted in the air to gesture around Skyhold.

"How is it obvious and impossible?" He looked at her with disbelief before reasoning with her."All I know is that I am a man, who has feelings for the woman in front of me. I fail to see the logic. Why is it impossible to court you unless…" Maybe he was fooling himself into believing that she cared for him. "you don't fell the same way?"

"You cannot be _serious_. " Her accent had trouble saying the last word. He could not help but wonder whether she was trying to talk herself out of her feelings. "You are the Inquisitor. Your position is too important than spending your time with frivolous romance." She reasoned as her hard gaze softened.

"You did not answer my question." He countered with a tease. His sullen mood was filled with hope. _Tell me you don't feel the same way_ , he inwardly pleaded to Cassandra to answer his question.

Cassandra gave him an unreadable look before dismissing him. "Goodbye, Inquisitor."

He was not going to give up until she told him that she did not feel the same way. _Why did being the Inquisitor make things so complicated_ , he thought as he knocked on the door to Solona's office.

He waited before hearing a faint, "Come in" on the other side of the door. He opened the door allowing him access into her office. The mage took in his appearance as her eyes narrowed in concern.

"Here is the amulet you wanted for Cole." She held out the amulet for him to take, and he was grateful that she was not the type to pry into his business.

"Thank you, Solona. Have a good day." He was ready to leave until she stopped him.

"Inquisitor, are you by chance going to stop by Cullen's office?" She asked hopeful. He could not help but raise an eyebrow at her question.

"I was on my way, why?"

"I have a potion that he needs to take."

"Why can't you give him the potion yourself?" He questioned, causing his eyes to narrow in disapproval. He did not want to get in the middle of whatever was going on between them. If she wanted to give something to the Commander, she should do it herself.

"I have a quick meeting with my Wardens before I have that unplanned battle with my cousin. I am afraid that with all the excitement, I will forget to give it to him."

"You actually agreed to that?" He asked taken aback. She was not the type of person who would agree to something so childish. He did not think she was capable of having fun.

"Unwillingly, Varric tricked me. That's okay though. He does not understand that us Wardens can hold our liquor. Oghren is going to run him dry." She answered amused.

"What is this potion for?" He gestured to the vial on her desk.

Solona got up from her desk carrying an amulet with her. "Has Cullen talked to you about his lyrium withdrawal?" She questioned, toying with the amulet with a templar emblem.

"How did you know?" His brow started to become moist with perspiration. He swore to not inform anyone of Cullen's condition. He was a person of integrity, and he knew he did not tell Solona.

"I have training as a spirit healer, and I know the symptoms. Cullen without lyrium is not pretty. I thought the Inquisition had ample resources to supply lyrium. Why is your Commander going through withdrawals?" She questioned with a glare.

 _Great, she thinks I told Cullen to stop taking Lyrium_ , he mentally groaned. Having the ire of two women in one day was only possible with his luck.

"We do, but he is insistent on not taking lyrium." Trevelyan defended pointing towards Cullen's office for emphasis.

"So, he decides one day to quit taking lyrium?" She questioned with displeasure as she moved to pick up the potion. "This potion is to prevent that _idiot_ from dying. He will take this potion for a period of thirty days to allow him to overcome the effects of lyrium."

"What exactly is in this potion?" He accepted the vial and saw the potion had a green hue in the light.

"Elfroot and Spindleweed, embrium and… lyrium."She drawled as she recited each ingredient off with her fingers.

"Lyrium?! How will adding lyrium help him overcome his addiction?" Cullen was not going to be happy if he found out lyrium was in this potion. Personally, Trevelyan thought his decision to stop taking lyrium was admirable but somewhat stupid. Thirty days was not a long time, and his Commander would be healthy.

"Elfroot and spindleweed when combined detox the body from a foreign substance, and embrium acts as a deterrent from taking certain substances." Solona educated as she stared at the amulet.

"A deterrent?" Maxwell asked confused, causing Solona to grab an apple on her desk.

"Suppose you have an apple, such as this one that is sour." She bit into the apple before continuing. "If you dislike sour apples, would you bite out of the same apple?"

"No, but wouldn't embrium be considered the foreign substance?" Maxwell reasoned. The potion could backfire badly, if Solona did not know what she was doing.

"That is a good question." She complimented with approval. "The answer is no, because it has been proven that all three herbs work in synergy with each other. The foreign substance in this case is lyrium. I have to start the potions with a steady supply of lyrium. Each potion thereafter will have a decrease in the amount of lyrium, so that he will overcome the withdrawal."

"How in Thedas do you know how to make potions?" The mage clearly thought this all out, and he did not know that she was skilled.

"I am a master herbalist because of the Blight. I will check on Cullen tomorrow to see how the potion worked." She answered as she opened her desk drawer. She placed the amulet over a book and locked the drawer with her key.

Maxwell wondered why she kept the amulet and not wear it. He was glad that she was not avoiding Cullen because he would have made her deliver the potion if that was the case.

"Shouldn't you wait till after a couple of potions before checking on Cullen?" He questioned. It made more sense to check the effects after a series of potions.

"His stages are progressing at a high rate and requires a potent potion. I made a potion that maybe appropriate for his body weight. " She informed as she folded her hands over her desk.

"Maybe appropriate? That is not reassuring." He commented with a frown.

"I did not want to overestimate. Overestimating will be stressful to his body. The detox rate will be so high that it could put him into shock. Underestimating, would give him a headache… in the worst case scenario." She reasoned with apprehension.

"If you are sure…" He was not even sure Solona was convinced of the potion's effects, but he knew that she was not going to intentionally poison Cullen.

* * *

Trevelyan stood in front of Cullen's office and knocked but received no answer. He looked at the potion in his hand and thought he could leave the potion on the desk if he left a note. He opened the Commander's office door and saw Cullen engrossed in a chess game with himself. The Commander was oblivious to the Inquisitor's presence. The sight was amusing but Trevelyan wanted to see Cullen caught off guard.

"Are you practicing chess by yourself?" Maxwell pretended to scold his Commander.

"Inquisitor!" Cullen jumped out of his desk, causing the pieces to topple over. The Commander's face flushed pink in embarrassment as he stared at the pieces guiltily.

"Relax, I don't care what you do in your spare time as long as your work gets done." Maxwell informed with seriousness. It would not kill Cullen to loosen up every once and a while.

Maxwell remembered Solona was playing chess when he retrieved Solas. He wondered if Cullen played with her that day. If so, Cullen's antics were funny if he was preparing to play against Solona.

"Is that how you intend on courting her, playing your way into her heart?" Trevelyan teased. He wanted to know how the situation between the mage would be resolved.

"No, I can't court her yet. We have yet to talk. She is afraid of me I think." The former templar answered with a frown as he picked up the chess pieces that fell on the floor.

"I don't think so she made this potion to help with your withdrawal." Trevelyan consoled the distraught Commander. He hoped that Cullen would not ask for the ingredients to the potion. He did not think he was capable of lying.

Cullen gingerly took the offered position from the Inquisitor's hand. "Did you tell her?" The Commander accused with distrust.

"No, she noticed." Trevelyan reassured.

"I did not want her to see me like this." Cullen sighed as he uncorked the stopper and calmly downed the potion. If Maxwell was in Cullen's position, he would have asked about the potion before pouring it down his throat. The Commander probably trusted Solona with his life.

"Why not?" Maxwell was confused. Why keep the withdrawal secret if she knew about his history. Cullen needed someone to support him.

"This whole rift between her and I was partly because of lyrium. She is probably so disgusted by the fact that she refused to deliver the potion to me herself." The Commander informed as he glared at the bottle. Trevelyan thought that the potion's vial was going to break under Cullen's grip when he told his story.

"I stopped by her office, and I was on the way to see you. Don't worry. She said she was going to check up on you tomorrow. She is not avoiding you." Trevelyan reassured and saw hope fill the Commander's eyes.

He hesitated to give Cullen the next news. "If you are done for the day, you probably should watch the sparring match in the training grounds. It... might interest you." Trevelyan walked away before he could be questioned further. Cullen would murder him for allowing the match to take place.

* * *

Member: Cullen Rutherford

Location: Training ground

Status: Concerned

* * *

The training ground was loud with the people of Skyhold cheering. Cullen did not know what possessed him to come down to watch the sparring match. He rubbed his head, trying to sooth the horrible migraine he obtained after drinking the potion. He felt hundreds of eyes on him, and he saw that his soldiers were giving him fearful looks. His soldiers knew they were guilty because Skyhold could be invaded in the next few minutes, and he would not know. He was going to put them back to work. He strode angrily to his men until he saw Solona with an unsheathed greatsword facing Helena with a staff.

 _Oh No_ , he thought with fear. The sparring match was between the two cousins. He could be wrong, but he needed someone to assure him. From the corner of his eyes, he saw a light brown ponytail sticking up in the distance. He had to stand a little on his toes to see Varric in the crowd.

"Hi, Curly. Did you come to watch to show?" Varric smiled at Cullen nervously before turning his attention to his ledger.

"Varric, please tell me what exactly am I looking at? Cullen narrowed his eyes at the dwarf. He had a feeling Varric was involved in Solona's predicament.

"This is not what a Hero or the Champion should be doing." Cassandra informed in distaste. Cullen thought it was strange that there was extra distance between Cassandra and the Inquisitor.

"I think it is good for morale. To take everyone's mind off the threat." Trevelyan crossed his arms with a smirk.

Cullen did not find anything funny about the Inquisitor's words. Magic battles could get very dangerous, and the Commander was going to be out for blood if one of the mages got hurt.

"Why did I even agree to do this again?" Solona yelled at Hawke over the crowd.

"Varric can be very persuasive." Hawke reminded,causing Cullen to turn his attention to the dwarf.

"Varric, if one of them gets hurt… I swear you are going to regret meeting me." His tone promised pain, which Varric smiled sheepishly in response.

Solona pointed her sword at Hawke, which gleamed in the sunlight. "Just because you are my cousin, don't expect me to go easy on you. After all, I have a reputation to uphold." Solona smirked as she held the greatsword with one hand over her shoulder.

"I would hope not if you did, I would say you were getting old." Solona's eye twitched as Hawke propped her staff on the ground with the bladed end facing towards the sky.

"There is only a three year age gap between us!" Solona fumed.

"My we are causing a scene." Hawke chided with a laugh.

Cullen heard a scratching noise, akin to an infestation of rats scratching against floorboard. The Commander turned his gaze to the source and saw Varric religiously scratching down notes with a quill in his book

"Seriously, Varric, are you copying this down? You are already making money out of the bets you are taking for this fight. " Cullen chided.

"Oh, come on, Curly. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity. Are you sure you do not want to bet? The pot is 8:3 in Solona's favor." Varric offered in a business like tone as he showed the Commander the pot. The pot glittered with coin as the sun's rays made contact with the metal.

Cullen looked away and remembered his values." I do not gamble." He dismissed the dwarf, crossing his arms defensively.

Varric on the other hands was not going to give up. He was insistent on breaking Cullen's resolve.

"Think of it this way. You would be able to buy her a nice wedding ring after you both kiss and make up. After she wins, of course." Varric suggested with a smug grin as he took a gold piece from a soldier.

"I don't know how that's any of your business dwarf." Cullen glared at the dwarf for prying.

He had to admit. The idea was enticing. He had already sinned enough, and he was damned anyway. "This stays between us, Varric." Cullen threatened as he shoved ten gold in the dwarf's direction.

"I wouldn't dream of it." Varric assured with a sly grin, causing Cullen to grunt in disapproval. He was anxious for this fight to get over with. He remembered Hawke was flashy and relentless with her spells. Solona would be at a disadvantage if she ran out of mana because she did not have a staff.

"This sparring match was made on the request of Helena Hawke ,Champion of Kirkwall, and Solona Amell, Hero of Ferelden. The use of magic is allowed in this match. The match is called by the person who surrenders and begins with my signal."

As soon as Fiona shot a fireball from her hand, Solona started running towards Hawke with her greatsword trailing behind her with one hand.

"I thought she would be on the defensive." Trevelyan commented with a concerned look.

 _Solona, use a barrier spell or something_ , Cullen pleaded as Solona continued to run.

"She is unpredictable and bold! This is my kind of fight." Bull leaned forward in his seat in excitement.

Hawke stared in surprise before using her staff to shoot fireballs, trying to stop her cousin's advancement. Solona used her sword to bat some of them away, causing some of the fireballs to char the ground. Hawke continued her relentless assault, forcing Solona to erect a barrier to protect her from the stray projectiles.

Amell's sword sung in the air as she swung in a downward arc, causing Hawke to dodge. The greatsword caused the ground to shake across the battlefield as it made impact on the ground where the Champion was moments ago.

"Why did she do that? She is wide open to a counter attack!" The Iron Bull yelled ,spilling some of the mead he was drinking in the process. He was clearly into the fight."

Cullen could only hopelessly watch as Helena noticed her advantage and tried knocking Solona in the back with her staff. Before the staff made contact, Amell turned into a swarm of bees and materialized on the other side of the battleground. He realized Solona's tactic was to keep her cousin on one side of the battlefield.

"Did you see that?! She turned into bees. Friggin bees. I wonder if she could fit into a jar?" Sera pointed her hands at Solona excitedly.

Solona twirled her sword in the air, causing the sky to rain fireballs. The impact of the fire on Hawke's ice wall sounded like hail hitting metal. A ring of fire surrounded Hawke, and the intensity of the flames caused her hair to fly wildly in the wind. Amell ceased the spell when her cousin's shield looked like it was going to collapse.

"I never knew that magic battles could be so dangerous. Does it scare you that she has so much power?" Trevelyan questioned in awe.

"At one point in my life, it would have." Cullen confessed. He could remember a time when the Circle was overrun. He hated all mages even Solona. He became filled with shame. Overtime, his hatred was unwarranted, and he clenched his fist as he remembered the lost time between them because of his prejudice. _When I see Solona I don't see a mage. I see the woman I fell in love with long ago,_ he reminded himself.

"Okay, cousin, I hope you are in for a shock." Varric almost facepalmed at Hawke's pun. The Commander had to agree that the joke was cheesy.

Hawke held her staff between her eyes as she slammed the butt of her staff to the ground. The air began to crackle with electricity, and Cullen felt the hair on his arms start to stand up as an electrical storm started to build up. The electricity snaked its way towards the Warden's direction. The spell was fast and there was no way that she could dodge.

Cullen had to close his eyes as the electricity made contact with Solona. When the crowd gasped, he opened his eyes and saw that Hawke's smirk fell as Solona protected herself in a dome of rock.

"Solona, got Hawke riled up." Varric observed. Cullen could see the look of determination on Hawke's face. She had a feral grin as she held her hand back ready to strike.

Hawke threw a fireball at Solona, and Solona drew her hand back to counter with a ball of ice. Steam flew across the battlefield as the spells made contact, but the two mages did not wait for the steam to dissipate as they continued their relentless casting.

Hawke twirled her staff in the air and swung down the staff in an arc. A fist of stone flew in Solona's direction. Solona put two fingers on her forehead, and she blasted the rock back with a telekinetic blast. The force of the blast caused the stone to ricochet. The observers dodged the projectile while screaming.

"I am going to land a blow on you at some point." The Champion taunted. She closed her right hand in a fist and pushed her palm out towards Solona's direction, causing Amell to frown.

The Warden closed her eyes and became transparent as she became enveloped in a shroud. Seconds later, Hawke's spell manifested as a crater below her.

"Wouldn't that spell kill her?!" Cullen asked Varric in horror. She almost got crushed to dust in front of their eyes.

"No, it would have knocked her out. That was the toned down version." Varric reassured.

"Toned down are you kidding? There is a hole on the ground!" Cullen was almost yelling and drawing attention to himself. This fight was starting to become violent.

"You are too cocky, Helena. The battle is mine." Solona pierced her greatsword to the ground. The ground rumbled as roots tethered around Hawke's limbs, forcing Hawke into a kneeling position.

"Why didn't she do that in the first place? I know I would have." Dorian chuckled as he clapped with the crowd's cheering. Cullen wanted to agree with Dorian, but he did not want to fuel the mage's ego.

"I think she wanted her cousin to have some fun…until she got bored." Cullen sighed as the adrenaline was starting to leave his body. Solona was going to be the death of him.

Solona calmly walked towards Hawke. "Are you alright there, Hawke?" Amell crouched down on her knees to be eyelevel with her cousin. "I promise I will let you go if you yield." Solona's smirk caused Hawke to pout.

"I yield." Helena sighed in defeat as Solona cut her from her bindings.

"That was not bad, Hawke." Solona complimented, offering a hand to help her cousin up.

"Whoa cousin, you can shapeshift. Can you turn into a dragon?!" Hawke's question caused Varric to heartily laugh.

"After all that, that was the first thing you ask me." Solona laughed. "No, I can't, but I can teach you shapeshifting after Corypheus is dealt with."

"I would like that." Hawke replied with a smile, accepting Solona's offered hand.

"I think that turned out good. None of them were injured. Don't you agree, Curly?" Varric's cheeky grin normally would have caused Cullen to be angry, but he was happy that the cousins were not injured.

"Whatever, Varric." Cullen pretended to scowl. The dwarf laughed as he gave the former templar thirty gold.

"Ah, so that is how you intend to pay for my Wardens' feast tonight. " Solona observed, staring at the betting pot.

"What can I say? I am a businessman. You did good, Elementa." Varric answered with a shrug.

The Warden rolled her eyes at the dwarf before her eyes darted to Cullen. He felt his breath hitch in his throat when she smiled at him. She walked forward towards his direction. She was about two feet away until she staggered. His face turned into horror as she fell to her knees clutching her ears.

"What is wrong with her?" Trevelyan questioned as he kneeled beside Cullen and Solona.

"Solona? What's wrong." Cullen could not stand the look of pain on her face as he held her.

"No… make it stop. I don't want to-" Her hands tightened on Cullen's arm in a death grip. Please... It wants me to sleep." She gasped as Treveylan's left hand glowed green.

"What just happened?" Trevelyan asked, looking at his hand in confusion.

"I think during the battle she tore open the Veil and attracted a spirit." Solas walked forward as the butt of his staff hit the ground. "This same spirit is tied to the mark and you, Inquisitor." Solas theorized as he pointed to the Inquisitor's hand.

"Did you see what just happened? Nothing sounds friendly about this spirit." Cullen was on the verge of panicking as he helplessly stared at the passed out mage in his arms.

"Don't be too presumptuous." Solas chided at the suggestion that the spirit was a demon. "Whether it is friend or foe that remains to be seen. I am going to keep a close eye on her. These sort of things pass by quickly, and she should be fine tomorrow." The mage consoled.

Solas's answer was not reassuring. He could not stand the thought of a demon playing in Solona's mind.

"We should not take any chances. There are mages who can enter the Fade and see what manner of spirit this is. I am not going to stand idly while she is prone to possession." Cullen stepped forward in protest.

"Solas, prevented my mark from spreading. I trust his judgment. Everything is going to be alright, Cullen." Trevelyan rested a hand over Cullen's pauldron to comfort him. For some reason, the Inquisitor's words were not reassuring. **  
**

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 4 theme (Time) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yQ1eHQiTGWc


	5. Love and Regrets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Solona does not realize that she is in danger. Cassandra and Solona have a growing friendship as they contemplate their feelings for their respective love interests. This chapter also looks into Cullen's and Solona's past in a little more detail.

* * *

Member: Solona Amell

Location: Solona's Office

Status: Tired

* * *

Solona woke up not feeling at all rested. Usually, the nightmares she was gifted with after becoming a Warden was to thank. Nightmares did not play a role in her current predicament. Frowning, she looked around her surroundings and saw that she was in the bed above her office space. How she got into her bed was beyond her. The last thing she remembered was the sparring match with her cousin. That did not bode well for Hawke, now did it? Former Champion of Kirkwall losing to the Hero of Ferelden. The mage felt a little guilty on behalf of her cousin, but Varric was to blame for her cousin's loss.

 _Varric!_ Solona shot out of bed when she remembered the dwarf.

This was a once in a lifetime opportunity, and there was no way she was going to miss watching him treat her Wardens. His wallet was going to have a hole at the end of the night. Her body felt heavy, and when she looked down she was wearing her Grey Warden armor.

I _must have fallen asleep wearing it_ , she thought with a shrug.

Walking outside, she looked at the Skyhold courtyard and found it oddly deserted. The sight would not have been so concerning if it was not for the absence of patrol soldiers on the battlements. A green hue from the night sky reflected off a puddle on the ground.

 _Something is not right._ Solona had a sudden feeling of foreboding wash over her. Her feeling of dread became stronger when she noticed that the walls of the battlements flickered.

Suddenly, the scenery of the courtyard began to dissolve and in its absence, she was surrounded by rock, and the sky was a dark misty green. The Black City could be seen in the distance. Somehow, she was trapped in the Fade.

Her options were to find a way to get out of her predicament or wake herself up. The latter was the easier option, and she closed her eyes to force herself to wake up but when she opened them, she was still in the Fade. Whatever was manipulating this _dream_ and keeping her asleep was powerful. Her eyes widened at the thought.

 _What is going on?_ The gravel crunched underneath her feet as she took a step back in fear.

"Ah, I have a stranger in my realm." A guttural voice echoed across the plains of the Fade.

After the voice spoke, she had to clamp her ears as a song invaded her mind. Her attempt at trying to block out the sound was futile and unbearable. The Calling was more pronounced and louder than she thought possible. There was no way she was going to wait to see what manner of demon awaited her. Clenching her jaw in pain, she made her way forward, looking for a way out.

"Come on. Don't be shy. Show me your fear." The demon taunted, sounding quite pleased with itself. The tone of its voice implied that it was toying with her.

 _A fear demon._ She supposed. Never in her studies or traveling experience had she encountered such a creature before, and she did not want to make this her first encounter.

Fear would feed it, and she would have to make sure not to give it any possible ammunition to use against her. Don't _give it what it wants._ She emptied her mind, breaking out into a run.

"You cannot hide your fear. Not here." The demon laughed at her attempt to clear her mind.

She frowned when she heard the pattering of thousands of feet climbing up the sides of the rock she was running on. Shaking her head at the sound, her heart started to beat faster as the speed of her run quickened.

Her feet skidded to a halt as she saw the sources of the sound. Hundreds of tiny pincers were visible as the creatures showed their hairy bodies. Her blood had turned ice cold as she was face to face with spiders. Morrigan's favorite form was a spider, and she chased Solona around the camp in that form to force her to shapeshift while she was teaching her. The witch even greeted her with that form when she woke up. Solona had a horrible fear of spiders ever since.

 _Calm down._ She had to be level headed, in order to use her magic. She tried summoning her magic from the Fade but could not feel its power. Her magic was not working, and she did not have a sword to defend herself. To be at the mercy of such creatures was a thought she could not fathom, and her brow started to break into a sweat. Helplessness was a feeling she thought she put behind her. The demon was going to have to try harder than that to get to her.

 _I am going to kick that demon's ass when I find it,_ She swore.

Of course, the demon decided to conveniently laugh after her thought, fueling the mage's anger against it.

One of the spiders managed to climb onto her in her moment of distraction. She screamed and slammed herself against the nearest stone pillar she could find. Her body felt free, and she took off in a path that was free of spiders. Time had lost all meaning the more she continued to run. She did not dare to look over her shoulders, for she knew the infernal creatures were still chasing her since she could hear the sound of their pincers snapping close from behind her.

The momentum of her run slowed as she was approaching a massive figure in the distance before coming to a halt when she was staring at the biggest spider she had ever seen. Her whole body froze in fear as the spider crawled towards her with its pincers clicking. All thousand of its compound eyes were looking at her as its massive body menacingly strode forward.

"We finally meet." A malevolent voice spoke from behind her.

Suddenly, she was engulfed in a white light, and she had to close her eyes from its radiance. When she opened her eyes, she was staring at a stone ceiling. Turning to her side, she saw her runestone on her nightstand. She was in her room.

 _What kind of dream was that?_ She thought, removing the handkerchief off her nightstand to blot the sweat from her brow.

After rubbing the sleep from her eyes, she a took a deep breath and got up. A sudden urge to throw up became prominent when she saw she was wearing her armor. _Maker, please let me be in Skyhold_ , she inwardly prayed, running to the door which would reveal the truth. She threw her office door open and walked outside, feeling the nip of the morning air which caused her to shiver in response. Closing her eyes, she relished the feel of something real on her skin. This was a small comfort compared to what she had just experienced. The sun had barely broken through the clouds. Most of Skyhold was probably still sleeping, except for the soldiers. She walked down the stairs of the courtyard to clear her mind when she saw the black armor of Cassandra.

"Good morning, Solona." Cassandra greeted with a small smile while holding some books. Her brow was furrowed with concern when she took in the Warden's appearance. "Are you alright, you look like you have not slept?"

"Oh, I slept but not peacefully." Solona answered sarcastically with a yawn, but she was glad to see a familiar face.

"We were worried since you were talking about something was causing you to sleep." The Seeker informed, earning a confused look from the mage.

"Did I?" The mage questioned with a frown, not remembering the admission.

The mage did not take kindly to being manipulated into doing anything. The demon had to go, and her fingers twitched with need to grab her sword to get the deed done as soon as possible.

"I appreciate your concern, but I should be fine." Solona reassured with a smile. She appreciated the fact that Cassandra was looking out for her.

The mage was going to walk away to get something to eat but the Seeker stopped her.

"Warden…" Cassandra began hesitantly, causing Amell to raise an eyebrow.

She had never seen the Seeker perturbed. Something was clearly bothering her. "If you have a moment, I would like to ask you about something that requires your discretion."

Solona rubbed her chin thoughtfully, wondering what the Seeker had to discuss. "I promise whatever you confide in me will not be disclosed." She promised, but the Seeker still looked at her nervously.

Cassandra drifted her eyes to the training dummy and asked in a rush. "Have you ever been courted?"

Solona thought she was dreaming. Did Cassandra just suggest having a conversation about romance? The same quick-tempered Seeker, who liked to stab things, was asking her about romance. Varric would pay a million gold to see this, but alas she promised not to say anything.

"There was a time when I was courted, yes." Solona answered taken aback.

"You are a Hero of Ferelden. I am surprised you have not received offers of marriage." The Seeker observed in bemusement, shifting a book in her hand.

"Believe me there were offers. I… was not receptive towards them." The mage answered confused in the direction where Cassandra was taking the conversation. The suspense was killing her.

"Cassandra, why are you asking me this? Has someone tried courting you?" Solona blurted out in curiosity.

"Yes… the Inquisitor." The Seeker admitted as her cheeks started to redden.

"You make it sound like a bad thing." Solona let out a small laugh.

The other woman seemed like the type of person who did not know how to handle her emotions.

"He is the Inquisitor. His purpose is to stop Corypheus and not dally in romance." Cassandra reasoned.

"Maxwell is a good man, Cassandra. Think about the burden he carries. He has friends, but sometimes a friend's help can only go so far. He obviously thinks you are suited to help him."

Solona wanted to give Cassandra the reasoning behind the Inquisitor's actions. She wanted to let her know that he did not make this decision lightly, for he did not seem like the type of person who would play with the Seeker's emotions.

"Now, the question is do you like him?"

Cassandra needed to be genuine in her feelings with Maxwell before she talked some sense into the Seeker.

The woman looked down, finding the rocks in the grass interesting. "I…do." She answered with a low voice.

Solona barely heard the answer, but it was definitely an admission. The mage failed to realize what was holding the Seeker back.

"What is the problem? You should tell him because what I am seeing is that you are cheating both of you out of love. Love is supposed to flourish and not be extinguished."

Amell felt like she was on a roll with her answer. The words flowed freely from her mouth, causing the Seeker's eyes to widen. As she spoke, she remembered her past with Cullen and the love she had for him. She closed her eyes in pain and remembered the lost time between them.

"In the end, it will cause regret…and life is to short to have any regrets." She finished with a ragged breath.

"The person who courted you, did you love him?" Cassandra asked earnestly, almost looking at her with pity. Solona had to look away from the woman's gaze.

She had not really thought about love since their departure from Vigil's Keep because she had been busy. In addition, if her thoughts did trail to the question, she would find something to occupy her time. Did she love him? Why was it that every time she saw him, her breath hitched?

"I did… and I think I still do." She admitted clenching her hands into fists. She loved him but so what? There was no way he felt the same for her.

"We did not part on good terms, and I do not believe he feels the same way about me anymore. If he does, he acts so bloody repressed." She reasoned staring at Cullen's tower.

"Wait, why are you speaking of the present? Is he in Skyhold?" Cassandra questioned eagerly, standing too close for comfort. Solona felt as though her personal space was being invaded.

"I…" Solona could not bring herself to answer the question. _Just tell her no, quit hesitating._ Solona chided herself.

"He is! Isn't he?! Who is he?" Cassandra asked passionately as her eyes lit up in excitement. Solona had to admit that she was a little scared by Cassandra's excitement. It was like someone possessed the Seeker's body with a heart of a romantic.

"Cassandra, can we please drop it?" The mage pleaded, rubbing her neck in nervousness.

"You already know about who I like. Standing in front of me is a hero. I want to know if you fall in love with the same type of men as the heroes in the stories." The Seeker answered with her hands crossed over her chest, refusing to let the subject drop.

"Dear Maker, Cassandra, you are a romantic." Solona muttered under her breath before looking at the Seeker's expectant gaze. "If I tell you, swear that you won't say anything or get involved with our affairs."

"I swear on my honor." Cassandra answered with a smirk, beating an fist over her plated chest with a promise.

The mage shook her head in disbelief, wondering how she dug herself in this hole. "Cullen."

"No!" Solona almost winced when Cassandra gasped.

"How long ago was this?" She asked surprised.

"When we were both in the Circle, we were in a rather tame relationship for a few years. Obviously, our relationship had to end when I became a Grey Warden."

"He was a templar and you a mage. How romantic!" Cassandra responded with a wistful look in her eye. Solona felt compelled to leave.

"Thanks, Cassandra for the talk. I have to go."

"Wait, you should read this book. I think you will like it." Cassandra shoved a book into her hand with a maiden holding a sword on the cover.

" _Swords and Shields_." Solona read aloud the cover of the book.

"Oh, Maker. Did she let you borrow that book?" Dorian asked in disbelief. By the tone of his voice, Solona felt that the book was a bad reading experience.

 _Where did he come from?_ She thought with apprehension. The mage appeared out of nowhere.

"Yes." Amell thought a simple reply would suffice to not offend her friend.

"I could not even get through the second chapter. I am going to warn you. Your brain will feel like it is slowly dying while you read it. If you respect your sanity, I would reconsider." Dorian warned with a cheeky smirk.

"No one asked you for your opinion, Tevinter." Cassandra fumed, causing the Tevinter mage to leave with a laugh.

"I'll give it a look." Solona answered as she watched her companion sit on the bench, reading the latest chapter of the book.

Solona walked up the steps to her office to pick up the other potions to give to Cullen. She looked at the book in her hand and opened it to a random page because she was bored. Her eyes trailed across some of the words on the page, and her face turned red.

 _The guardsman put what where?_ Solona's eyes grew wide with shock as she continued to read the paragraph that detailed graphic descriptions of certain actions. She never read this sort of literature in her life.

 _This is smut!_ Solona thought in horror as she looked at the Seeker, whose eyes were eagerly digesting the words of the book.

Amell learned something new about the people of Skyhold everyday.

* * *

Member: Maxwell Trevelyan

Location: Training ground

Status: Amused

* * *

Trevelyan made his rounds around Skyhold to check on the soldiers. He made sure that the Keep's needs were met. Lastly, he checked on his companions. He wanted everyone to be happy because it inspired them to be at their best. In addition, he wanted to make sure that the preparations to leave for Crestwood in the morning were made. He would meet with Hawke's contact, and hopefully, the contact could provide insight on how to defeat Corypheus. His musings were cut short when he saw the familiar back of Cassandra.

From his viewpoint, he could not really see what she was looking at, but she was so engrossed in the object that he had to know what it was.

A cold wind blew and he shivered in response, but the chill did not even faze her. He laughed to himself at the sight. As he got closer, he could see that she was neck deep reading a book.

"That must be a really good book if requires your full attention." He teased with his arms behind his back.

Skyhold could be invaded, and she probably would still be reading that book while there was fighting surrounding her. That was an extreme example, but he could not help but laugh at the thought.

She jumped at the sound of his voice and let out a helpless yelp as her foot caught on the bench, causing her to fall to the ground.

Maxwell rushed to help her up.

"I don't know what you are talking about." She feigned ignorance to his comment as she brushed the dirt off her armor, pretending that she did not even fall off the bench.

"I see… so your cheeks have decided to conveniently turn red." The Inquisitor observed with a smug grin, humor laced in his voice.

She absentmindedly felt her cheeks, checking the validity of his statement.

"I am not blushing." She defended with a glare.

"No need to be defensive. You like to read so what?" Trevelyan had to admit that Cassandra was really adorable.

"I want to spare you the long explanation. This is _Swords and Shields_ the latest chapter." She answered while staring at the book in question.

"It sounds like there are quite a few of them. You must have been busy reading." Maxwell was enjoying himself as he was learning Cassandra's quirks.

"I-I have not read the earlier series since the Inquisition started. It is smutty literature." Trevelyan raised an eyebrow to her admission. He did not think Cassandra was the type of person to get into those sorts of books.

"Please, don't tell Varric." She pleaded.

"Why would I tell Varric?" He questioned as his eyes narrowed in concern.

"He wrote the book."

"No, way. Maybe, I should see what this book is about!" Maxwell commented as he walked over to pick up one of the earlier chapters from the bench.

"You can't!" She walked in front of the bench, preventing his movement. She was adamant about not letting him see the book.

"Really, why?" He questioned amused.

"You are the Inquisitor."

He laughed in response. "Your book is in tatters. I want to see what made you so into the book." He commented.

"This one ends in a cliffhanger. I want to remind myself what happens as Varric is working on the next one. He has to be…" She answered, but her voice trailed off as though she was answering a silent question to herself.

"Wait, you are the Inquisitor!" She reasoned with awe.

"I think you already made that clear earlier." Trevelyan reaffirmed, without hiding his grin.

"Ah, yes. You can command him to finish it." She agreed as her eyes were filled with desperation.

"I never would have suspected that you would ask me to do such a thing, Cassandra." Maxwell pretended to be affronted, but he was trying so hard to hold back his laughter.

The Seeker noticed that he was not taking her seriously, and her eyes narrowed in disapproval. "Pretend that you don't know this about me." She walked away in a huff as she resumed her reading on the bench.

* * *

"You would not happen to have the next edition of _Swords and Shields_ hot off the press do you?" Trevelyan questioned the dwarf.

The dwarf was taken aback by his question but hid his surprise with his smirk. "Inquisitor, I would not have expected you to have guilty pleasures." Varric joked.

"Believe me, it is not for me. Cassandra is your biggest fan." The Inquisitor answered in an amused tone.

"Come again? I think I hit my head harder than I thought on the headboard of my bed this morning." Varric mused while rubbing the back of his head in thought.

"You did not mishear me." Maxwell reassured, staring at the fireplace.

"Are you sure we are talking about the same Cassandra? Scowling Seeker, who loves to throw objects at dwarfs?" The dwarf questioned in disbelief.

If Maxwell was in Varric's position, he would not have believed him either.

"I think her phrasing was, 'Command Varric to finish the book.'" Trevelyan recalled while nodding to a noble, who waved at him.

"Wait? You said _Swords and Shields_. Believe me out of sick curiosity I finished the book. I was debating whether to send it to my editor. The series barely sold enough to pay for the cost of producing it."

"She is head over heels over those books. She was like a dragon hoarding treasure and would not let me near them."

"This I got to see. Wait, I am already convinced that she is a dragon since I thought she was going to spit fire at me yesterday. I actually thought that demons falling out of the sky were the weirdest thing that could happen." Varric mused, tapping his fingers on the fireplace deep in thought.

"So, you want me to give Cassandra the latest issue of the worst book that I have ever put to paper? That idea is so terrible that I am compelled to do it. However, I want to be there when you give it to her." The dwarf bartered with a smile. After Trevelyan's nod, Varric disappeared behind a door and came back with the book.

"It is smaller than the last book." Maxwell commented.

"I was not kidding when I said I was unmotivated while writing the book." Varric shook his head in disbelief as he could not believe he finished the book.

"Regardless, I am sure she will be happy." Trevelyan answered with a smirk.

"Haha, you still have not given up on her." Varric elbowed the Inquisitor with a tease.

"I will not unless she flat out tells me to."

"Here I thought that I would not meet anyone more stubborn than Cassandra." Varric answered with a laugh.

"She won't get rid of me so easily."

"Andraste's ass, you weren't kidding." Varric commented in disbelief, staring at Cassandra's back.

"So, do you want me to give her the book?" Trevelyan whispered as Cassandra was about eight feet from them.

"No, I can handle it." Varric answered aloud.

When Cassandra heard Varric's voice, her head lifted from the book. Her eyes narrowed when she saw the dwarf. _She must really hate Varric,_ Trevelyan wondered.

"Why does it look like you are up to something?" She questioned with an accusing tone.

"Now, Seeker, I know your still pissed after our slight disagreement." Varric held his arms up in surrender.

"Don't presume to know me. I am willing to let you to explain yourself." She refuted with a glare.

"Excellent, I wanted to give you a peace offering. The next issue of _Swords and Shields_. I hear you are a big fan." Varric explained with a grin.

"I know you had a part in this." Cassandra looked at Trevelyan in disapproval.

"I thought you would be more happy about this." Maxwell mused. He went through all that work and she was not happy.

"Well, it looks like you are not interested. I guess you have to wait along with the rest of Thedas after the book gets edited to read it." Varric commented as he flipped through the pages of the book, closing it with a snap.

"Stop!" The Seeker yelled as Varric started to walk away.

Varric grin turned smug, and he was milking the situation for all its worth as he started spoiling parts of the story. The Inquisitor thought the situation comical as he watched the horrified look that was plastered on Cassandra's face.

"Don't tell me!" Cassandra demanded as she lunged to grab the book from Varric's hands.

Varric cleared his throat with his arms crossed. "You should really thank the Inquisitor for this. He was adamant that I get this book done for you. I don't usually give unpublished manuscript copies after all." Varric informed while giving Trevelyan a small wink. He owed Varric big time for this.

"I…thank you." Cassandra thanked him without meeting his eyes. She was deep in thought.

"Thank Varric. He was the one who wrote the book. " Maxwell looked towards the dwarf in question.

Varric bowed, without giving Cassandra time to respond. "I live to serve my loyal readers. Be sure to tell all your friends about the book if you like. Then again, you might not have any." Varric muttered the last part under his breath and left to give Cassandra and Maxwell privacy.

"I thought I would never see this side of you. Under that harsh demeanor, you are a romantic. It is rather cute. I will leave you to your book." Trevelyan commented and prepared to leave.

"Maxwell." He felt his heart quicken when she said his name.

She looked down on the ground in hesitation. "Thank you, and I was wondering if I messed up with you?"

"Messed up." He repeated in confusion.

She let out a frustrated breath. "Ruined my chances for being courted by you?"

"Why don't we have a nice dinner between the two of us after I get back from Crestwood?"

The only answer he received was a kiss on the side of his cheek. _That had to be a yes, right?_ He looked at her retreating back in confusion.

* * *

Member: Solona Amell

Location: Cullen's office

Status: Concerned

* * *

Solona was deterred from her potion delivering duty. She received an urgent letter from one of her trusted contacts that they had traced Clarel's location to Orlais more specifically, Adamant Fortress. She did not know of the location, but she was going to find out and confront Clarel. She had a meeting with her Wardens and gave them a scouting mission to observe the area for a week and report back to Skyhold. If her Wardens left in the morning, she would get the results in a week. She would have to petition the Inquisition to aid her cause because she could not stop Clarel on her own. Maxwell would be compelled to help, knowing what she planned on doing. Binding demons to mage Wardens. Something more sinister was behind that action. They had to stop the problem before it escalated. _If it had been any different then it could have been you._ She reminded herself.

Taking a deep breath, she knocked on Cullen's office door but received no answer. _Maybe he did not hear_ , she mused as she tried knocking louder. He was in his office, according to the soldiers, but why wasn't he answering?

Amell heard yelling from the other side of the door and pressed her ear against the solid wood. There was silence and then _boom_! She jumped when an object slammed on the door. From the sound, the object thrown must have been a container of some sort since there were smaller sounds of objects that rolled on the stone floor. There was no way she was going to stand idly outside when something was wrong. Cullen was not the type to have temper tantrums.

She threw open his office and saw Cullen bent over his desk, breathing heavily. His hair that was in place had become more curly due the sweat from his forehead.

"Cullen." As soon as she said his name, he looked up and collapsed.

 _Shit_ , she swore, running to his side. She ran a hand through her hair in frustration as she realized she gave him the wrong dose of potion. She cradled his head as she forced one of his eyes open, revealing red and bloodshot eyes.

His lyrium dependency was worse than she thought. Pulling off a stopper of a stronger potion with her teeth, she forced his mouth open and poured the contents down his throat while massaging his throat muscles.

The only thing to do was wait at this point.

Eventually, he stirred, blinking a few times as his eyes narrowed, trying to take in her appearance.

"S-Solona?" He sputtered with a cough. Some of the potion must have still been present in his throat.

"It's me. I am sorry that I miscalculated on the potion." She apologized while she cradled his face. He was shaking because his body still needed a significant amount of lyrium before he would be able to stop his dependency. Still, the weak potion was better than him not taking lyrium at all.

Solona shook her head in disbelief, taking a deep breath. What was Cullen trying to prove by not taking lyrium?

"Why would you do this to yourself? You know you could die, yet you persisted. You are such an idiot…" Solona chided, fighting the tears that started to build up in her eyes. She felt so helpless seeing him in pain.

"Let me take the lyrium. I would not have you or the Inquisition worry about me." Cullen answered, slightly disoriented.

"No, you were insistent on not taking it. I will be damned if I let you take that stuff again." She all but growled out. He was already on the road to purging the substance from his body. Taking the lyrium again was the coward's way out.

"Back in the Ferelden Circle, before you found me I was tortured for weeks. The demon tortured me with images of you and polluted my memories of us. The memories of my friends' deaths remained fresh on my mind, and I knew nothing could bring them back."

Solona felt her breath hitch at his story. She knew that the demon tempted him with her image, but she did not know that the demon tried to taint his memories.

"When you came back to the tower, the night before your battle with the Archdemon, I was not really there. I remember the conversation briefly, but I thought it was a dream and I put it aside. As a result, my hatred for mages grew." His eyes scrunched up as though he was in some sort of invisible pain, and tears started to leak from his eyes.

"I hated you when you returned for me. In my stubbornness, I refused to take the lyrium on the way to Vigil's Keep. More importantly, I hated myself that night, Solona." Cullen's actions at Vigil's Keep made sense. At least, Solona now had the answer to his actions and reaffirmed her naivety for bringing him there in the first place.

"We had a chance to be happy together. Instead, I blew it and got sent to Kirkwall. The Commander fueled my hatred towards mages, and I failed to see how my own order was corrupted. This is why I want nothing to do with that life. This rift between us where you are so close and yet distant is painful. You may not believe me but …I have always loved you." He rasped out and squeezed her hand that was cradling his face so hard that she thought she was going to loose circulation. Perhaps, it was a sort of comfort for him to prove that she was there.

She continued to stare straight at the door while she ran her hand through his hair. Providing him this small comfort was the least she could do for putting him in his delirious state.

"I know." She sighed as she humored him. She could feel his gaze on her, but she could not force herself to look at him for it will be her undoing. She already realized that she had never stopped loving him, but twice now he told her he loved her in delirious states. She had to pay the price the last time he told her.

She would believe him if he professed to her in a moment of lucidity. Until then, she would continue to be here for him.

"I am fine now, thank you." He rubbed the back of her hand with a calloused finger in reassurance. Solona got up to her feet and helped the Commander up. When Cullen got to his feet, they were standing face to face. Hazel eyes met her blue and they were stuck staring at each other. Cullen was leaning forward, and in a few more inches he would close the distance between them.

 _Not like this,_ Solona chided. As much as she wanted him to kiss her, she could not allow it happen. He was not in full control of his actions.

The mage turned her head and did not miss the sad smile that overtook his features. "I will have to see how the potion works tomorrow before I give you the other doses. I am sure it will work this time." She informed, making her way to the door.

"Solona," He called her name as she held her hand on the door handle, stopping her exit. "Don't blame yourself for what happened ten years ago. You have always been the light in my moments of darkness. Don't ever doubt yourself."

Amell was greeted with the night sky and let out a breath that she did not know she was holding, leaning her back on a stone wall. Time must have flown by if it was dark. Her musings were cut short when she felt something burning in her pocket, and she took out her runestone. Her eyes narrowed at the red glow. There was an intruder in her office, and whoever it was, had ill intent.

* * *

26 years ago

Some time in the past

* * *

That man was bad stealing from her mother. Solona was running after the thief, but not as fast as she would have liked, due to her short legs. She huffed in irritation since the other grownups were not stepping in to help.

Her frustration increased, the more distance she covered. If she did not do anything soon, then the thief would get away.

A brilliant idea came to mind. In her stories, the heroes stopped their enemies because they were confident.

Her solution was to become a hero. _That's right, this will work!_ Solona smiled to herself while throwing her fist in the air in determination. "Stop it right there, thief!" She pointed her finger accusingly at the thief 's retreating back to challenge him.

Solona squealed in delight when a spark of lighting shot out from her finger, causing the thief to stumble facedown on the ground. Expecting to be congratulated for her deed, she clapped her hands in excitement.

The environment ruined her cheerful mood. Instead of excitement, she was greeted with uncomfortable silence. The people in the square were giving her the same look as her father when caught stealing out of the cookie jar. _What did I do wrong_? Her grim attitude changed back to excitement when her mother did not share the sentiment.

"Come on, Solona." The mother commanded with a tone of finality. She could not stand the embarrassment or the shame. She tugged at her daughter's arm to follow her, but the stubborn girl refused to move. Her breath hitched when she saw the excited look in Solona's eyes. The girl's eyes were filled with pride. "Mommy did you see-"

"Not now, Solona. We are going home." Revka snapped, closing her eyes in frustration.

* * *

"You know that I love you right?" Revka cupped her daughter's face and wiped the tears away, smiling sadly.

Solona wondered why the templars were in their house being scary. Her mother and father told her that they were knights who protected people from ugly monsters. She already knew that her mother loved her, but that did not explain why her mother was upset. "I love you too mommy, but-"

"Do you see these men?" Revka interrupted to show Solona the gravity of the situation with the remaining time. She accepted the nod from her daughter before continuing.

"They are going to take you far away."

"No, I want to stay with you!" She had a feeling she could stop these men like the thief. She was not going to get taken away. _I will not let them hurt us!_ The girl thought in determination.

"Stop her!" Revka's eyes grew wide with fear when she saw the Templars' hands glowed blue, suspecting that they were going to try and drain Solona's magic away.

The mother hugged her daughter with all her might to console and protect her. "Shh ,calm down, sweetheart. Mommy's here." She soothed while rubbing Solona's back. The cracking sound in the air ceased, and she saw from the corner of her eye that the templars relaxed.

"You have … a gift." She threw a glare at the Templar who snorted at her choice of words. "These men will take you to a place to train you to be a hero."

"More like take her to a place and strike her down for being an abomination." The templar mumbled under his breath, clearly uncomfortable with the mother's comfort.

Squeezing Solona's hands in comfort, she smiled at her daughter, but it did not quite reach her eyes. "If you master your gift, it will make me proud. If your father was here, he would be proud of you."

Solona could not believe that her dream was coming true, but she had to lose her family in exchange. She wanted to cry very badly, but she knew that crying would not change her situation. She tightly closed her eyes and took deep calming breaths to fight back the tears. She was going to do everything in her power to live up to her promise. "I will make you both proud, mommy!" _I will become strong._ She made a silent promise to herself.

"I know you will, my sweet girl." Revka whispered as she felt the hold on her daughter's hand loosen until the contact was broken completely. She tearfully watched her daughter's retreating back and saw the Templars slam the door. The forceful sound echoing across the room was a sign that she would never see her daughter again.

* * *

Fifteen years ago

Circle Tower

* * *

Many years had past since Solona Amell was first admitted into the tower. She was constantly reminded that "Magic exists to serve man, and never to rule over him _._ " That gift her mother told her about was magic.

It had the power to create, destroy, and heal. The tower existed to block the mages from the outside world, and the Templars were their guardians and jailers. Yet, that did not deter her from her studies. There was never a moment when she was not enthralled nose down into a book until one day.

 _Crap! I am so late. Wynne is going to have my head._ The young mage thought, running down the halls. Solona had a horrible habit of keeping track of time. When she woke up from her nap, she realized that she was an hour late to her meeting.

Turning the corner, she ran into something hard and solid. _Clank._ The sound echoed across the halls as she fell on her bottom. "Ow." She winced in pain as her bottom felt tender. She was going to have trouble sitting for a while.

After her self-assessment, she looked at the obstruction that barred her path to Wynne's office. The man looked to be in his early twenties and had hazel eyes and curly blonde hair. Her eyes grew wide when she noticed the silver armor he was wearing.

"I am sorry, Ser Templar. How clumsy of me to not pay attention where I was going." She apologized.

 _Great how will I explain this to Wynne?_ She scolded herself. Wynne was likely not going to believe her.

Under normal circumstances, she should have gotten some response after apologizing. Instead, she was met with silence. The situation was getting awkward as the templar was looking at her funny. _Did templars have mute recruits?_ She wondered as she tried to come up with a way to leave.

"I-I am the one who should apologize." Solona raised an eyebrow at his stutter. This templar was going to have a handful with Anders and Jowan because of his lack of confidence.

"I haven't seen you before. Are you new?" She asked.

"Yes, I-I recently took my vows and was requested to come here by Greagoir. Today was my first day, actually." He informed with a nervous smile.

What was he doing on this floor? There was nothing past her direction.

"Wait, are you lost?" Her curiosity got the best of her.

"N-No." He answered, but he did not sound assured, causing the young mage to frown in response. What was it with guys not admitting they were lost?

"Well," She sighed, picking herself up from the ground. "I hope there is a reason why you are going to the girls' bathroom then." She spoke with nonchalance.

She got the desired response because his cheeks turned red. For some reason, she liked seeing this templar embarrassed and decided to go in for the kill.

"I did not think you were a lecher. Don't answer that. It's none of my business what you templars do in your spare time even if it involves debauchery." She spoke with her voice low, giving the templar a suggestive look.

"N-No, it's not like that." The templar defended with a horrified look as his face was redder than a tomato.

"Forgive me, where were you headed?" She questioned with a laugh but wanted to apologize to the templar. Sometimes, her sadistic humor got the best of her.

"The Knight Commander's office." He responded with more confidence, earning a small smile from the mage. She found that she liked his voice.

"They left you alone?"

"My watch was over and I was told to report." He answered, sounding every bit like a templar who had a duty.

"If you want to go to the Knight Commander's office, take these stairs and go down three floors. His office will be the first door on the right. See you around, Ser Templar."

"Cullen."

She nodded in acknowledgement and broke back out into a run. _Cullen… that is an interesting name._ She mused.

* * *

It did not take her long to reach Wynne's office. She took a minute to catch her breath and walked right into the office. The older woman was writing, which meant that she was working on a manuscript and unable to keep up with time.

"You are late." Wynne acknowledged without looking up. Solona wondered if the older woman had an extra pair of eyes on the back of her head.

"Sorry, Senior Enchanter. I got held up because someone got lost." Amell apologized.

"Wynne is fine, my dear. Calling me Senior Enchanter makes me feel old." The elder mage answered with a grin.

"Um… yes, of course." Solona answered, a little uncomfortable at the request because she doubted that Wynne would feel any younger.

"I was hoping we could have gotten started with our lesson earlier, but you were late." Wynne informed with disapproval, earning a confused look from the younger mage.

"It is not that I am not eager to learn, but I was not aware that you were teaching me. It is not that I am not grateful… Sorry that came out wrong." Solona winced at her own incoherence. She did not know why Wynne was teaching her.

Wynne chuckled at Solona's shock. "I know the meaning of your speech." She paused when three Templars entered her office.

"Hello, gentleman. Don't mind them, dear. I will explain later why they are here." Wynne answered and took a file off her desk.

Amell saw one templar scrambling to put on his helmet. She recognized that it was the templar who she ran into earlier. _What is he doing here?_ She thought in shock.

"Solona Amell," Wynne looked over the file as though it was interesting before looking over at the younger mage mischievously.

"Admitted into the Circle tower at age six with the ambition," Solona knew what was coming, and she was going to die of embarrassment in front of the new recruit, "to become a hero."

 _And there it goes_. Solona sighed as two templars laughed, but Solona was surprised that Cullen was not laughing but was interested in Wynne's words.

"At ten, she mastered the Spirit Magic class, and sixteen she mastered the Primal class." Wynne closed the folder with a snap and looked out her window towards the lake with her hands behind her back.

"You grew up from that little girl who first entered the tower. Is your ambition the same?" Wynne questioned in curiosity, without removing her gaze from the window.

"Of course, I want to use my Maker given gifts to protect and help people." Solona wanted to be of some use.

"Your desire to help others stems from a passion that makes you adept to Primal magic. Most mages are adept to one element of Primal magic, but you are adept to all four. For most mages, it takes a lifetime to master all four. I don't know what makes you different maybe because you don't want to learn for the sake of learning, but you want to apply your knowledge. I am not sure." Wynne shook her head at her admission.

"Although, there has been some debate with mages that their upbringing or events in their life affect their learning ability. Which brings me to my next point. Spirit Magic is a rarer class to master, yet you did. In order to be adept at Spirit Magic, you need to have a good connection to the Fade. Your learning ability is astounding. Irving thought it best to occupy your time with a new school. Have you some thoughts to which?" Wynne questioned.

"I have given thoughts that I know offensive and defensive spells, but I wanted to have some knowledge in the Creation class." Solona mused.

"It is good that you have some interest in that school, which is why I have asked you to come in today. I think you are going to learn that quickly. So, I have thought of something a little more applicable for you. Keep in mind, you could become an enchanter as soon as you pass your Harrowing." Wynne informed with approval.

"Are you suggesting that I learn a specialization?" Solona asked in awe. She was almost seventeen. Apprenticeships did not happen until age twenty. She was three years early.

"Yes, more specifically the Spirit Healer specialization. A Spirit Healer' s magic involves the soul like Spirit Magic and emotions like Primal Magic. A Spirit Healer, like myself, requires a strong connection to the Fade."

"Which makes me a greater threat to become an abomination and explains why there are three Templars here." Solona reasoned, staring at the three Templars tasked to strike her down.

"Very good you catch on quick. Which is why I am going to teach you to heal from the Creation school. I will give you a list of books for you to learn the theory, and we will practice once a month. You also need to meditate daily to make your connection to the Fade stronger. We have to start off small. In front of me are earthworms. I am going to make a small incision and draw from the power of the Fade to think about knitting the cut together." Wynne made the cut along the worm's body, and her hands started to glow green.

Wynne made healing look easy, but it was not. Solona tried for three hours and could not get it. The Templars were getting bored and a few had their heads bobbing, likely asleep.

Wynne wore a frown and was a little disappointed, due to wanting Solona to have an aptitude for healing.

Solona felt nervous. She wanted to prove herself, but she did not know what she was doing wrong. She closed her eyes and began to think. _Spirit Healing stems from emotions and the Fade. I am not putting my emotions into it_. She opened her eyes and calmed herself, putting her soul into healing the worm. Her hands glowed green as the cut on the worm knitted together.

"Did you see? I did it!" Wynne picked up the dried up worm that shriveled in dehydration from the exposed air.

"Well, the worm is dead, but you did close the cut." Wynne observed with a laugh. "We will focus on different animals before moving on to group healing next. Be sure to practice."

"Will do!" Solona ran out of the office in excitement and glad that she was not a total failure.

* * *

Solona rubbed the sleep from her eyes as she walked the halls of Circle. Her mind was deep in thought after what she had experienced after her Harrowing. The mages and templars were throwing her dirty looks as she passed them. Whispers of her being an abomination were thrown her way.

"Ah, H-Hello, Solona." A familiar voice greeted her, causing her to jump in surprise.

"Cullen. Sorry, I did not notice you were there. I have a lot on my mind." She apologized, rubbing her temple in frustration. She wanted to leave and lock herself in her room because of the way she was being treated.

"Do you want to talk about it?" He questioned her with a concerned gaze.

"I can't stop thinking about my Harrowing." She admitted.

"I for one am glad that it went smoothly, and you are alright. You know." He admitted with relief.

"At least someone is." She scoffed at his admission. Cullen was an odd templar. Any other templar would have wished her dead.

Cullen looked at her in confusion. "What do you mean? Greagoir said it was the fastest, cleanest Harrowing-"

Solona had enough and did not want to be reminded of Greagoir's words when he greeted her in Irving's office.

"That is just it. The mages and templars in the tower are avoiding me like the plague. It is like they see me as a monster." She interrupted in frustration. It would have been easier if he treated her the same way.

"You are not a monster." He consoled, shifting in his armor in nervousness.

"Am I not? I need to ask. Would you have struck the killing blow?" She looked at him in seriousness, earning a look of hesitation from the templar in response.

"I-I would've felt terrible about it…but…but I have a duty to the Chantry and the Maker, and I will do as I am commanded." He answered with authority, smiling sadly.

"Of course you would, you templars are all the same. You are our jailers and us mages are your prisoners. It is your duty to kill dangerous mages such as me." She reasoned but happy that he would do his duty.

"You aren't dangerous." He blurted out.

"With time, your opinion of me will change, and you will see as such. I am a freak and currently the youngest mage to become an apprentice in the history of the Circle. I have always been alone." She whispered, staring at the stone floor in disgust.

"You can always talk to me, so you won't feel alone." He offered, trying to soothe her.

Solona never truly looked at him until that moment. His brow were furrowed in concern, but she could see the glint in his eye with some unexplainable emotion.

"Cullen, that is the sweetest thing I heard any one say to me. I think I am starting to care for you." She walked closer staring into his eyes.

"Solona, what are you saying?" He questioned, uncomfortable with the close proximity.

"Every time you look at me. You have a look in your eye, and I need to know if you like me?"

She watched as he closed his eyes from the question, muttering something under his breath. He looked at her apologetically as his face appeared flustered.

"Oh, Maker, you are my charge. If you are saying…what I think…that would be very inappropriate and…I-I am sorry. I should go." He dismissed her, brushing pass her as he ran down the corridor.

 _He just ran off,_ she stared at his retreating back in disbelief. Why could she not keep her mouth shut? _Darn hormones_. She truly felt alone in that moment.

* * *

Fourteen Years ago

Circle Tower

* * *

Amell rarely saw Cullen, except for the monthly healing lessons which made her sad. In a way, she did feel sorry for the way she acted. Maybe it was for the best since she was seventeen when she threw herself at him, but she regretted her actions. She felt that they could have become great friends.

"You are always under a book, Solona." A voice teased from beside her. She lifted her eyes from her book ,looking at her companion.

"And you are not, Jowan." She retorted with a smirk.

She recently branched out and started to gain companionship with Jowan and Neria Surana. At first, they were hesitant in becoming friends with her, but they were more receptive towards her after she saved them from embarrassment during class.

"We need your help on a topic." Jowan explained while staring at Neria in support.

"Oh, really? I wonder what help I could be." Amell commented with a laugh.

Jowan was going to explain, but the sound of heavy armor was approaching their direction. They could not see the templar's face because he was wearing a helmet.

"H-Hello, Solona." Solona froze at being addressed. She had not heard that voice in almost a year. Why did he wait to talk to her now?

"W-Will you be at your lesson this afternoon?" He questioned, clearly nervous.

His question was equivalent to asking if the sky was blue. Of course, she was going to be at the lesson. She wondered what was the deal with the question.

"I will. Thanks for the reminder, Ser Cullen." She responded in confirmation.

"Psst. Psst. I think someone likes you." Jowan whispered with a smirk.

"H-Have a good day then." Cullen nodded and walked off.

Solona threw a piece of chalk at Jowan. "You are an idiot, Jowan." She playfully scowled at the mage.

Jowan pretended he was wounded by clutching his arm where the chalk made impact. "What lesson was he talking about?" He questioned.

"What was the topic you needed help with?" Solona reminded, changing the subject.

"Oh right, since you seem to be the expert of Primal Magic which do you think is the best element?" He questioned in curiosity.

"What do you both think?" Amell questioned, wondering about the random conversation.

"Earth because it has the power to knock down and petrify. Also, It has power over a wide radius."

"Jowan, any of the elements can attack in a wide radius. I think ice. It can freeze foes and slow enemies down." Neria chided.

"In my opinion, lightning because it can attack in an area. For example, the chain lighting spell is useful when the enemies are spread out. Not only is it useful in sapping enemy mages mana, it can also stun enemies." Solona reasoned, crossing her arms in thought.

"Damn, I did not think of that one." Jowan scolded himself, earning a laugh from the two female mages.

Their gaiety was cut short when Petra approached.

"Solona, you are needed in the First Enchanter's office." The apprentice informed.

"Excuse me." Solona dismissed her friends as she headed to Irving's office.

* * *

"First Enchanter, you wanted to see me." Solona stated, looking at the older mage in confusion.

"Solona, please sit. There is a letter that came for you." Solona frowned at the tone of pity in Irving's voice. Her heart began to quicken as she picked up the letter.

_Dear Solona,_

_You may not know me, but my name is Leandra Hawke. I am your mother's cousin. I knew your mother well for we played together as children. We kept in contact after you and your siblings were taken to the Circles of Magi. Before the Amell family lost its prestige, we were able to locate you to the Ferelden Circle. There are a hundred things I wish to write to you about, but it is with a heavy heart that I write this letter. I was recently informed by my brother, Gamlen, that your mother died two years ago from the flu, and your father followed her last year. We are not sure from what he had died from, but maybe the loss of Revka was too much for him to bear._

_Please, don't blame yourself for your parents' deaths. Solona, your parents adored you and they spoke fondly of you often. In their letters, they believed that you were working hard, and you were one step closer to becoming a Hero that you aspired to be as a child. If you ever want to write about our family, you can reach me in Lothering._

_Love,_

_Leandra_

_p.s. I have sent you a family heirloom that belonged to your mother._

She recognized the Amell family crest with two hawks joined together on the amulet.

"Why, am I allowed to keep this?" She whispered as her voice hitched. Surely, Greagoir would have taken the amulet away and keep it. Her grip on the amulet tightened at the thought.

"Sometimes, remembering what we have lost gives us the strength to keep on fighting or fuel our desire to protect. My door will always be open to you." Irving consoled.

* * *

Solona walked in Wynne's office in a trance. She had lost her purpose to learn magic. What happens to someone when they lost their purpose? She threw some sort of greeting to Wynne, unsure of what she said to the elder mage.

"Solona, is everything alright?" Wynne asked concerned, sensing that the younger mage was not herself.

Amell wondered if she was transparent. "I am fine." She replied automatically, staring at the rat hole in the corner of the wall.

She noticed a certain templar shift, due to the tense atmosphere.

Wynne cleared her throat to gain the younger mage's attention. "For today's lesson, we will practice group healing. I think spending all year healing one nug was good progress." Wynne reasoned with uncertainty, staring at Amell in concern.

"You will need to be good at this. Group healing is the most important spell in a Spirit Healer's arsenal. There comes a time when your comrades are injured. I'll cast this sleep spell and make small incisions on their legs. You will heal as normal except project the spell to these two nugs." Wynne instructed and cast her spell on the nugs. She nodded to the younger mage and stepped aside to allow her to approach the nugs.

Amell walked slowly to the nugs and saw their little noses twitch in their sleep with their calm breathing. Under normal circumstances, she would have thought the sight cute.

 _I must master this,_ she though as she began to draw magic from the Fade. Time was passing agonizingly slow for her, and she was starting to feel distressed as the spell was taking too long to come into effect. She was not putting effort into the spell because her heart was not in it. The nugs were engulfed with a green aura. Suddenly, she was not healing nugs. The nugs turned into her dead mother and father.

"No, I must save them!" She rasped out as the green aura turned to red. The nugs were not being healed, but were being suffocated by raw magic.

"Solona, stop!" Wynne pleaded and had to use her arm to shield herself from the raw display of magic.

Amell did not stop. The red aura engulfed her body, and she felt like she was burning _. I failed to keep my promise._ She thought through gritted teeth. She fell to her knees but continued her spell.

"What's going on?!" Solona thought she heard Cullen yell out in fear.

"I think she is under some emotional stress. We have to dispel her magic, or she will kill herself." Wynne theorized in fear.

Solona felt weak but she accepted her fate. _Soon, I will join them._ She felt her magic being dispelled, and she smiled sadly to herself. The templars must think her an abomination.

She collapsed and fell backwards onto the stone floor. Relishing the feel of the cold floor on her skin. She weakly opened her eyes and was staring up at Cullen.

She laughed at herself at the irony of the situation. He was going to have to strike her down, but she saw genuine fear in his eyes.

"You have to kill me. You saw what I did to those nugs. I am a danger to myself and perhaps to others." She pleaded with a low voice.

"Solona, quit sprouting such nonsense" Wynne's chastisement fell on deaf ears as Solona passed out.

* * *

For the next few days, Solona was very withdrawn. She kept to herself and gave some input during the lessons, but she felt lost. She went to an abandoned courtyard on the rooftop and sat on a stone bench.

She heard the clanking of footsteps and felt her heart quicken. This was her special place and now it was being invaded.

"What do you want, templar?" She asked with hostility. She was pissed off that Cullen did not strike her down, and now she had to live with her failure.

"I-I wanted to see how you were doing." He stated with sincerity.

"Why do you care? It is not in your job description to care." She questioned him with a glare. He was here to mock her.

"I am sorry for your loss." He offered his condolences.

She froze at his words. How was it possible for him to find out?

"How…?" She questioned weakly, staring at a vine that was growing on the wall.

"I found out with Senior Enchanter Wynne."

She closed her eyes at his admittance. The Circle was perhaps gossiping about her episode and thought her crazy.

"I…should have died with them." She admitted with her shoulders sinking in defeat.

"No, don't say things like that it's not what they would have wanted." He stepped forward in protest, standing in front of her.

"You know nothing about me. I was the reason why they died. I caused my family to die of shame. If I was never a mage, then they would not have gotten sick." She stood up in front of him, staring in his eyes in a challenge to prove her wrong.

"I was a naïve young girl. My first ambition was to wield a sword to become a hero. My parents said that I should master my magic to be a hero. I grew up in the Circle to try and master my magic. As a result, I did not foster any relationships with my peers to master the skills. I was not a hero but a villain." She looked down on the cracked stone floor as she thought about her life."

"Magic is indeed a curse. My magic tore my family apart and it killed them. If I die, it is not like anyone would care." She whispered as her face became forlorn.

"Wynne would care…the first enchanter would care-"

"They only see me as some weird prodigy. No one really cares about Solona. I am only seen as a tool." She interrupted the templar in annoyance because he did not understand. The two older mages pushed her to learn magic.

"I don't know why I am having this conversation with you, a templar of all things. I think I took enough of your time. Good day, _Templar_." She dismissed and started to walk pass him, but he grabbed her arm and looked at her with eyes filled with emotion.

He pulled her to his chest with his hand in her hair, resting her head on his breastplate. She felt his chin rest on the top of her head, causing the pace of her heart to quicken.

"I know you think I should have struck you down. You were not beyond saving a-and…I did not have to do my duty to the Chantry and the Maker. I don't think I could live with myself if I had to perform my duty. I-I want to know about Solona, the person and not the mage." He whispered with passion.

* * *

Twelve Years ago

Circle Tower

* * *

Solona learned more about Cullen in the next year. She found out he was two years older than her. She told him about Kirkwall and cried when she told him about her family. Eventually, Wynne was called to go to war in Ostagar, or so she heard. She heard another rumor that Wynne volunteered.

Amell did not blame Wynne for ditching her to go to war. She did suck at Spirit Healing. Petra kindly pointed out that she was more attuned to killing things, but she gave Solona private lessons every day to help her. It took hard work over a year, but she mastered it.

She stretched on her bed she was sprawled on rather bored. Her musing was cut short when she heard a knock on her door. Groaning from laziness, she dragged her feet to answer her door.

"Cullen." She greeted in surprise.

He looked at her and noticed her disheveled appearance, earning a small smile on his lips. "Meet me in the abandoned courtyard in an hour."

Amell did not have time to respond for he walked off. _Well that was odd,_ she mused. Why did he want to meet at the courtyard of all places? It was the abandoned courtyard where he comforted her years ago.

Time flew by as she finished menial tasks before the hour arrived. She strode up the five hundred steps leading to the Courtyard, and she saw the silver of his armor before seeing his face.

"Cullen, why are we up here?" She questioned, taking in the appearance of the courtyard. The shrubbery grew more wild and the oak tree by the bench grew a little bigger.

"Um, Happy Twentieth Name Day." Cullen began awkwardly.

The mage laughed as she felt her cheeks redden in embarrassment. "Well, when you put it that way you make me feel old." She joked.

"I-I am sorry." He apologized rubbing the back of his neck in nervousness.

"Don't apologize. I was joking."

"Oh, of course. " He let out a nervous chuckle and cleared his throat. "I wanted to do something for you."

"Please, don't tell me that you got me something." Amell pouted. If she was spending the day with him, then that would be a wonderful present already.

"Honestly, your company is sufficient enough. It has been a while since we were able to talk alone after Wynne left." Solona reassured with a smile.

They talked throughout the year but only exchanged a few words. Now, this would be the longest they have spoken.

"Thank you, you are too kind." He looked down on the stone ground before giving her an appreciative smile. "My duties are done for the day, and I thought that I could do something for you for the remainder of the day. Once, you said that you wanted to learn how to wield a sword, and I am making your dream come true." He spoke with confidence.

"Cullen…" Amell was at a loss for words. His gift was very thoughtful, and she could feel an overwhelming feeling starting to build up in her chest. She had to close her eyes to stop herself from crying.

He strode forward holding onto her arms. "I am sorry. I did not mean to upset you." He apologized while looking at her in sincerity.

She laughed out at his antics. Leave it to Cullen to think that he upset her. She kissed his cheek, feeling the stubble that lined it. "Does it look like you made me upset?"

He used his hand to touch where she kissed him and stared at her in disbelief. "N-No, Um, right, back to why we are here. This is a sword."

Solona wanted to make a witty retort about the power of his observation, but she held back because she put him in an awkward situation, due to her boldness.

She was brought back to the present when he placed a sheathed sword in her hand. She looked at him in confusion for him to continue. "Okay, draw your sword before you engage. It takes longer to draw your sword."

She pulled out the sword in question with her right hand but held it closer to her body. Was he going to make her fight him? She knew that he was not going to hurt her, but still she could not anticipate the sharpened object coming at her. She shuddered in nervousness at the mental image.

"You are a little tense, relax. Keep your muscles loose, and regulate your breathing. By being tense, you cannot act with speed, which can be fatal." He educated.

She calmed her breathing and relaxed a little. The templar nodded in approval before continuing.

"The last part is to keep your body balanced, so you can strike or parry without being hit. Always, have your feet shoulder wide and when you move, move so your legs spread apart. Watch your opponent's movements and learn when he moves in to attack and launch a counter."

Cullen drew his sword with his left hand. "Now come at me." He beckoned.

"Cullen, what if I hurt you?" Solona hesitated, gripping the hilt of her sword tightly. She could not bear to hurt him.

"You wont hurt me. Now come." Cullen reassured with a smug grin.

"If you are sure…" The mage ran towards him, and she cut horizontally and he lazily blocked it. She believed that he was going easy on her. Her competitive nature started to kick in and she wanted to at least disarm him.

She jumped and swung vertically. Cullen raised an eyebrow as he put two arms on the hilt of his sword, guarding above his head.

"I see that you want this to be a real swordfight." The templar teased.

"Don't treat me as an invalid. " Solona panted as Cullen parried her thrust aimed at him to the right, but her sword was still connected with his.

"If this was a real fight I could have countered like so." He slowly swung horizontally with his sword and stopped before it connected on her left side. "Or you would have been open to a thrust. This is only one practice. You will not best me without practice." He informed.

Even if she did not beat him today, she would prove him wrong one day and knock that smug smirk off his face. _Or get close to beating him_ , she huffed as she ran to strike him with another vertical strike, but he held out his sword up in the air ready for them to connect. As soon as her sword hit his, he grabbed her sword arm and twisted her arm to scoop her sword into his left hand while lightly pushing her to the ground.

"Not bad for your first attempt. Do you yield, Milady?" He questioned with a teasing tone. He sheathed his sword since she was disarmed and held out his gauntleted hand for her to grab.

"I have another idea." She grabbed Cullen by the leg so he fell over her. Solona could not help but laugh as he struggled to get up without touching her body.

He put his arms on the ground beside each of her shoulders as he lifted himself up. She felt his breath tickle her face while he stared into her eyes. She ran her fingers through his blonde hair, and he closed his eyes at the gesture.

"Sorry, I could not resist." She apologized for her actions with a mischievous grin, closing her eyes in cheerfulness.

"I am tormented. " He blurted out in confliction, causing the mage to look at him in shock.

"Everyday and night, I am taunted by the one thing that I have always wanted but could not have… The Chantry teaches us that mages are a danger to the world and themselves. Yet, I am faced with a dilemma to come to terms with this mage in front of me."

Solona felt her breath hitch at his admission. He had feelings for her? She wanted to ask him about the details but he continued.

"The Chantry forbids fraternizing with mages. Yet my heart almost shattered when I saw you almost die. I tried asking forgiveness because I am supposed to oppose everything that you are. I have performed my duties faithfully to the Maker, and every time I prayed for guidance for dealing with you, I was met with silence. I prayed for forgiveness for my feeling towards you. Maybe my prayers were unanswered because this is not sin. I know what I feel, but I don't see how love is wrong in the Maker's eyes." He opened his eyes from his confession and looked at her for her reaction.

A song from a tragic play she heard once as a child in Kirkwall creeped into her mind when he looked at her.

_A time for us, someday there'll be_

_When chains are torn by courage born of a love that's free_

_A time when dreams, so long denied_

_Can flourish as we unveil the love we now must hide_

_A time for us, at last to see_

_A life worthwhile for you and me_

_And with our love, through tears and thorns_

_We will endure as we pass surely through every storm_

_A time for us, someday there'll be a new world,_

_A world of shining hope for you and me._

The song had no bearing in her life, and she clenched her fists at her side in anger. The Chantry was cruel in its fear of magic and. In another life, they would have been free to love, but they could not as they were now. She wished that she could give in to his confession. When she opened her mouth to tell him of the possible repercussions, he caught her mouth in his.

* * *

Eleven Years ago

Circle Tower

* * *

For the next couple of months, Solona and Cullen met privately. Sometimes, they would steal kisses in the library, play chess, or meet up in the Courtyard to continue her sword training. Her life changed when she had to meet with Knight Commander Greagoir and First Enchanter Irving.

"First Enchanter and Knight Commander, I hear you wanted to see me?" The mage asked confused.

"Yes, dear child. It seems that some matters have recently come to our attention." Irving informed grimly. Solona froze in fear because the older men found out about her and Cullen's relationship.

"Do you find it odd that you took your Harrowing at seventeen as opposed to twenty like almost every other mage in this Circle?" Greagoir questioned with his fingers folded on his desk.

Solona relaxed at the topic. "It crossed my mind once." She replied with uncertainty. Greagoir's tone implied that they were going to discuss something serious.

"Solona, you developed your talents far quicker than any mage in the Circle. Most mages take decades to master a school while you take years." Irving looked at her with sadness. He was implying that her talent was viewed as a curse.

What was the point of learning in the Circle if their talents were to be suppressed?

Greagoir lifted a report and scanned over its contents. "It has been unsettling for many of the Templars to watch you. They made their fears known. I have received word from the Revered Mother for you to be made Tranquil." The Commander stated with authority.

"Greagoir, on what grounds? She has already passed her Harrowing!" Irving questioned in anger. Solona could feel the temperature of the room drop a few degrees. She did not know whether it was from the ice spell that Irving was preparing, or the news that she was doomed to lose all her emotions. She did not let the news register because she could not believe it herself.

"Relax, there is a way around this." The Commander pacified the elder mage, causing the young mage to look at him in surprise. "Solona will be given an apprentice."

Solona looked at the mahogany desk that she was sitting in front of with her brow furrowed in confusion. Why would they allow her to take an apprentice at twenty? She realized it was a way to leash her to the Circle.

"Why would the Revered Mother suggest such a thing? It is not like I made an attempt to escape." Solona reasoned in disgust at the Mother's ill intent. Fear started fill her mind at the thought that the Revered Mother would not give up in her attempt at making her Tranquil.

"You haven't, but the issue is that you have the potential to escape and become dangerous." Greagoir recounted the issues of the report.

"Do not underestimate fear, child. It makes one act irrationally." Irving educated.

"You will have to prove your trustworthiness. Tomorrow, Petra and you are going to heal the sick at Redcliffe while accompanied by a contingent of Templars. The Revered Mother wants to ensure your loyalty to the Circle. Don't disappoint us." Greagoir warned.

Solona could hear the threat in Greagoir's words. If she escaped, then she would be made Tranquil. If she returned, she would be forever tied to the Circle with no hope of leaving it.

* * *

Petra and Solona were walking back to the Circle after they spent time healing the sick in Redcliffe's Village. They were accompanied by seven templars who were guarding them. As they continued to walk up the path, they noticed a ransacked caravan.

One of the Templar archers ran up to the caravan and checked it. "The blood is still warm on these bodies. The attack must have happened recently." As soon as the Templar informed his company, an arrow lodged itself in his neck.

"It's an ambush!" Another Templar archer yelled, but could not move. Solona could feel the foul magic keeping him at bay.

"They have mages." Solona warned as she tried to dispel the paralysis ward holding the Templar with her magic. Her hand glowed green until she felt the foul magic disappear when the templar fell dead before her with an arrow in his chest.

"Retreat!" The mages did not need to be told twice. They followed their templar guardsmen until they saw figures blocking their path.

There were twelve armored creatures with rotted skin, pale as the dead. Their mouth looked almost skeletal in appearance. Solona looked at the five remaining Templars and noticed that they all had swords. Their enemies took out all the long ranged fighters first, leaving Petra and herself as the next likely targets.

"Look out!" Solona warned the Templars after noticing the glyph on the ground. Her warning fell on deaf ears as one of them stepped on the fire mine. Solona pushed Petra to ground as the mine ignited, launching the five Templars in the air and killing them in the process.

Solona noticed the mage and summoned all her mana to trap the emissary in a telekinetic prison. She could feel it trying to fight her magic with its own. Eventually, she was able to overcome the creature and kill it as she moved her arms apart, splitting it in half. As a result, she fell to her knees but noticed a sword laying on the ground. Petra helped her up, and she could feel the adrenaline fuel her body as they ran away.

"What were those things?" Petra questioned with a pant.

"I am not sure, but there are more coming." Solona answered looking over her shoulders. The creatures were running after them with their swords waving in the air.

"This is bad. The templars are dead. Greagoir will think we killed them." Petra panicked. Petra had the least to worry about. Solona would probably be to blame since she was already on the Revered Mother's black list.

"Don't worry, Petra. I am sure everything will work out." Amell reassured the distraught mage.

Solona shuddered in fear as more arrows whistled past them. "They sure are relentless." Amell commented as they took shelter behind a hill.

Petra summoned a wall of fire to keep the creatures at bay. "Solona, I don't think I can cast anymore." Petra whispered with a ragged breath as tears were falling from her eyes.

"Do you have any lyrium potions?" Amell questioned while wiping the sweat from her brow with her arm.

Petra shook her head and looked down in shame. "I drank them all."

"Both of them?" Solona asked in shock. Why did Petra need both large potions? One would have suffice.

"Yes, I needed them heal an injured boy." The mage answered sadly, earning a frown from Amell.

The mages were likely to die here. "I don't know how much I can hold on either." Amell admitted.

One of the creatures jumped down the hill, earning a scream from Petra. The tainted creature turned its attention to Petra and swung wildly.

It swung down in an arc, causing Petra to hold her staff to protect her from getting cut in half. Petra was not good at close combat and Solona did not have any magic. She had to decide what to do because the mage was on her knees, and her arms were shaking holding the staff. A silver glint caught Amell's eye and she ran to grab the sword.

She stabbed the creature that was attacking Petra and pushed its body away when its sword fell to the ground. The mages' victory was short lived when more of the tainted creatures started jumping down the hill.

"Do you even know how to use a sword?" Petra questioned as she shot fireballs out from her staff.

"I got the basics." Solona responded as she engaged in sword combat with her attacker. She was grateful that Cullen taught her how to defend herself with a sword. Since she did not have the stamina of a swordsman, she was starting to become tired.

 _Damn,_ she cursed. As she dodged a blow aimed for her head. This was her second enemy. The creature laughed when it disarmed her, knocking her to the ground. She closed her eyes when she saw that the creature was going to stab her. Her eyes opened when she heard a familiar sound of a sword clashing.

She saw a bearded man with a black haired ponytail standing over her. He had a griffon on his breastplate, and her eyes widened in recognition. He was a Grey Warden.

He fought fiercely with his two blades cutting the creatures down in his path. Solona was in awe watching his double bladed dance. After the threat had been dealt with, he turned around to address them.

"You are both mages from the circle." He observed, sheathing his blades.

"Yes, Ser Warden. This is Solona and I am Petra. We are Apprentices." Petra answered meekly.

"Do they teach you all how to wield a blade?" He questioned in a gruff voice. Solona almost cowered under his gaze. He was looking at her like a prize.

"No, I am not sure where Solona learned it from." Petra looked at Solona in disbelief.

"I learned from my father before I was taken into the Circle." Solona lied.

"You were six when you where taken in." Petra accused, catching Solona's lie.

"What brings a Grey Warden here?" Solona questioned, trying to change the subject. She had to think of an alibi because Petra would probably snitch to Greagoir about her skills.

"I am Duncan, and I am returning from Orzammar. King Endrin's recent death had thrown the city into turmoil."

"Doesn't he have sons?" Petra asked in curiosity but looked over her shoulder hesitantly as they were walking. She was still shaken from the ambush.

"His two eldest were killed, and there is a dispute between Bhelen and Harrowmont over the crown. I was on my way to Highever to recruit when I encountered you. Since the Circle is on the way, I can speak to your First Enchanter and Knight Commander so you will not be labeled as an apostate." Solona noticed that Duncan was not looking her but Petra, and he did not say apostates. What was he planning?

"You are recruiting for the Grey Wardens?" Solona probed.

"Yes, and I think you would make an excellent Grey Warden." He answered with approval.

This Grey Warden was not going to take her away from the Tower. She was not going to leave Cullen alone. "Ser, I am flattered but-"

"No, I am serious." He left no room for argument. The mage knew that her choice was made for her. She was going to make sure to complain and talk his ear off before she reached the tower. She was not going to leave the tower willingly.

* * *

Amell ran through the corridors after the meeting with Greagoir, Irving, and the damn Grey Warden. Her life was ruined. In an hour, she would have to say goodbye to the only home she knew. Her person of interest saw her before she acknowledged him. His eyes grew wide when he took in her appearance. Her face was perhaps puffy eyed, and she was still covered in Darkspawn blood from earlier. The whole situation was a mess.

"Solona, what is going on?" She grabbed his arm and started dragging him to an empty room, not caring who saw because she had no time to worry about gossip. When they were in the room, she latched on to him. She felt him stiffen before he relaxed, rubbing soothing circles on her back.

"I screwed up, Cullen, and I have to leave the Circle." She mumbled into his plated chest, feeling the tears reach her eyes again.

"For how long?" He questioned in surprise, earning a humorless laugh from the young mage.

"I tried my best to get out of this situation. I did not know about the power of Grey Warden conscription. The bastard conscripted me in front of Irving and Greagoir. I am to become a Grey Warden at Ostagar." She spoke in disdain.

He held her tighter after her admittance. "Are you sure?" He stared into her eyes, pleading with her to tell him otherwise.

She shook her head sadly. "There is no way out of this unless I die." She reached for the chain hanging around her neck, revealing her amulet. "This amulet was given to me by my aunt. The crest belongs to the Amell Family. I want you to have it because I was never able to give you anything." She placed the amulet in his hands and closed his fingers around it.

He took his templar amulet off his neck and latched it on her neck. "Here is my token to you." She saw the name Cullen Rutherford etched on the back.

"I will do all within my power to come back to you." She promised with a whisper, feeling the tears flowing freely down her face.

"I promise you this, Solona. No matter the distance or the time between us. My love for you will not diminish. These tokens are proof of our love." He choked out with his voice sounding hoarse. He pulled her face towards him and smashed his lips on hers-

* * *

Member: ?

Location: Solona's Office

Status: Embarrassed

* * *

"Hey, I was not done reading that!" The intruder was going to yell at the person who took his reading material until he was staring at the Warden Commander, who did not look pleased.

"Did you enjoy the story, dwarf?" Amell took a glance at where he stopped reading before closing the book with a snap and shoving it in her desk drawer. "I have to admit that breaking into my office is unbecoming of you." She shook her head in disappointment.

She waited for a second, gauging his reaction. "What, no witty retort?" Amell feigned shock at his silence.

"I had one, but I lost it when you glared at me." The dwarf admitted and swore he heard a pin drop in the deathly silence of the office. The Maker knew whether he was going to get out of this situation alive.

"I thought you would have the decency to wait until I told you which I would have. I thought I could trust you, _Varric_." She spat out his name in disdain.

Varric did not know who to be scared of more. Cassandra who would beat him to a bloody pulp and yell at him. Solona on the other hand was not yelling. She was speaking to him calmly. He wanted to know what was going through her mind. She was probably thinking of the best spell to throw at him. If he was in her shoes, he would have been pissed.

"I underestimated you. I should have believed my cousin, yet here you are. How much did you read?" She sighed, folding her hands over her desk as though discussing a business arrangement.

"I skimmed through and used my imagination for what I thought was interesting." He lightly joked, earning a blank look from the Warden.

"Yes, you must have if you got to the part when I became a Grey Warden. You couldn't have read fifteen years of material, in the allotted time you were in my office." Amell reasoned as she took a letter opener to open a missive on her desk.

"You knew I was in your office?" Varric asked taken aback. Was the mage clairvoyant? When he wrote a story about this episode, he probably would say that she was.

"Not you specifically. Go ahead. Ask me anything pertaining to this journal." The mage gestured to the journal in question, regarding him pensively.

Did he hear right? She was going to just give him information after he broke into her office.

"Wait… you are going to answer my questions? You are not mad?" Varric did not know why she was rather calm. She maybe was tired because of the dark circles under her eyes.

"Believe me, I am livid. Since I was not able to hide your curiosity, I will go ahead and answer anything that you need clarifying." She answered with a glare.

He already knew about her story during the Blight because of Elissa. His curiosity of Solona's past in the Circle was now sated. One thing needed answering.

"I noticed that this journal does not have anything written past your Hero designation ceremony. You have plenty of room to write, but you quit writing. Why?"

"There was nothing worth writing about. I became Warden Commander and all my records are stored in Amaranthine. I also have a journal for Warden business here." Solona answered as though the answer was obvious.

He knew that she was not telling the entire truth. "This still does not explain what happened to you and Cullen." He reminded.

"No, it does not. What happened between us is something you will not find in a journal, but here." She tapped her head for emphasis. The dwarf had a sinking feeling that she would never reveal her past with the Commander unless someone forced her head open.

"Well, thank you, Varric, for reminding me how much I need a drink. If you would excuse me." She removed herself from her chair rather harshly, and the legs scraped the floor in protest.

She walked over to the dwarf with a nosebleed passed out on the ground. She picked up his first volume of _Swords and Shields_ laying by the dwarf's side and shook her head in disbelief. She nudged the dwarf with her hand to wake him up.

"Commander! Do you have something to kill?" The Warden woke up with a start.

"I thought I saw something interesting in the tavern. Let's go." She let out a humorless chuckle at his antics.

Varric knew she was not in the best of moods. Why would she be? He read her journal and went through her private thoughts. It was his duty to keep an eye on her because he put her in that state.

He followed the two Wardens to the tavern and found a spot where he could easily conceal himself from their view.

"Oghren, do you still have some of that special brew?" The mage questioned, bringing the mead to her mouth.

Oghren burped before answering. "No, I drank it all on the way to Skyhold."

"Darn, that stuff was potent." Amell answered, waving at the tavern master for another cup of mead.

"Ah, the boss Warden. This is the first time that I have seen you in here." Bull greeted while leaning against the bar top with a huge grin. He had his arms crossed which made his pec muscles appear bigger. Solona regarded him with the corner of her eye.

"I am in the mood for a stiff drink." She explained while bringing her second cup to her mouth.

"I have something that may help you out." Bull answered in excitement and ran up the stairs and brought down three tankards. Varric had to raise an eyebrow. He was not sure what the Qunari gave to them.

"It is my special recipe. Here you go. Ah, is this your companion?" Bull handed the mage the drink before regarding the other Warden.

"Yes, This is Oghren." Amell introduced the dwarf.

"All right, the more the merrier. Here is one for you." Bull answered with a grin, shoving a tankard in the dwarf's direction.

"This is what I am talking about!" Oghren cheered.

"A toast for we are going to kick Corypheus's ass!" All three of them toasted, before they took a drink out of their respective tankards.

"Gah, my throat. I can't taste anything. She sputtered, holding onto her throat, earning a laugh from the Qunari. The dwarf Warden just chugged his drink down without a care.

"Yeah, your taste buds probably died." Bull informed while choking on his own drink. He cleared his throat when he saw his Chargers.

"Chargers, come over here. Drinks are on me, tonight! I want to introduce you all two Wardens within the Inquisition." He beckoned them over with a wave.

Varric did not know what happened. After the Chargers got involved, the tavern got rowdy. The Wardens got into a drinking game with the Chargers, and later Oghren got into a fight with one of the female Chargers after his continued lame pick up lines and propositions for sex. Now, he was watching Solona Amell making a fool of herself on a table.

_Down by the roads_

_Where the darkspawn-_

"Darkspawn aren't a challenge why can't it be a dragon?" Oghren slurred, interrupting the mage's singing.

"Shesh, I can't please everyone." Amell replied rather obnoxiously.

_Down by the roads,_

_Where the dragon..._

Amell squinted her eyes as she tried of to think of a word. The process was very difficult due to her state.

_a-abodes, Come many men_

_Who died, the end!_

"Commander, you have a voice of a … bird. Like a goose." Oghren clapped his hands in acclaim.

"Thank you, I try." She bowed and fell off the table she was standing on, but got caught by Krem before she hit the floor.

"Wow, you are a lot taller from this viewpoint." She gasped out. She was clearly going to pass out soon.

"Commander, I think you had enough to drink." Krem stated in concern.

"Nonsense!" She slightly pushed him out of the way. She looked around, wincing at the light before her eyes located the bar.

"Duty." Amell spat randomly as she staggered to the bar stool. "It thinks it's s-so special. The word is thrown around by people who follow the rules. I know the t-truth." She wiggled her index finger at no one in particular to emphasize her point.

"It is an excuse for people who d-don't want to make commitments." She slurred as she grabbed onto the bar top to prevent herself from falling off.

"Fuck, duty." Bull agreed as he tried to chug his pint of ale. The amber liquid missed his mouth and formed a puddle on the bar top.

Bull slammed his tankard on the bar in realization. "You know you are full of wisdom. That song was inspiring and makes me want to arm wrestle."

"You are on!" Solona challenged after she finished her tankard.

Solona and The Iron Bull clasped hands together, but their arms were laying on the table without doing anything.

"I am going to win." Bull warned.

"No, I am." Amell corrected.

Varric rubbed his eyes in disbelief. The sight was getting painful to watch. The door to the tavern flew open and Maxwell walked in, staring at the ruckus before his eyes honed on Varric.

"I heard all this noise…" Trevelyan began before his eyes saw the Warden staggering around the tavern. "is Solona drunk?" He questioned taken aback.

"Very badly. She drank twelve tankards and an entire tankard of Bull's special drink." Varric confirmed with a sigh. Cullen was going to kill him if he got word of what happened to Solona.

"Really, she has not passed out? I couldn't get through three mouthfuls of that stuff." The Inquisitor stared at her in disbelief.

"Must be because of the Grey Warden stamina." Varric brought his own cup of mead to his mouth.

"Why is she even drinking in the first place?" Maxwell asked in concern.

"I may… have broken into her office and read her journal." Varric admitted sheepishly.

Trevelyan ran a hand through his hair and let out a frustrated breath. "Maker's Breath, Varric. Is there one lady throughout all of Thedas, who you haven't pissed off?"

"I can think of a few." Varric let out a nervous chuckle

"Where did they go?" Maxwell questioned.

Varric turned his attention to the bar. He saw Oghren passed out over the bar top but saw no sign of Solona or Bull.

"Shit." Varric cursed.

* * *

Member: Solona Amell

Location: The Iron Bull's room

Status: Inebriated

* * *

Solona did not know how she ended up in the Iron Bull's room. All she knew is that she puked in a chamberpot and was now laying on his bed with her armor. It was very hard for her to stay drunk. The Grey Warden metabolism was to thank. Her intention was not to get drunk, but whatever was in Bull's drink was potent. She put a hand over her eyes to shield them from the candlelight. She was going to have an awful hangover in the morning.

From the corner of her eye, she saw the Bull tugging on his belt. _No, he wouldn't dare_ , she thought in shock.

Are you taking your pants off? She voiced her concerns out loud, turning her head away from the Qunari.

"It is rather hot in here, and you are sleeping in my bed with your armor. If you are cold, all you had to do was ask. I will definitely keep you warm." She could hear the lewdness in his voice.

"You are insufferable. Fine, sleep without your pants. If you so much try anything funny…" She tried making a fireball in her hand, but all she could get was a little ember before it died.

 _Damn alcohol,_ she swore _._ "You get the idea, make one wrong move and something might happen to your friend." She threatened in frustration, pulling the covers over herself.

"Have it your way, mage. You are not fun." Bull answered with a laugh. She felt the bed sink as he lowered himself on the bed.

"Night, Bull." She was going to only stay until the alcohol left her system before leaving. The amber liquid caused her eyes to become heavy. The lack of sleep from the night before did not help. _I must not sleep,_ she closed her eyes, trying to fight the urge. In her state, she did not think she could fight whatever awaited in the Fade since the creature found her. She breathed a heavy sigh before sleep took her.

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 5 theme (Of Love and regrets) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hiykbcSr690  
> Give me a reason played after Solona receives news of parents deaths https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7nv_m-H5ztI  
> A time for us: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KsfE1o-CviM


	6. To Lose Everything

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Solona's past comes back to bite her.

**Gah, I can’t believe I have not updated this story since January! I am so sorry for the delay. In addition, I started two new stories if you want to check them out. I have been preparing for my Ph.D. candidacy exam and this chapter was very hard to write because it put me in a depressing mood every time I worked on it. You’ll see why if you decided to read it after this warning.**

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**Warning: This chapter contains disturbing scenes and graphic violence.**

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**I want to thank angelofpeaceandwar for giving me ideas of how to set this chapter up. I also want to thank you all for your pms, reading, Kudos ,etc. Without your continued support and interest in this story, I would not have the motivation to write.**

**I hope the length of the chapter makes up for my absence. (I am going to have to edit this again tomorrow. I wanted to give this to you all as soon as possible because I would have delayed posting it, by forgetting about it.)**

 

 

* * *

 

 

“We are the sum total of our experiences. Those experiences – be they positive or negative – make us the person we are, at any given point in our lives.

B.J. Neblett

 

* * *

Member: Solona Amell

Location: Bull's Room

Status: Asleep

* * *

Consciousness and reality fought for dominance as Solona drifted to sleep on the bed. She felt as though she was falling. Opening her eyes, she could see the increasing distance from herself and her prone body. Arching her weight, she turned over and could see the abandoned Circle courtyard as she continued her descent. Before she touched the ground, the Circle distorted and turned into the rocky plains of the Fade.

The aftermath of the fall almost caused her to stagger, for the area around her appeared to be spinning. Closing her eyes, she took deep breaths to fight the nausea. After some time passed, she opened her eyes, and her eyes narrowed as the Faded plains were oddly deserted.

 _It's too quiet_ _almost as-_ A familiar laugh caused her to jump. She frowned as she tried to associate where she heard that laugh before. It was familiar but had a sinister undertone. A figure in the distance caught the corner of her eye. Standing in front of her was a doppelganger of herself with lips upturned malevolently. _This is ridiculous,_ She hated games and this was fouling her mood.

"And here we are again." The imposter greeted with her voice, arms crossed and giving her an accessing gaze.

"What do you want demon?" Amell demanded, using her willpower to fuel a fire spell to throw at the demon. She did not want to take any chances by allowing the demon to stall her. The demon was probably trying to set up a trap as they were speaking.

The demon smirked at her ire. "Corypheus won't suffer a knowing rival. He will be pleased to know that you have been found."

 _I have to stall for more time_. She could feel that the spell was almost ready. "Good, I will be sure to run my sword through him when I see him." She yelled, clawing the air with her fingers before throwing her hands upward in the air to call up a firestorm.

The demon snapped its fingers and Solona gasped when her magic disappeared. The sudden loss of her magic caused her to fall to the ground as though she was punched in the stomach.

"Your arrogance will be your downfall, Solona." The demon laughed at her as it watched her arms struggle to support her weight after she picked herself from the ground. "Tell me." It began, cocking its head to the side. "How does it feel to be powerless?" It taunted.

"So you took my powers to prove a point. Show me your true form, you coward!" She panted with labored breaths in pain.

The demon chuckled before disappearing in a flash. Dust from the ground picked up in its absence.

She could feel its hot breath in her ear. Instinctively, she tried to move to push the demon away but one touch paralyzed her. Some invisible magic manipulated her body to freeze in fear. "The Grey Wardens are finished. While you play politics, Clarel is leading them towards self-destruction. You know of this, yet you continue to hide in the safety of Skyhold."

"Shut up." She gritted out through clench teeth. She understood why it took her form. She had no problem to confront the demon in its natural form. Using her voice was a reminder of all the things she had forgotten.

The demon ignored her command and continued to reveal her fears as it walked around her in a circle. "Instead of fighting your own battles, you have people to do your dirty work. You send your Wardens to the danger zone, knowing they could be killed by Clarel. A Hero of Ferelden, hah! Your title doesn't define you, for you were just a tag-along during the Blight. You followed Elissa Cousland blindly without taking any responsibility. Throughout the ordeal, you made many false promises to your friend. In the end, you abandoned her when she needed you most."

She looked at the ground in shame as self-doubt flooded her being. She did not abandon her, right? "Finding the cure for the Calling was her choice… " She put out weakly. She didn't know what to believe anymore. Still, she should have fought to go with her friend, but Elissa was so adamant for her to stay behind. "She did not want me to accompany her." She tried to justify but the reason Elissa wanted her stay was to watch over Alistair but she failed in that aspect as well.

"You don't sound _c_ onvinced." The demon observed in a singsong voice before standing in front of her.

"Is that the best you can do?" She directed her gaze at her adversary with a defiant glare.

"There are so many fears inside your little head." She could feel its fingers trailing along her face before cupping her chin. It forcefully turned her face to look at its pitch black eyes. "Oh, how I would love to break you." It whispered with a dark promise before releasing her face and started to walk away.

"You still have not answered my question. Why am I here?" Her question caused the demon to stop, stroking its chin in thought without turning around.

It looked at her over its shoulders and smiled wickedly. "I am giving you a sincere warning. You'll be captured and be taken to Clarel. " It warned without sounding sincere.

The demon seemed gleeful, but she didn't understand its motive for warning her. "Why are you telling me this?" What did it have to gain?

"Let's just say we're going to get to know each other a little more. Starting now." Solona could only watch in horror as the form before had pincer like appendages protruding from its back that looked like it could slice through metal. The fingers distorted and turned into claws. Its face was covered, but she could see its razor sharp teeth smiling at her. Its hideous form was hovering in the air.

"Ah, this is priceless. " As it spoke, the Fade scenery shattered like glass and turned into to shores of Lake Calenhad.

Solona saw Elissa Cousland staring at her with concern after Amell answered her question _._

_"_ _I am going to conscript him."_

She remembered the fallback plan if Cullen refused to return with them. She hated to use such tactics, but she felt she was the only one to help him heal.

"The pain." The demon taunted her.

The scene turned from the Circle tower to the middle of a campground.

Elissa was stoking the fire with sticks to cook a meal. Cullen approached and glared in her direction before falling to the ground. Solona remembered feeling concern and ran to help him.

_"_ _He has been without Lyrium for a week. " Elissa observed, crouching at her side._

"Such sorrow."

The campground caught on fire, and from the smoke, the walls of Vigil's Keep rose.

 _"_ _Cullen what's gotten into you_?" She remembered being on the ground surrounded by fire. The sounds of swords clashing could be heard in the distance

"Heartless betrayal."

 _"_ _O Maker, hear my cry-"_ Everything happened so fast after he began reciting that phrase when he approached.

 _"_ _What I want…doesn't matter anymore. –"_ She closed her eyes as soon as her memory self uttered those words.

"This nightmare strengthens me. I shall claim it."

The flashback that was playing in her mind disappeared. Her head felt empty, and she clutched at her head at the sudden pain.

"Demon, what did you do?" She hissed. She felt like she should be remembering something but could not.

"Since you came to visit me, I took what is mine. When you wake up, you won't remember our chat. Let's make it interesting and give you some false memories until we meet again. Here's a present to remember me by."

The surroundings faded as she was engulfed in a bright light. She felt herself being lifted. Looking up, she was quickly ascending to her body.

* * *

Her eyes fluttered behind her eyelids as she could hear the whisperings of demons beyond the Veil, trying to break free. The voices became louder almost as though they were succeeding. The Veil feeling thin caused her to wake up with a start.

She took in her surroundings and saw she was lying on a makeshift bed. She remembered that she got drunk and fell asleep in Bull's room.

She wanted to throw up for waking up too quickly because the hangover was awful.

"Amell, what's going on?" Bull grumbled beside her, voice laced with sleep.

"Something isn't right. " She commented, staring at a spot on the covers, trying to figure out this feeling of foreboding. There were demons pressing through and this was something that she should only feel asleep. "There is something about the air that feels like something is pressing against it."

"I don't understand this magic stuff." Bull answered in distaste. As soon as he made his comment, three areas of the room glowed green.

"No, this cannot be possible." She stated in disbelief as Fade Rifts opened and spiders crawled out of the rifts.

"Shit, what is that?" Bull swore as he grabbed his great axe.

"That spider isn't what you think it is. It's an aspect of fear." How she knew that information she could not understand. The words flew out of her mouth. She tried summoning her mana, but she couldn't feel her connection to the fade. "I can't help. It's almost as though the mana has been drained from me." She tried staying out of danger but there were too many spiders and they started to overwhelm her.

"I don't see a spider." Bull countered as he lifted his great axe and swung down, cutting the spider in half. The spider disintegrated into a pile of green ash."I see a-" He did not continue his statement since he engaged with another three spiders.

Solona was so focused trying to avoid the spiders in her front. Something crawling on her back caused her to scream. She tried clawing madly at herself to pry it off but couldn't get it to remove its hold. She attracted the attention of other spiders and could feel them crawl on her legs as they tried to suffocate her.

"Help!"

"Hold on!" Bull yelled as he killed a group of spiders in an wide swing ,before running towards her like a charging bull.

She felt herself get knocked on the ground as soon as he made impact, causing him to fall on top of her when the creature dissipated.

* * *

Member: Cullen Rutherford

Location: Skyhold Courtyard

Status: Anxious

* * *

When Cullen woke, he knew that he could not put off looking for Solona. Too many things had been left unsaid between them, and he was tired of waiting until she broached the topic. It was years since they confronted the issue. If he waited until they were ready, then the topic may never be brought up. He remembered Solona comforting him after the potion. The look on her face showed that she cared for him, but she did not believe him because she thought him delirious. He had to change her opinion of him. He had looked everywhere for her and he got word that she didn't leave the Keep. The last place he didn't check was the tavern.

"Wait, I know you." A gruff voice cut him out of his musings. Cullen thought he was hearing things because he didn't see the person who addressed him. That was until he smelled the stench of alcohol. Looking down, he saw a dwarf wearing Grey Warden armor.

"Sorry, Warden, I think you are mistaken." The only Grey Wardens Cullen met were Elissa , Alistair, and Solona. The identity of this Warden eluded him. The dwarf was having a hard time focusing on him. It was almost as though he was drunk .

"Well, I be." The dwarf smiled and hit his right fist into his left palm in affirmation. "You are that Warden drop out. " Cullen stiffened at the declaration. "I may not remember what happens the day before, but Oghren never forgets a face."

"I don't remember you." Cullen sighed while rubbing his eyes with his fingers in disbelief. The last thing he needed was a confrontation.

"The name is Oghren and remember it well. Now that king Alistair isn't here to protect you. If you hurt the Commander, I will actually follow through my threat of cutting off your pike twirler." The dwarf slurred with a glare, trying to appear menacing, but Cullen flinched at his words. How did the dwarf know about his interaction with Alistair?

 _Unless…_ Cullen couldn't hide his curiosity _."_ You were in Amaranthine?" Remembering that event always dampened his mood. That was the worst time of his life, something that he regretted for ten years.

"Amaranthine and I followed the Commander during the Blight." Oghren confirmed without removing his hard look. "We go a long way back." He could hear the underlying threat in the dwarf's words.

"As much as I would like to catch up, I really need to get going." Cullen removed his gaze from Oghren and began walking towards the tavern.

"You're going the wrong way." His warning caused him to stop in confusion. "If you are looking for the Commander, she is over here." Cullen's eyes followed the direction of the dwarf's index finger. He was pointing at the battlements towards Bull's room.

"H-How do you know?" Cullen couldn't help but hide his embarrassment. Was he that transparent with Solona?

Oghren snorted at his question."Please. You sodding try and act like a coy virgin towards her, but you're not sly. More like a dog in heat." Oghren took a swig of his canteen and burped. "As for how I know about her location, it's a Warden trick. Kind of handy, not that you would know since you were an idiot." If Oghren noticed the reddish hue that Cullen face had after being called a Virgin or discussing his sexual habits, he did not comment on it. He huffed and began walking towards the battlements to lead the way.

It only took three strides for Cullen to easily catch up to him. "Weren't you supposed to be leaving with the other Wardens?"

"I want to make sure the Commander is okay before I leave." The dwarf answered as he continued to look ahead.

"Why would she not be okay?" Cullen asked with a frown. His heart picked up quickly at the thought of her in danger or hurt.

"She was upset and had way too many drinks." Cullen could not help but stop. He couldn't imagine Solona drunk. He thought she would think of it as impractical.

Before he had time to question the dwarf some more, he heard a piercing scream. His blood turned cold when he remembered that sound ten years ago.

"That was Solona's yell!" Cullen stated as he broke out in a run. He didn't look to see the dwarf's reaction or see if he followed.

"Now we are talking." Oghren said, running along side him. "I have been itching to slaughter something since we got here." Oghren exclaimed, removing his broad axe from his back as he kicked the door open.

The door flew open, almost splintering. Both men looked around in alarm and Cullen almost pulled back from what he saw.

Oghren was leering at the scene before him. Cullen didn't know whether he should look away for Solona's decency or let his pure rage take over. Bull was on top of her,his leg straddling her. Although she was still in her armor, Bull did not have a single article of clothing.

Solona saw her position and hurriedly pushed away from Bull. The Qunari just stood up from his position proudly as though nothing had happened without bothering to cover himself.

The dwarf broke Cullen out of his stupor with his whistle. "Warden Commander, I sodding salute you. " He gave her a salute before continuing. "Riding the bronto. To be perfectly honest, I am jealous that he had a chance to pluck your flower , the Qunari is definitely more impressive than this soldier. "He nodded his head in Cullen's direction.

"Oghren!"Solona's chided in shock, her cheeks were turning bright red, and she could not look at Bull.

"Solona, I am s-so sorry." Cullen tilted his head away in embarrassment to not look at Bull. "I-I wanted to make sure you're okay. I didn't know you were occupied." Why did he think that she was going to wait for him? She was a grown woman and she had appetites. This was a bad idea.

"We had our morning's exercise." Bull stated while cheerfully patting Solona in the back.

"There you are." The Inquisitor greeted Cullen before turning his attention to the other occupants. " I want to-" Maxwell began until he saw Bull's naked form ."What in the Maker's name…" The Inquisitor had trouble voicing what he was seeing.

"This isn't what it looks like." Solona began weakly before looking at the other occupants nervously.

"Please, explain what's exactly going on." Trevelyan looked at her concerned. He probably found it easier to look at her because she was not naked.

"I didn't know the mage was so agile when she wakes up." Bull's teasing caused Solona to close her eyes as though she was mentally counting. Bull's innuendo made Cullen want to punch the Qunari in the face.

"Ignore him. " She gestured to Bull as she recanted her tale. "There was an unearthly looking spider. Bull just st-"

"Solona, we don't need to hear about the details. I take it-"Trevelyan held his hand up in the air. Cullen was glad that Trevelyan cut her off because he didn't think he could handle the truth.

"Actually, I am the one who took it." Bull interjected proudly.

"We were busy philosophizing, although you all think we were at it like the beasts with two backs." Solona huffed in irritation, glaring at the men with her arms crossed.

"Well, sorry for the interruption, but we need to have a meeting within the war room." Trevelyan apologized and hurriedly fled from the room.

"We can go now." Solona threw Cullen an apologetic look.

"That's my cue to leave before Velanna gets impatient ." Oghren sighed before his mouth turned upward into a perverted grin. "Hehe, I do love it when she is angry." Oghren seemed like he had a skip in his step as he left the room.

* * *

Member: Maxwell Trevelyan

Location: War Room

Status: Feeling Awkward

* * *

Trevelyan was uncomfortable on the walk back to the war Room. He felt so embarrassed walking in on Solona and Bull. He didn't care what they were doing but it looked like it was bad. He was more worried about Cullen's reaction because he thought he was going to kill Bull .If looks could burn, Cullen's glare would have caught Bull on fire. Cullen continued to walk straight but he did not miss the inquisitive glances the Commander gave to Solona as though he tried to broach the subject. The door to the War Room didn't come fast enough.

He greeted Josephine and walked in, followed by Leliana, and Solona took her usual spot by Leliana but caught Cullen's eye and gave him a wink.

 _Where in the Maker's name did that come from?_ Trevelyan thought in disbelief. Never had he found Solona's personality to be on amicable terms with Cullen that she would flirt with him. Cullen thought the same thing because he stiffened.

"Well…" He cleared his throat because he had trouble speaking after what he had just witnessed. "Now that we are here. I want to hear about your plans before I go to Crestwood to meet Hawke's contact." He looked at each of his advisors in turn as his arms were propped over the edge of the war table.

"I-I will still work on seeing what Corypheus is doing. I have been hearing disturbing reports in the West." Cullen began but nervousness was laced in his tone. It was obvious that he still had not recovered either from the incident.

"What's the problem?" Trevelyan looked at Cullen in concern. If the Red Templars were in Orlais, then Skyhold might be in danger.

"There've been a lot of Red Templar activity and a higher presence of demons than usual."

The Templars he could deal with, but the fact that there was a growing number of demons, he needed to find the problem before it got out of hand. "Do you think this is due to the Fade Rifts?" He rubbed his eyes to try and relieve the stress.

"Perhaps, but one cannot be certain. There is a higher presence of Grey Warden mages as well." Cullen looked at Solona after his briefing, questioning her about his findings.

Solona sighed at his unspoken question. "I have heard as much. I have my Grey Wardens scouting Adamant fortress as we speak." She informed, causing Josephine to write in her notebook.

"Why Adamant?" Maxwell could not help but ask. He had never heard of the location before, and he hoped someone present would provide him insight.

"Adamant was the Warden stronghold during the second Blight." Leliana informed while looking at her friend in concern.

"Yes, and it's currently housing the Orlesian and Ferelden Wardens." Solona agreed in distaste.

Maxwell felt like Solona was not entirely forthcoming with her information. Something about her knowledge was making him uneasy. He wanted to find out where her true loyalties lie. He had to find out the truth from her.

"Shouldn't you be among them?" He probed.

"My duties are to remain here. " Solona answered with a shrug, but Maxwell could tell that she would rather talk about something else by the way she sighed.

"I suspect something sinister is going on with Warden Commander Clarel, but we cannot act until I am certain." Solona continued until she looked at Maxwell with determination. "Inquisitor , you are meeting with Hawke's grey Warden contact?" He could almost see the cogs going through her mind as she tried to develop a way to find a way to accompany him, but he had to fight her resolve.

"Yes, I am not sure who he is, but I want you to remain here. " He ordered and he could see the look of relief on Cullen's face, but that did not stop Solona from having the last word.

"Inquisitor, I must insist. I need to speak with this contact- "

"Solona, please, don't fight with me on this matter. You will speak with him in due time. I want you to remain here in case it's a trap." Trevelyan stopped Solona's protest with a tone of finality.

"I understand." Solona answered while glaring at the War table, her hands clenched at her side.

Trevelyan shook his head before addressing the Antivan diplomat. "Josephine, what do you have to report?"

"We have received an invitation to the Winter Palace. Empress Celene requests our presence. There are talks that she wants to arrange peace talks with Gaspard, Briala, and the Empress." Josephine recanted from her clipboard.

"All the major players all in one place. It sounds like the perfect scene for a assassination." Leliana mused, fixing the cowl on her head.

"I can't help but agree with Leliana's sentiment. We need to plan months in advance, and I'll have some scouts investigating the palace layout to come up with safety protocols. It's best that we come prepared." Cullen strategized as he moved some markers on the War table.

Maxwell nodded in agreement. "Very Good. In the meantime, Cullen prepare our soldiers for whatever trials that we are to face." With that said he left, but he had one more matter to settle before leaving Skyhold.

* * *

"I'm to believe that you are leaving for Crestwood. " Cassandra commented, sheathing her sword and turned her body to face him as he approached.

He looked at the result of Cassandra's practice and made a mental note to have more practice dummies made. At the rate she was practicing, all that would be left was the post. "I am." He sighed before looking at her hard gaze.

"I still don't get why you did not ask me to come." She stated bluntly.

He felt that she would strangle him if he said that he worried about her safety. He didn't want to imply that she could not handle herself in a fight, but he could not bear the thought of anything happening to her.

"I needed a small party, and since Hawke and Varric have not seen each other for a long time, I felt it best to give them a chance to catch up." He answered with a shrug.

He watched as she ran his statement in her head, trying to find a flaw in his plan. "I can accept that." She said evenly.

He rubbed his neck, trying to relieve the stiffness. He felt like in the months ahead his role as inquisitor would be tested. He couldn't afford any mistakes from this moment forth. He had many people under his care, but one person in particular was acting strangely.

"In the meantime, can you keep a close eye on Solona?" What he wanted to say is watch who she interacted with and her behavior. He was starting to distrust her because of the suspicious Warden activity. In the incident with Blackwall, she was willing to take matters into her own hands. What lengths would she go to fulfill her agenda?

Her gaze softened in concern. "What is wrong with her?"

One thing Maxwell liked about Cassandra was that she put up a strong front, yet she was insanely loyal to her friends. He had to tell Cassandra everything about Solona's behavior the last few days. He didn't like this game she was playing.

"I can't put my finger on it, but she seems odd. I don't know if you have noticed, but before today she would not be near Cullen's proximity. She was drunk last night and I found her in Bull's room this morning. Bull was naked. Also, during the war room meeting,she acted disturbed"

Cassandra's brow furrowed in confusion. "I find that highly unlikely that she would get drunk and volunteer to bed Bull. Are you saying she is a spy?"

"I wouldn't have believed it either if I have not seen it myself. I don't know her loyalties at this point." Trevelyan ran a hand through his hair in frustration. "Do you know if she reconciled with Cullen?"

"We had that conversation just yesterday and I highly doubt it. I will keep an eye on her behavior if it makes you feel any better."

"Thank you, it means a lot. I'm sure Cullen would be grateful." Maxwell answered, pulling her close.

"You know you're distracting. " Cassandra gave him a mock glare while she leaned into his embrace.

"What can I say? You can't stray away from my good looks." Maxwell teased as he captured her mouth in his. He had to make the kiss tame otherwise he didn't believe he could tear himself away from her.

"Go, " Cassandra lightly pushed him away on his shoulder but was unable to hide the small smile or the flush of her cheeks. "Before I keep you away from your duty." Trevelyan gave her one last look before walking away, waving at her over his shoulders.

* * *

Member: Cullen Rutherford

Location: Solona's Office

Status: Hesitant

* * *

Cullen knew that he had to find Solona. After the war Room meeting, he had to send new orders to his men with Maxwell's suggestions. He would have rather confronted her as soon as possible. Throughout the meeting, she was sending him sly glances and he wasn't sure what to make of them. He had to get this matter resolved. He didn't bother knocking on the door and threw it open. He instantly regretted it when he saw her jump, toppling over her inkwell.

She looked up from her ink-blotted missive and placed her quill on the desk. He found it hard to move under her assessing gaze.

"Cullen, is everything alright?" She asked concerned, standing up from her chair.

He didn't know exactly what to say. He seemed frozen on the spot.

"I'm sorry." He blurted out. He wanted to apologize for all of the sins he committed against her many years ago.

"Sorry? Why are you apologizing?" She laughed, but her questioning could not hide her disbelief.

She knew what he did. It was just like her to act like nothing took place without confronting the problem. He walked up to her and grabbed her arms and lightly squeezed them to show his sincerity.

"Solona, I hurted you and almost killed you. No matter how much I tried to come up with an apology in my mind, the words are insufficient to ask for your forgiveness. I should have told you about the lyrium withdrawals. Things would've turned out differently." He cupped her face and rubbed her cheek with his thumb.

"You did not hurt me." She spoke softly but her eyes could not hide her pity from her voice.

"Thanks to the Commander. " Cullen sighed and looked away from her." Maker, if she did not stop me, I would've killed you, and I think I would have followed you right after. You are just saying that because you have always seen the best in a person. That's what I admire most about you."

"Cullen, I think you had a nightmare." She cupped his face with her hand to direct his gaze back to her. He wanted to lean into her touch but something was wrong.

"Obviously, you came back to me if we are together." She answered with a small smile, trying to soothe his concerns. He could not help but stare at her in shock. They weren't together the last time he checked. That was the reason why he was in her office in the first place, to rectify the situation.

As he opened his mouth to question her, the office door flew open and the Iron Bull entered.

"Warden Commander!" Bull greeted while Cassandra hurriedly caught up to his long strides. She looked out of breath.

"I am sorry. I tried stopping him." Cassandra looked at Bull with a scowl. She had a dubious look on her face as she looked from Cullen to Solona with a frown.

"What was so important to interrupt us?" Solona asked annoyed at the sudden company.

"There's a dragon in the Emprise du Lion a few days journey from here. " Bull informed excitedly. Cullen did not like the direction the conversation was going.

"I don't see why you are coming to me for this." Amell answered bored, picking a missive from her desk to read.

"The Inquisitor is away for at least a month in Crestwood. There is a dragon terrorizing an outpost in Orlais, according to what my Chargers overheard." Bull pressed.

Cullen finally understood Bull's insinuation. He was not going to allow Solona to fight a dragon. "Absolutly not." Cullen protested as he looked at Solona. "What of your duties as the Ferelden ambassador? " He reminded.

"At least someone is sensible." Cassandra agreed while glaring at Bull for his suggestion.

"If it makes you feel any better, Cullen, she will stay out of danger and heal us." Bull informed, giving Cullen a reassuring grin.

Solona rubbed her chin thoughtfully. "I do need some dragon's blood for some potions, and it's not like we will be gone long."

"You can't be serious." Cassandra stated in shock, and Cullen wanted to shake Solona to reconsider.

"You should come too, Cassandra. You're Nevarran so you're good at dragon hunting." The mage said with a smirk.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Cassandra crossed her arms and stepped forward at the accusation.

Amell sighed. "Do you want me to admit that maybe I want you there because your company won't drive me insane?"

Cassandra seemed to contemplate something for a moment before she answered. "Fine, I will go."

"Excellent! The preparations are ready. We should leave soon if we want to beat the storm." Bull pointed at the dark sky visible from the window.

"You planned on me saying yes?!" Solona asked taken aback.

"You're easy to read. Your ego is your weakness." Bull's teasing caused Solona to sulk. He ruffled her head and left.

"I'll meet you outside." Cassandra looked at Cullen and Solona with an unreadable look before stepping out of the office, leaving Cullen and Amell alone.

"I know once you made up your mind, there's no talking you out of it." Cullen observed her as she gathered her traveling satchel. "Promise me you will stay safe." He could not help but voice his concerns.

She stopped for a moment to look at him, but he turned away. There was more that he wanted to say, but it appeared that this was not the day. He felt her approach beside him, and when he looked at her she was standing in front of him.

"I always am." She leaned up to kiss him on the lips, but he was too shocked to respond to the kiss. He absently brought his fingers to his lips to feel the lingering kiss. He had to confront her when she came back.

* * *

Member: Cassandra Pentaghast

Location: Emprise du Lion

Status: Tired

* * *

Four days of constant fighting had passed since the Chargers, Bull, Cassandra, and Solona had left Skyhold. The Seeker didn't know whether it was by chance or predetermination to conveniently run into four Red Templar camps. Now, they were currently miles away from where the dragon was said to be located. The cold air caused Cassandra to shiver. Emprise du Lion was cold and she hoped that they hurriedly concluded their business so they could leave.

"What do you want, Krem?" Solona's irritated voice broke Cassandra out of her musings.

Krem was sizing the mage up with his gaze. "You don't look like much for one who killed an archdemon.

Solona ignored his statement as she ranted. "Why is Bull so bloody obsessed with killing dragons? I am not sure if he is killing the dragon for the people or for the glory."

"The coin was good, but I am sure the Chief would not pass off fighting a dragon even if it burned his ass." Krem's statement caused Solona to snort in disbelief.

"Bull is rather insistent in talking the Inquisitor into fighting dragons. I remembered the time when we accidentally ran into a dragon in the Hinterlands." Cassandra remembered when they walked into a grove, and they were almost charred to the bone by a fireball. Bull had the audacity to plead with the Inquisitor to fight the dragon.

"I fought my fair share of dragons. They're dangerous in all shapes and forms. I remember when we went into the Korcari wilds after…" Solona seemed like she was lost in a distant memory until she frowned. "Forgive me, I was lost in reminiscing." Cassandra wanted to know the problems that ailed the mage. She wanted to hear firsthand of her adventures. She remembered when she was looking for the Warden, tales of her exploits put her in awe.

At some point during their travel, Bull decided that they were at a safe place to camp, and they did not have to travel far to fight the dragon.

"Can't sleep?" Cassandra asked as she saw Solona on the ground with her hands propped behind her head as she stared at the stars.

"It's almost as though my body won't let me sleep." Solona agreed, before she turned over and looked at Cassandra earnestly. "I appreciate you coming along ,Cassandra. I would've been driven crazy by the Charger's recklessness. At least you are sane enough."

Cassandra nodded and sat next to the mage. The Seeker had been thinking about Maxwell since his departure. She wondered what choices he was facing at the moment. She often wondered how he could bear the choices he made.

"Are you alright? You were sort of lost in thought." Solona's soft voice broke her out of her musings.

"I couldn't help but wonder whether the choices in the past will ever come back to haunt us." At her statement, Cassandra was brought back to a distant memory.

_Cassandra and Cullen were displeased at the news of Castle Redcliffe. Maxwell invited the rebel mages to Haven with open arms without thinking of the consequences._

_"_ _There will be abominations among us!" Cullen warned as he stepped in front of Maxwell when he entered the Chantry._

_"_ _What will you have me do? Leave the mages defenseless? There are children among them." Trevelyan angrily confronted the former templar._

_"_ _The Templars-"_

_"_ _The Templars abandoned the chantry. They knew what they were doing." The Herald cut off Cullen's words as he looked at Cullen and Cassandra with a look of determination. "If there was a price to pay, then I will gladly pay it."_

The choice Maxwell made that day was not easy, and as Inquisitor he had to make more hard choices. How could he deal with the pressure?

"Everyday, but until that time comes, there's no use living in regrets. We have to live in the present." Solona answered.

"Your experience seemed to make you wise." The Seeker's observation caused Solona to frown.

"What can I say? I am expected to be wise because Solona means wise." Solona let out a humorless laugh as her expression sobered. "Contrary to your belief, Cassandra. I don't have the ability to solve my own problems. I am always relying on someone to find my own answers. I don't regret it anymore because it led me to Cullen."

Her statement caused the Seeker to look at her in disbelief. Solona decided to freely broach the subject she had been meaning to ask the last four days. "So, everything is okay between you two?"

"Of course, why wouldn't we be?" Solona looked at the Seeker in confusion.

"You were telling me that your relationship ended with him." She reminded.

"Yes, after I became a Grey Warden it ended. We reconciled as soon as we got to Amaranthine." Amell returned her attention to the night sky as though reminiscing.

"If that is the case, you seem more happier around him today than you have been." Cassandra didn't know why there was a sudden mood change. When she spoke with the mage about her relationship with Cullen, she was adamant that they weren't together.

"Every time I see him, he makes me happy." The mage answered with a fond smile.

"I'll take your word." Cassandra answered. _For now._

* * *

They woke up early to begin their travels. Cassandra smelt sulfur as they approached a large colosseum. The air was very dry as though there was some entity sucking the moisture from the air. She was sure that they were near the dragon's location.

"Okay, here we are. " Bull stopped at the base of the colosseum and smiled at his party.

"Chief, I don't see the overgrown lizard in sight." Krem approached after consulting with the Chargers.

"Patience, Krem. It's behind this arch." Bull pointed at an archway he was standing in front before turning his attention to Amell.

"Sparkly fingers, you stay out of the fray and send us healing magic." He ordered.

"Good, I was starting to wonder if you suddenly changed your mind." Amell replied sarcastically, looking at her staff bored. The mage brought a staff on this trip because she told Cassandra she could provide some support from the distance.

"Seeker, you can join us if you wish." Bull teased at her predicament.

"It's not like I have a choice since I was dragged out here." Cassandra glared at his ire.

"Well, it's show time. Chargers Horns up!" Bull cheered as he pulled his broad-axe from his back.

As they entered through the archway, they faced a massive sleeping dragon.

"Maker, you do know that's a high dragon, don't you? " Solona hissed. From the tone of the mage's voice, Cassandra could tell that Solona regretted volunteering.

"It's still a dragon." Bull shrugged at her statement.

"That's a breeding female which makes it ten times as dangerous." Solona glared at his indifference.

"After drinking with me, I thought you would be more adventurous. Let me show you that the Bull can handle himself." Bull stated as he turned his back from her and ran towards the dragon. His left arm went towards his chest, and his harness fell to the ground.

"He just tore his harness off." Solona stared at bull incredulously.

"The Chief likes to leave his breast exposed when fighting dragons because it makes him feel less hindered in his movement." Krem confirmed before running after the Bull. The Chargers circled around the sleeping dragon.

Solona shook her head before turning her attention to Cassandra. "You're the dragon expert, Cassandra, what advice do you have for us?" Solona joked.

"Don't get eaten." Cassandra warned, pulling her sword from her sheath and readied her shield as she stood beside Krem.

Bull nodded to Rocky who reached into his satchel and took out colorful round mines. He threw them towards the dragon's direction and before they made contact, Bull yelled, "Now!"

The Chargers began their assault and there was an explosion of the elements as the mines activated when they landed on the dragon.

The dragon reared its head in alarm by the sudden attack and let out a spine-chilling roar. The ground shook because the noise was amplified by the enclosed colosseum.

The dragon trashed about angrily when Krem dug is sword in its side. It turned its yellow gaze on him when he tried to pry his sword free that got lodged in between its scales. Cassandra ran to cover him as the dragon tried to bite him with its teeth. Before the dragon made contact with Krem's body, Cassandra bashed its head away with her shield.

"Nice block, seeker." Krem thanked Cassandra for saving his hide.

"I might take back what I said about you being weak." Bull yelled over his shoulder as he swung his axe down on the dragon's leg but Bull was unaware of the clawed hand that was coming towards his direction. Krem swung at the claw, causing the dragon to recoil back in pain.

"Thanks, Krem."

"Watch you ass, Chief." Krem joked.

The dragon found Cassandra at its closest proximity and stalked its way towards her. Cassandra readied her shield as the ground shook from the dragon's advancement. It knocked away Cassandra's shield with a whip of its tail and lunged in to grab her torso with its teeth.

Cassandra held her sword defensively as she stepped back to put some distance between herself and the dragon as the Chargers continued to attack it, to try and redirect its attention towards them but to no avail. Nothing could stop its focused attack on her.

A pillar of stone hit the dragon in the mouth and it roared in pain before glaring at Solona.

"Solona, you were told to just heal!" Cassandra yelled at Solona who now was forced to engage the dragon. She didn't want to put her in danger, but now she had no control over the mage's situation.

"I just saved your hide." Solona reminded as she threw up a barrier spell to protect herself and the Seeker from the dragon's fire breath.

"Even so, I could have handled it. Besides, Maxwell would kill me if I did not do my best to save you." Cassandra informed as she cut down a dragonling that was summoned by the enraged dragon.

"Do you want me to turn back time and test your theory if I didn't save you." Solona scoffed at the Seeker's statement as she threw some healing magic in Skinner's direction.

"Mage give me a boost. " Bull yelled at Solona as he started running towards the dragon.

Cassandra could feel the magic radiating from Solona as she closed her eyes and focused her magic into her staff. She slammed the butt of her staff into the ground and a block of stone launched Bull into the sky. Bull propelled his body forward and swung his great axe in a downward arc. As soon as the dragon looked up, Bull's axe made contact with its neck.

The beast thrashed but Bull leaned his body forward to put more force behind the swing. As Bull's feet touched the ground, his axe fell along with the dragon's severed head.

"Taarsidath-an halsaam! That was excellent!" Bull pumped his fist in the air as the Chargers cheered around him.

"I'm never going dragon hunting again with you again. I've never used up all my lyrium potions in one fight." Solona panted, leaning on her staff in exhaustion.

"Thanks for throwing that hunk of rock at the dragon's maw. She kept you from being dinner." Bull tilted his head in Cassandra's direction for emphasis.

"That was enough excitement for the day. I would rather make camp." Cassandra shook her head at Bull's antics and began walking towards the archway.

"Have it your way." Bull mocked while approaching the dragon's dead body to loot its spoils.

"What is that?" Dalish's voice cause Cassandra to stop and turn around.

"What's wrong?" Krem asked concern.

"I sense something foul along with magic." Solona grimaced, as she shakily stood up from the ground. Her brows furrowed. "Darkspawn." She thought aloud and shook her head before her head tilted upward.

Cassandra directed her gaze to where Solona was looking. On the window ledges of the colosseum stood Red Templars archers and Venatori mages with their weapons aimed at them.

* * *

Member: Solona Amell

Location: Colosseum

Status: Surrounded

* * *

"If none of us has a plan, I suggest we charge." Bull proposed as he picked himself up from his looting, pretending to not notice their opponents.

"If we run, they would catch us. There's no use exhausting our energy." Solona frowned at their predicament. It was likely that there were enemies on the other side of the archway waiting for them.

"Well, if we're to die here, then what a better way to die fighting." Bull readied his great axe to face the imminent confrontation.

"They picked a good time to ambush us. I wonder if they knew what we were doing?" Cassandra readied her sword and shield as well.

"Maybe they planned on ambushing us sooner, but thought it best for the dragon to tire us out first." Solona reasoned as she reached into the Fade to summon enough mana to conjure up a firestorm. Her magic was interrupted when something grabbed her, stealing her magic.

"Solona! " Cassandra called out in alarm when a Red Templar assassin appeared out of the shadows . A bladed arm was at her neck.

"I'm alright." She stated calmly but winced as the creature tightened its hold. Her tiredness and pain was causing her to have a hard time focusing. When she recovered her vision, she saw a contingent of Red Templars approach.

The Red Templars held swords to each of her companion's neck. The creature holding her seemed agitated and moved its arm a little higher to her neck.

"Stop. There's no use killing her when she is indisposed. We did come for her after all." A gruff voice commanded, wearing an armor of pure red Lyrium. _He must be the commander,_ she supposed. His blue eyes, black hair, and even his worn out face seemed familiar. Her musings were short lived when she saw the red object glowing in his right hand.

"My phylactery." Solona observed in disbelief. Why were they interested in her?

The Commander looked at the object curiously before turning his gaze upon her. "Even with your phylactery, it took awhile to find you. For some reason, it had been inactive for months but Corypheus knew you to be located in Orlais. How? I do not know."

"Where in the Maker's name did you get that Templar?" Solona could hear the venom in Cassandra's voice. This templar believed he was above the Chantry to be stealing mages phylacteries.

"A certain revered mother was adamant in revealing its location. She didn't take kindly to being threatened with conscription." He smirked at the memory.

Solona couldn't help but laugh at the irony. This was one of her actions coming back to bite her in the ass. "She was a stubborn old woman, who had it out for me in my time in the Circle. " Solona frowned as her life flashed before her eyes and that was when she remembered _him_. "Out of all of the places to see you again. This is where I least expected, Samson."

"This is Samson. How do you know?" Cassandra asked in shock.

"Solona, you have grown these last twenty-two years." Samson greeted.

"You were younger then. I remember." Solona reminded. So much had changed since her time in the Circle. She never would have expected him to choose this path.

"The last time I saw you was when I brought you to the Ferelden Circle." Samson agreed, standing right in front of her.

"Ah, here is the black sheep of the Wardens." A shrill voice broke them from their reunion. "One of the Grey Wardens who ended the Blight. Yes, Corypheus was not too happy to run into you. I have to say, Samson, she does not look like much." Samson sighed as he turned to face the intruder.

"I am sorry. Who are you?" Solona glared at the man with long black hair. His attire looked Venatori.

"Pardon me, Livius Erimond." He bowed mockfully.

Solona remembered Samson was a good man. She believed she could reason with him.

"Samson, I've always respected you. I read up on the details of my transfer to the Ferelden Circle. You protected me from Ser Alrik. Why have you taken this path?" She pleaded with him to reconsider his actions.

"Yes, Yes. Reunions are touching but we should _hurry_ up and conclude our business. I have an appointment with the Wardens." Erimond said impatiently as he looked at Samson bored.

"Why would a Tevinter magister have business with Wardens?" Cassandra accused the magister of lying.

"All in due time. Samson, we have lingered here too long." The mage reminded.

"You're right." Samson turned to his companion before walking away.

The mage smiled gleefully before looking over his shoulders. "Kill the spares." He ordered.

"No! Samson!" Solona hoped Samson could be reasoned with. "I'll come quietly. Please spare them." Her request caused him to almost look at her with pity.

"Solona, don't do this. Bull pleaded at her to fight, but she knew this was a fight they couldn't win."

"Chief,what do we do?" Krem asked but Solona could hear the confliction in his voice.

Panic could be seen in Bull's eyes as he struggled to come up with an order to give to his Chargers.

"It's alright. It seems like my luck has finally run out." Amell informed those present who was watching.

"Like you all could fight us. You all are exhausted." Erimond mocked with a sneer.

"You want me right? I'll come freely, if you let them go."

"You're only postponing the inevitable, Solona. A clean death now will be a mercy than what Corypheus has planned for this world." Samson warned but Solona could not help a small smile to form on her lips.

Samson's statement implied that he was considering letting her friends go.

"Solona…"Cassandra's tone was begging her to reconsider.

"Even so, these are my terms." Solona continued to stare Samson in the eye. She was tired of fighting. Her death would be the last sacrifice now that they knew who was manipulating the Wardens.

"Very well." Samson said after a long time. He reached into a bag at his side and pulled out a long blue chain.

"Last time you led me to the Circle." She watched as he walked forward stretching out the chain. "Now, you will lead me to my death."

"Forgive me, but measures have to be taken to ensure your full cooperation. Normally, draining a mage's mana would be sufficient for transport; however, I don't want to risk you flying away." She could not help but look at him in shock. "Yes, even I have heard rumors of your skills." He confirmed her fears.

"Quick. Use your magic!" Solona heard Krem yell.

"I am not a mage!" Dalish protested.

"Lyrium chains." Solona felt weak as the object was draining the mana from her system. She had to fight to keep her eyes open to ensure Samson was keeping his end of the bargain. Her eyes was fighting exhaustion.

"Yes, this should prevent you from casting spells." Samson confirmed.

"No!" She heard Bull yell. She watched as Bull knocked a Red Templar to the ground and removed his great axe from his back. He charged forward knocking Samson out of the way. He cut the chain down with his axe. The chain severed in two as Bull fell to the ground asleep.

"What have you done?" Solona whispered as she stared at Bull's knocked out form.

Samson's face had turned pale and he shook his head in disgust." I had hoped that it would not have come to this, but my hands are tied and this cannot be avoided. " He turned around and addressed his men. "Subdue them. I can't have any more interruptions." He turned his gaze back to Solona and looked at her regretfully. "Erimond, we are going with your suggestion after all."

"See, I always come prepared." Erimond shook his head and walked forward with a covered brazier and removed the lid revealing molten blue liquid. A Red Templar followed the mage and kneeled in front of Samson holding up a metal stick.

Samson walked forward and stuck the metal rod in the brazier, allowing it to warm up.

Solona had heard about this method, but she would have never imagined that she would be subjected to it.

"Hold her still." She felt arms tighten around her arms as she was forced to a kneeling position.

"No! You should be ashamed of abusing the order's methods." Cassandra almost sounded hurt.

"Piss on the order. " Samson spat on the ground before glaring in Cassandra's direction. "You forget Seeker, that I am no longer chained to the Chantry as their dog."

"What they might think…" Cassandra continued to lament the abuse of power she was witnessing.

"Cassandra, it's alright. Tell Cullen that I'm sorry and that I love him." Solona consoled. Solona's only regret was that she didn't tell him that she loved him. She didn't think after this she would ever.

Samson walked forward and looked at the amulet she was clutching. She felt him lifting the chain to look at it.

"Cullen Rutherford… " He trailed off before looking at her apologetically. I never would have thought. "He closed her hand back over the amulet. She wanted to cry at what she was witnessing. The man before her was conflicted with what he was about to do, yet he was going to follow through with his action because he was a soldier. Just like Cullen.

"Just get this over with." Solona commanded, so that she didn't have to linger on unpleasant thoughts. Samson returned to the brazier, lifting the brand with a sunburst at the end. The end had a faint blue glow.

"I am sorry," he whispered as he brought the branding iron to her head.

She wanted to scream when the hot iron scalded her skin. Her knees buckled under the searing pain. From tear-filled eyes she saw Samson staring at her with what looked like pity. She wished that he undergone whatever unbearable torment she was forced to endure.

Memories flashed before her eyes and the emotions she felt towards them were slipping away. She wanted to grasp onto whatever semblance of herself was left. Her power was slipping as she felt whatever connection to Fade disappear. The world turned to grey and in the end she felt empty.

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No Solona in the next chapter unfortunately but the cure to tranquility is not what you expect. I am going to reedit this tomorrow. Thank you all for your support so far!
> 
> Dragon's battle https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AxXEo5FW-Ck  
> Ambushed: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cO_U-jcvQT8  
> Samson's theme https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WtgYy0aX4Y8  
> Tranquility-https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Fmn6dWDNnQ


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